To think DH cant come to this

[KatieBr]

So I am working away in London for a few nights (never had to before so don't really understand the rules)

DH said as neither of us have been to London, he could join me (obviously pay for his own transport) but surely he wont be able to stay in my hotel room?

Someone up thread said Londoners will help you out. That's v true - I have been on the tube and lots of times people have asked me is this the tube to e.g. Knightsbridge etc

We might look serious but we're quite a friendly bunch 😀

I think it must vary a lot industry to industry from the replies. I've travelled with my DH on work trips frequently and it's usual for maybe about half of those attending to have partners with them. In fact I've been to a few of his work events where trios (optional and paid for ourselves) are arranged for partners. Certainly not seen as unprofessional!

I'm the case of the Op it sounds like she's only expected to attend a daytime event so as long as he does his own thing then it seems likely it'd be fine. The issue of him seeming to consider her incapable is a different point though.

Agree.

I spent the weekend in central London with DD. We've been many times. What does he think happens to people who go on the tube alone?? 😂

We do, and I normally get cross with Londoncentric nonsense. In this case though it’s objectively just as interesting to go to London as, say Berlin, or Amsterdam, or Rome…
It’s not suggesting it’s the only place with culture. It’s saying it’s got interesting culture to visit, as you would anywhere else you visited. Unless you never leave your home town/city at all, I guess.

Really???

How does he think people commute every day? I was doing that from 16.

And I travelled all by myself, staying in hotels on business from when I was 20.

Why does he think you won't cope?

Its not scary but if you are not used to it then I don't see an issue with you husband tagging along. My DH did exactly this many years ago. My work had scheduled me on a late flight getting into London about 11pm at night. He paid his own flights and food. Next day I attended my course, he visited a few museums and at the end of the day we few back home again.

100% fine

She's already said she has free time which is why she wants her DH to come.

I find it a little too convenient that your partner has told you he "has to work immediately" on trips. Nearly every trip I've been on, there's been time to relax and enjoy an evening dinner/morning after/extra day at least. Often more. I would wonder why he doesn't want you with him?

Check with your company on policies, but don't see a problem really.

Also, depends on your company but with ours there is a loose expectation of networking/socialising with colleagues while visiting so probably best to check with line manager it is ok.

We have sometimes have spouses joining us at after work meals etc and it can be a bit awkward when discussion work related topics or when the bill comes and the person who brought their spouse needs to be asked to pay for them separately.

Same. Home educate and we’ve all gone before.

@Hello98765 Where else in the UK can you see the same range & calibre of theatre and art?

Edinburgh.

Especially in August when it hosts the largest and most diverse festivals in the entire world.

The Fringe is only surpassed by the Olympics and the football World Cup in terms of ticketed events.

London who?

In light of this, I'd definitely recommend going on your own. It's central London, not Mordor.

This made me snort laughing

I can't see how he can be in a position not to recommend tube travel when he has never been to London? What does he think it is?

I have to go to London for work now and then (after having previously lived there for 35 years), and I absolutely love going on my own, taking myself out to a nice restaurant, wandering about etc. I do take DH and DS with me every third or fourth time and we make a weekend of it. In your position, it being the first visit to this major world city, I'd be keen to take the DH and share the experience. Then maybe later visits on your own?

I don’t think it would be a problem, I’ve been with DH on work trips to Wales and we just had to let the hotel know there would be two guests in the room (fire regs) and that only one breakfast would be billed to work.

If my work were to send me to London though…I love DH but I’d go on my own, I think I’d have a much better time.

How have you never been to London!!

and you don’t need a ‘man’ to help you get the tube around. Jesus Christ

Perhaps he's just expressing concern for her safety in a strange environment. Lots of people do it every day without problems, some do have issues. There was a post a while ago about someone who's partner expected her to make her own way home from the station. Again lots of people do this frequently without issue some have problems. He may be concerned that she's more likely to be attacked or robbed in London than in their home town.

I was allowed to take my partner on a work trip to America! It depends on the company and its policy.

I do get that the "good god how have you never been to London?" comments could be seen as London-centric and patronising etc, but it must surely be usually for two people married to each other, living in a western European country, to have neither ever been to the capital city! (Maybe they bonded over their mutual dislike of cities?)

That's ridiculous!
He is just wanting to come along - which does seem a good idea.
Otherwise - it's just a city, with a public transport system used by everyone from school children to overseas visitors.

Is it just you coming down or will there be a load of you from your company in the hotel? If just you and it's a PI, no one will know anyway. Do it!

Spend your evening on the South Bank or Covent Garden, ask us for some great places to eat and what to see!

I find it a little too convenient that your partner has told you he "has to work immediately" on trips. Nearly every trip I've been on, there's been time to relax and enjoy an evening dinner/morning after/extra day at least. Often more. I would wonder why he doesn't want you with him?

No idea who you work for but an "extra day at least" and "often more" on a work trip is so far removed from reality in any business I've ever worked in that I don't think we even inhabit the same planet.

It's normal to arrive only the night before, or maybe day before if long haul, and then crack on with whatever it is.

Having worked on 6 continents for the big multinationals (oil & gas, pharma, etc) with generous travel policies, I can count on, well, one finger, the number of times there's been a full extra day at a given location after finishing, and then it was only because I didn't want to risk missing the only decent flight home after meetings in Jakarta. Even sales conferences piss-ups are well enough choreographed that there's not that much free time after the event.

Public transport in London is easy peasy, and there is so much to do by yourself. I love to hang out in museums myself when I have time to kill between things.

That said, nothing wrong with your dh joining you either, I've never had an employer or hotel object to having him stay over if he was in the same town. So if it would be a treat for him feel free, but you don't need him in any way.

Ok but it takes me 4 hours by the fastest possible method to get to London from my house and it costs a fortune to stay there. It's just not as attractive as going elsewhere to seek culture!

I've lived in London over 20 years, get the tube/bus etc all the time. None of this has happened to me.

The worst that happens on the tube is generally the pass-agg tutting and the subtle manoeuvres and body-blocks as people fight for seats but oh-so-quietly.

@araiwa - so you are saying definitively that this would be gross misconduct and against company policy in every company in the UK?

I hope not, because that would be a ridiculous generalisation, and the fact that various posters on this thread have said that it definitely IS allowed by their employers proves you wrong.

I have stayed with dh at his hotel, when he has been travelling for work - his company permitted it, as long as we paid for my meals.