To feel like I've let my kids down..

[sunkmybattleship]

My house feels so cramped. It's probably worth around £200k ish, it just has a tiny entrance hall which won't even be 6x6ft, a small living room with stairs for upstairs in it, small kitchen and conservatory. Upstairs tiny bathroom and 3 rooms, my daughter's barely having room for a dinky bed and wardrobe. Useless garden.

My friend has moved into her old family home which is bought and paid for.. it's huge. So much room for the kids, acres of land. My daughter loved having all the toys there was that we just don't have room for. We have no room for toys really, or any space.

We can't afford anything better, we both work full time as it is. I just feel like I've let them down for only being able to afford such a small house.

^This.

I've not read the entire thread but your description of your home sounds similar to ours (but ours is smaller) and I feel the same way. It's what I would call a starter home and I never planned on being here as long as we have but I've had no choice.

Ours is a tiny hall (it's the width of the front door squared) into a small living room and kitchen. Garden is awful and no matter what I've tried it's just been awful due to the ground. Luckily its small. Upstairs we have a small landing, (I'm taking 3 doors coming off in a U Shape and no wall in between) to a small bathroom the length of a small bath, a box bedroom and a main room that fits a wardrobe and king-size bed. If you haven't guessed it's all small lol.

It was OK when it was just me starting out but then my child came along, my relationship broke down and its been me and him since. I've sometimes found myself abit jealous of others being able to do up, move or extend when it takes me years to he able to make any changes. Lockdown was the worst as so many people improved their homes and i was literally pulling my hair out trying to survive on furlough let alone make changes to our home. I've even been upset at times that I can't give my son a better home, with more space. Even in the communal areas we are under each others feet. When we do have guests it's chaos and makes me so anxious.

However my son loves his home. It's all his ever known and talks about it so sweetly. When he was younger he would get upset at the idea of moving house. When I tell him my wishes he will always respond with how lovely he thinks our home is.

As much as we feel we have let our children down to our children this is their home, their safety and where the most important people in their lives live, with them. Don't be hard on yourself as much as I know myself it's hard to not wish we could do more.

Excuse me? I'm solid middle class and middle aged and we've never been able to afford either of those nor do we complain about it. Nothing sudden about it.

OP, quit the self pity party and work on your garden. Make it a family thing. I’ve also got a small backyard with limited space but have made it quite a cozy, enjoyable space. You can all do this!

3 bed bathroom down stairs, tiny kitchen house to now after extension 5 bed, 2 bathroom, 1 ensuite house with utility room dog room and kitchen diner. My kids are no happier or more loved if anything it was detrimental to our family as it was a self build and hubby was always busy and still not 100% finished. We have less money as bigger mortgage and bills so less disposable income for holidays and days out. No we aren't well off hubby is a employed builder and I'm a carer. point is the grass is not always greener! A bigger house doesn't make you happier x

At the moment, me and my husband and 6 children share a 2 bedroomed home. Me and my husband sleep on the L shaped sofa, the twins in the cots next to us, the 4 older children share the two small upstairs bedrooms, so I understand lack of space. But my kids are clean, fed, clothed and we are extremely happy and close. Myself and my husband are both disabled and we had a huge drop in income, but we thank our lucky stars that having this tiny property means we save money for the odd week away together and we know full well before we know it we will yearn for these madcap busy days and our two bed house will one day seem huge lol. X 😊 anyway, smaller house + less housework = more time to play and enjoy the kids lol

OP - do you love your kids and spend time with them (I hate the term quality time - but you know, fun stuff/playing etc)? Because if you do they won’t really give a crap about the size of your back garden.