Mothers Day should be banned

[DinnaeFashYersel]

Thread after thread on here with Mothers Day drama and grief

Partners who haven't made any plans
Partners whose plans aren't WOW enough
Mothers v MILs
Mothers v Mothers and MILS
Partner isn't making plans for mother of unborn baby
Blended family dramas
The list goes on and on

Post Mothers Day will have the threads

He forgot
It was rubbish compared to the elaborate day he got for Fathers Day
MIL spoiled it
Etc

Its not worth it. It seems to be make so many people unhappy and angry and we'd be better off without.

YABU: its a cherished and important day, how dare you even ask
YANBU: ban it and save us all from the grief and drama

Full disclosure: I celebrate it to the extent that my kids will serve me tea and (burnt) toast in bed. Otherwise its a normal day. And of course I know it won't actually be banned. Its just a discussion.

Iv never said anything about Mother’s Day, I am aware of its roots and I’m not religious.
last year DD was out with friends the day before Mother’s Day. Her friends were being stuff and asked DD what she had got me, when she told them nothing they made her feel bad, told her it was a test when I said I didn’t want anything.
she came home very confused and we had a chat about it. I told her what I value from her and what she could do, as and when she wanted.
this year I see that Some of the supermarkets are actually saying in there advertising that when mum says she doesn’t want anything it means she does.
none of this helps.

It's a real heartache for estranged mothers

I love it when people say it's very commercialised then list what they're buying/expecting! Can't they see the irony of it?

And we boomers too would be banned!

So the message is, the more inconsequential the celebration the better? Small weddings are better than big? A card for birthdays but no gifts? All the anti mothers day curmudgeons are as bad as the complaining posters they claim to despise

It's not a Christian festival, it's a tradition originally called Mothering Sunday. Young ladies in service were given the day off to go home to their mothers and attend their "mother" church. It has become "Mothers' Day" and become the commercialised, high pressure, overemotional event we now have to put up with. Another way for retailers to grab money from us.

Been at work and it’s hell on MD Sat. I put a roller of plants (about 60-70) onto the display and an hour later it was all gone. Even my manager didn’t believe me! Only when he saw no plants in the warehouse!

We had about a dozen roll cages of cut flowers and just down to one.

Anyone thinking to buy flowers or plants tomorrow- forget it! As we get a very small flower delivery tomorrow and it’s none of the MD special ones.

Saw many customers picking a random flowers bunch or plant and think ‘that would do’.

I'm a mum of 2 ( adults with 1 baby each) I see them both regularly and have told DS that I'll see him in the week and to enjoy MD with his GF and DGS. I'm happy with a card or no card- to me it's a fun day when they are little and they make cards at nursery and school but it has become quite commercialised and I don't want my kids wasting money on pointless tat. I don't ever do anything 'special' as its too busy and overpriced!

A colleague told me it’s a game of who gives the biggest bunch of flowers to their mums - especially if they have siblings. Plus last year, a cousin fell out with his sibling as she didn’t buy any flowers for the mum. FFS!

YABU. Love toast in bed and a home-made card.

I love special occasions. I think they brighten up the year and give us an excuse to do something a bit different, eat nicer foods, buy gifts, tell our loved ones what they mean to us etc etc. And yes we can do all these things without special occasions of course. But it's nice to have the reminder and the special day I think.

Those who don't like it, why don't you just not celebrate it? Why does it bother you if others do?

I have never understood this. There are loads of special occasions I don't celebrate, but it would not occur to me for one second to become frustrated or annoyed that others do. That would feel quite controlling .......

Exactly! Then where will this leave us? Even more miserable with nothing left to moan about 😆

As with most "days of celebration" choose what you wish to do with it. Take it or leave it.

My Husband took our son out this morning and came back with £51 of flowers. I’m ashamed to say I went nuts. Every year I ask him
not to buy cut flowers. Every single year. I think I’d prefer if anything a plant I don’t have to watch wither. Every year he buys me cut flowers. £51 was ridiculous and I’d rather he’s have done the school run or made lunch.

So we’ve agreed today no
more commercial “mother/father day presents” we’re just going to do the other persons chores and ensure the child does a nice picture.

Feeling fed up with the constant commercial element. “World book day/Mothers Day/ Xmas in October and Easter in Dec.

I think it should just be a nice excuse to get together and go for a nice meal.

my little one is too young to know what it is. But when it was Father’s Day I also saw it as my chance to show appreciation for the lovely father that DH is to our child but obviously under the guise of being ‘from’ them.

but yes there are Mothers who use it as an excuse to guilt trip if not celebrated appropriately in their eyes that do ruin it.

however, a forum for predominantly mums it probably is going to be a large proportion of the posts.

£51?????? 😬

I brought my kids up to not celebrate me because it’s such. Stupid tradition. We also don’t do Father’s Day or valentines.

I find it so weird when strangers co gratuity me on Mother’s Day though… totally should be banned

Seen MD cards for wife, sister, cousin.

Why?

My ex, being a typical bloke, bought a card at 3:55pm on MD one year and his mum only noticed card said Happy MD wife

Me too - not bothered.
In fact I came away for the weekend alone without realising that included....MD!!!
My kids are grown, my DH is sensible. I'll probably get a phone call or two on the day but won't be fussed if I don't.

@Auburngal not everyone is raised by their mother. Their sister, cousin or aunt (or another relative) may be or was the person bringing them up. So some people like to give a Mother's Day card to that person - but doesn't call them "mum" so a card saying "to mum" doesn't feel appropriate.
Some men also may want to give a card to their wife to acknowledge she is a mother if for some reason the child cannot give a card (for example they sadly have passed away).
It's not exactly a new concept. Cards like those have been sold for years.

I don’t care about it much. Happy with a card. I’m on hols atm so I’m hoping my sons text but if I was at home we don’t make a big deal out of it. We have a good relationship all year round. Some of the fuss on Mothers’ Day is platitudes done out of some sort of duty

Well banners you like. But Mother’s Day in the UK has its origins in the church and nothing to do with actual mothers but being able to visit their mother church.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/religion/religions/christianity/holydays/motheringsunday_1.shtml#:~:text=given%20flowers%20©-,Mothering%20Sunday%20is%20the%20fourth%20Sunday%20of%20Lent.,visit%20their%20mother%20and%20family.

What’s with people going on about the origins? That’s irrelevant as that is really not what it is now for 99% of the population.

@Meowandthen because people say it's just "made up consumerism". But it isn't really.

It’s definitely gotten out of control with gifts and meals out and lots of commercial gain for retailers.

I like the spirit and message of Mother’s Day, though. It reminds people to demonstrate their gratitude for the things their mum does for them. I think the average person doesn’t limit it to one day, but the yearly event does serve as an opportunity to express our love for our mums and is good for mums overall for that reason.

It can cause upset where partners, or children, choose not to show their appreciation, but if anything, it still therefore sheds light on the problem, allowing the mum to address it, if she wants to. And for loving, caring families, hopefully they won’t make that mistake more than once.

I have sympathy with your point of view. Mother’s Day is usually a disappointment for me. If one of my three adult children actually sends me a message I will feel blessed. If I get a gift I’ll probably collapse with shock.