Neighbour using my drop kerb!

[mykerb]

A new family have moved in next door - not attached we are a row of two semi's each and so on..
I have a driveway and a dropped kerb. So it goes my drive, pavement and then the dropped kerb.

My next door neighbours have a make shift drive (from previous tenants) but NO dropped kerb, it doesn't help that their neighbours have 4 cars and two permanently parked outside their garden so the new neighbours have nowhere to park except down the road because of it but again not my problem!

They have started driving over my drop kerb to park in the make shift drive, I have started parking on my dropped kerb to make a point of it and I did block them in, to which the woman politely asked if I could move my car so she could reverse out, I told her I don't appreciate her using the kerb to park in, to which she replied that she is going to be getting the curb outside hers dropped but it will take a while due to getting planning permission etc and it's hard to walk down the road with 3 kids and a newborn so it's just been more convenient, but she won't do it again if it bothers me.

Tbh she hasn't had a chance to park there again as I have started parking in front of my drive, on my dropped kerb but my sister has said I'm being petty for no reason and making her life harder and it's not a big deal! And it's really irked me because now I don't know if I'm being unreasonable or not!

I’m a wheelchair user so not likely I’d say that. But hey you go ahead deliberately misunderstanding what I’m saying. It’s not ‘miiiiiiinnnnnereee’. And it’s not about crossing it. It’s about people using it to drive up the dropped kerb and onto pavement that hasn’t been reinforced for the weight of a car, and damaging it in the process. Illegal. Not OK long term, but fine while they’re waiting for their own to be done. If, in fact, they are. If they’re not, and they’re using OP’s as a cheap option, then they’re CF’s. Which is what I essentially said.

If the pavement is damaged (which I doubt it will be by being driven over occasionally for a short period of time), it won’t affect the op.

@mykerb You have had a hard time on here, but you are being extremely petty yes. And as many posters have said, even if you pay for a drop-kerb, you don't own it. Your neighbours are perfectly entitled to drive over it.

Wow. Can we swap lives?! If that is the biggest concern you have, you are a very privileged person!
Yes, YABU. Your poor neighbour probably wishes she could move already.

@Rosscameasdoody you can drive up a dropped kerb, what you can't do is drive over a pavement that has been dropped!

Just because OP had it dropped doesn't mean she can say it's all miiiinnnneeeeee!!

More info attached for you!

Google really is your friend in these situations.

@Rosscameasdoody

The OP doesn't own the pavement it's a public maintainable highway!

Why can't you just google it and understand!

The OP cannot go out and make repairs to the "reinforced" pavement. if it's damaged the highways maintain it and they don't ask if anyone outwith OPs family has been using it!

Christ on a bike, it's not difficult to understand!

Yes, why is it so difficult to understand ? If you’re resident in a road where there’s no dropped kerb to your own drive, then it becomes your responsibility to pay for the facility, which includes dropping the kerb and reinforcing the pavement directly in front of your driveway so that you can drive over it without damaging said pavement with the weight of the car.

OP’s neighbours are using a facility the OP has bought and paid for, and which applies to her own property only. Not the ground it sits on, but the actual facility of legally accessing her own driveway. The neighbours have not. So they are essentially taking advantage of a facility - a service, if you like to think of it that way, that OP has paid for. They are driving onto pavement that hasn’t been reinforced and damaging it. You might want to think about what would happen if everyone did this. You might also want to think about it the next time you or any of your loved ones trip and fall on a damaged pavement as a result of this type of entitled behaviour.

No one is saying that the neighbour isn’t in a difficult situation, but you can’t just ignore the law and do as you like.

Good god, what a welcome to the neighbourhood. You’re being extremely unreasonable and petty & as far as I’m aware it isn’t “your @ drop curb. It belongs to the highways dept !!

No one is saying that the neighbour isn’t in a difficult situation, but you can’t just ignore the law and do as you like.

But she has got three kids so of course she can do whatever is easier for her!

The dropped curb is Infront of OPs house and if someone blocked her in and she complained then it would be illegal, but I believe it's not illegal to block access to a driveway if there is no car in it and also the neighbour does not have a driveway (if they did, they would have a dropped curb) so not sure how blocking vehicle access here can be illegal???
I think I would give them 3 months to get the application in and in that time let them use it, but let them know that if they don't you will start blocking your own drive again.

I really don't understand how this effects you in any way.

Why don’t you apply some brain power and try to understand what’s being said here. It’s not rocket science. You can’t legally drive over a pavement that hasn’t been reinforced to take the weight of the car. That’s what the neighbours are doing. Lots of info on google is not correct. And printing it in large print is pointless. I’m not blind and it doesn’t make you right.

Sarcasm I assume - difficult to tell in writing. I live opposite a school and I’ve seen mothers with children doing some horrendously dangerous things at pick up, in the name of ‘easier’.

I don't think your neighbour is doing anything wrong to you really but neighbours can be annoying just by existing (haha) when you live in busy areas. I do get your point though that if I had paid a lot of money for a dropped kerb and then someone kept suddenly using it without asking ever as they haven't yet done theirs it could feel annoying but I don't think your neighbour will have thought about it like that herself. I recently installed a new fence and my neighbour keeps leaning rubbish against it from his side and it feels annoying to me as I went to the effort to pay for it and fit it - it feels like he got something of mine for nothing and is now causing damp on it and so isn't grateful but many people on here will probably not get my view on that.

All that said I went to Cognitive Behavioural Therapy classes and they said to look for your triggers as there's a deeper reason behind your reaction. Look at what this triggers in you-do you feel like you're being taken advantage of and that people always do that because you think they perceive you as weak in some way. Or do you feel like people never ask your permission to use your things like they don't have to as they are more important than you are..that kind of thing. Then look for common themes - a feeling that in your mind people always see you as weak or that you feel people see your needs as less important than theirs that sort of thing. Then look at where your assumption could stem from in your life such as a traumatic time in your life or how you were constantly belittled by a parent. You need to keep looking for triggers in every day life to work out why that might irritate you so much x

This is incredibly petty and I think you need to reassess the way you look at things.

It’s coming from some weird sense of possessiveness… like it’s YOUR curb and you don’t want anyone else touching it even if it doesn’t inconvenience you in the slightest. Quite a small-minded way of thinking, isn’t it?!

Can’t you just reframe it as we are all human b beings, neighbours, we’re all in this together, and it’s nice to be able to help someone out. Particularly if it takes 0 effort on your part and causes you 0 inconvenience.

It doesn’t matter whether she owns it or not. Who owns the actual land is irrelevant. She has paid for the facility to access her own driveway via a dropped kerb and reinforced pavement. It applies to her own driveway directly in front of the dropped kerb and the section of pavement reinforced to take the weight of her car. It’s not a licence for CF’s to use it because they can’t be arsed to pay for their own. And it’s not down to OP’s permission either. The council would likely take action if they knew it was happening because it’s damaging the pavement they maintain.

@Rosscameasdoody no you can't drive over a kerb that hadn't been dropped! FACT!!

The pavement is not reinforced, having arranged two dropped kerbs it's just lowered sweetie!!!

Welcome to the neighbourhood, neighbour! 🙄🙄

Wow what a horrible neighbour you are 🫣

The land it sits on belongs to the council. The facility to use it to access her driveway belongs to the OP. A service. Bought and paid for. If the neighbours want the same service they should buy and pay for it the same as OP has done.

Yes You are being unreasonable .

It’s still no allowed to park over a blocked curb even if it’s in front of your own property and you paid to put it there- because it still belongs entirely to the council. She isn’t parking on her own land, she is parking in front of a council supplied utility.

@Rosscameasdoody they are in the process of paying from it!

Meanwhile do you think the insurance company about not parking off road? I hope not and I hope she gets hit and they won't pay up!

I don't want myyyyyyy premiums to pay for people that defraud insurance companies!

Don’t you understand that just because you pay for a drop kerb it does not mean you own it!

Jesus Christ, I haven't seen something worth nominating for the Mumsnet classics page for ages 😂 This is so funny