Menopause is really not that bad.

[DaisyRayi]

Misleading title kind of hoping for more traffic.

I could probably do some research and read up about it but what exactly is it that happens to women when they go through menopause.

You hear about women having their careers ruined etc.

Not comparing things but during pregnancy and post patrum I was feeling very doom and gloom but only realised the feelings were due to the pregnancy hormones now that I’m back to normal.

That wasn't about the thread title, but rather about a couple of the comments.

I went to the doc for night sweats and was prescribed (after extensive investigations to ensure it was nothing sinister) HRT. It's really helped. I still get them sometimes but no where near as bad and the cost of clothing and laundry etc would outweigh the cost of HRT which is body identical transdermal.

What I did not realise were also perimenopause symptoms that vanished upon taking HRT were the following:

Dental pain: this was horrific and the dentist was having to deal with so many issues. This was £££.

Tinnitus - gone

Not being able to fall asleep despite being shattered.

Severe fatigue and needing to nap almost daily.

Finding my husband incredibly unfunny and feeling like I was barely tolerating him.

No sense of humour any more.

Hair falling out and dry and frizzy.

Sore eyes

Sore skin

Brittle nails

Epic neck pain. I spent £££ on unhelpful Physiotherapy and now need none.

Severe abdominal pain, the runs etc.

Zero energy.

Huge anxiety

Loss of confidence.

So for me it was a game changer. I am very very happy I started it and I will stop taking it the day after I die.

If you're considering menopause alongside the post partum experience - I note you say you are not comparing them - then would you say that not much changes for your life, your sleep, your concentration, perception by others, finances, job or career prospects once you've got the baby out (or later, more than 1 child) and your hormones have settled back down, even if pregnancy was hard? Perhaps that is so for some people, but not everyone. Do you think women deserve to be written off if they don't sail through it?

If menopause is even a bit like that, do you see why some would have their life changed either slightly, or radically, if they are unable to solve difficult experiences to get back to a stage when their health fitted the demands of their lives?

Wait til you go through it and maybe get back to us. You have no idea. YABVVVU.

It is NOTHING like pregnancy hormones!

I’m reading with interest.

The title was controversial but it was intended to be so.

The post wasn’t actively dismissive. I had no reason to be looking into this topic much so far but it will affect me at some point. However, I have been exposed to this topic through discussions in media and the discussion there is always negative. Hence the quick fire question here.

To those people whose experience is being dismissed I’m sorry. I may well become one of them, who knows.

To those people who took offence or are amazed I didn’t realise the experience can vary widely for everyone, why not to take the time to share your experience. Knowledge is power. There is no such thing as a stupid question. Why not educate me?

To be honest your title is sounding like it was written by a man.
I can’t even begin to tell you how bad it has been for me. It was such a shock when I suddenly couldn’t sleep more than a few minutes here and there. Just like everything else it varies hugely. Take Covid for example. Some people no symptoms but others died . It’s a bit like that range of symptoms, a huge difference. I’m sure menopause has killed women, I’m absolutely sure women have killed themselves. But your post is written like because you are ok all the rest are making a fuss. Disrespectful.

OP, you can't escape the menopause it's everywhere. You can educate yourself and not rely on someone doing it for you. It's as if you've never heard of Google or Davina McCall.

I haven't found it too bad to be fair. I was thrown into it by cancer treatment and knew I'd have to cope with whatever came as I can't take HRT. It has not been anywhere near as bad as I feared. I realise this is not the case for the majority of women and I have friends who have really suffered. However, it isn't the same for everybody and I consider myself quite fortunate.

Yabvu and ignorant!

Find out yourself and do your own research and bugger off.

Top tip, OP: you never want to face a crowd of angry, menopausal women. You will be lucky to come out of it alive.

Why not educate me?

why the fuck should we?

The good thing about the increase in awareness of menopause is that it can help women realise what's going on.

For years I felt like my mental and physical health had taken a nose dive, lots of seemingly unrelated things happening to me. I'd been to the GP and they'd done various tests (not hormone tests) and found nothing wrong so I was expected to just get on with it. I was miserable and barely functioning.

Then someone showed me a list of menopause/perimenopause symptoms and the penny dropped when I realised that I had almost all of them! I felt vindicated and empowered to try to help myself, knowing what was causing my symptoms.

So I'm all for the greater awareness of menopause, I wish I'd known sooner.

Stupid and ignorant comment. Well done.

The dry eyes and vaginal/vulval dryness and itching alone, have nearly finished me off. Don't get me started on exhaustion, insomnia, brain fog, being boiling hot...

I agree. I know a couple of women who have been badly affected by the menopause, so I am not denying that it is horrible for some women. However, I agree that the current narrative that every single woman suffers is irritating.

I also get irritated by the narrative that all women are negatively affected by their hormones. It just gives men a handle to beat us with.

Basically, we aren't all the same. Some are affected quite badly and the rest of us get off pretty lightly.

This sums it up including the farting! And I'm only peri menopausal!
Its a fuckin nightmare. I'm only 45 but just started HRT.
I'd give my soul for it to be 'really not that bad'.

It's always depressing to see women who've had an easy time of a woman's condition (pregnancy, PMT, fertility issues, menopause) dismissing women who haven't as fantasists and troublemakers.

I haven't had any physical symptoms of perimenopause apart from wonky periods, but I have had mild brain fog and mild brain fog is still pretty scary.

I mean, some people really suffer with it. Others don't. That's the basics really.

Do the research, OP, and do it now. Don't wait until 'the time comes', inform yourself now. It's different for every woman, and the more you know about it, the quicker you'll be able to act when it starts affecting you.

Read up on the emerging research that explores the link between the reduction in hormone levels and the increased risk of Alzheimer's. Similarly too heart disease.

For many women it's not just a few hot flushes the effects continue for many years post menopause too.

Was t remotely bad for me or anyone in my family.

Excellent post!

You need to formally complain about the GP you have seen and request to see another. You should not be left to suffer simply because you're only peri