To ask you your biggest regrets in life

[ThefloorisLav]

Just that really, do you have any major regrets from decisions you have made in the past?

Any words of Wisdom?

I regret giving my career up to be a SAHM, meaning I went from being the higher earner to enable DH to build his business. I don't regret a moment of the time I spent with my DC, never will but I do wish that I'd worked part time and made DH share the load more. He's glided through adult life while I've trudged and boy do I resent that at times. I would never be a man's enabler in another life.

Aged 11, listening to my father who said I could never be a vet.

@DottyPencil

And my father who said no to me wanting to to do nurse training.

Not sorting a pension.
Not having another child.
Not moving North.
Feeling I had to push myself into good jobs/career moves that were stressful and what for? No TV happiness

So many things that anre easy to see in hindsight. I try not to have regrets as you can’t change the past but, I do regret not doing scuba diving when given the opportunity in the Maldives.

I am unlikely to go to anywhere like that again. It is the one thing I absolutely wish I’d just, thrown caution to the wind, and done when I could.

Yes, some NHS Trusts do go further and I suspect - or know - they carry out euthanasia in Surrey care settings, against the elderly and vulnerable. On this subject, I wish we'd got Lasting Power of Attorney in Health and Welfare for Mum while she was in a position to grant it - Surrey County Council declared war on us and used that to prosecute it.

Allowing people/society to make me think I was fat and ugly all those years. Hating my body. And feeling like a stranger in it. I look back at photos now and I just think I look lovely.
Not realising what a big impact being brought up by and alcoholic has and nit seeking help sooner, I’m only just starting to realise how to live and have confidence in myself. Where would I be if I had known that earlier!!
Not saving money earlier.

@TragicMuse I lived overseas, I met someone there and had a child and although I’ve had many wonderful experiences, having a family overseas from your own family is sometimes very difficult. I’m not saying either of our choices was the right or wrong one, just saying nothing is simple and the grass is always greener! 😘

Not leaving an abusive partner earlier
Not meeting my now DH sooner
Not learning to drive earlier

Having children
Buying the house we live in now

Spent my whole pregnancy worried about giving birth, couldn't get past the fear. Woke up in the night worrying about it, even considered a termination.

Then had a csection and was absolutely fine bitnshame l wadtwd my pregnancy

but a shame l wasted that was meant to say

Smoking.

Not just joining a graduate training scheme straight after university I drifted a lot instead and am now a loser.

Marrying my stbxh despite my serious doubts. He's an utter twat.

My dad died a few days after being discharged from hospital after having a heart attack. Its awful. I'm so sorry it happened to your dad too

Never being married to the love of my life.
I’ve been married twice.

My only regret is not taking care of my body more. It’s harder to lose weight when you have more to lose!

I don’t regret smoking or drinking, I met some very cool people in the smoking area who I am still friends with (including my husband!).

I don’t regret having children later, I had a blast in my 20s and 30s and got to know myself properly as a person in my own right. I love being a mother, and maybe I would have had more if I started younger, but I wouldn’t be the person I am now or have the family I have.

I’m pretty happy with my life and don’t regret most things as I wouldn’t be where I am now! Yes, some decisions weren’t ideal and I wouldn’t do the same again, but everything has worked out and I’m content.

I have a few

1. Moving into our last house. We were evicted out of the blue which kind of destroyed my husband mentally and took a massive toll on my then 4 year old son. They took our entire deposit because the garden was a bit overgrown and we were left skint due to having to find moving costs and a deposit etc. It was a no fault one too so we can't be blamed for it. I wish we had stayed at the house previous to that one, however I got pregnant with aforementioned 4 year old so we needed space.
2. That I so easily agreed to basically give up any chance of a career or any job other than unskilled minimum wage jobs because I was needed to look after my dss when he wanted to live with us and my husband worked varied shifts.
3. That I didn't get my alsation spayed
4. That I let my dss mother talk to be like shit and never offered to punch her out
5. That I didn't insist on an epidural at 39 weeks when my daughter was in breech. They turned her, she was a week overdue and on the day she was meant to be born I developed the biggest, most painful thrombosed piles ever!! So much hell

Becoming a nurse looking for a way out as covid has made me lose my mojo completely , done it for nearly 20
Years and my job fills me with dread . I've just changed jobs and I still feel the same . I'm sad about it as I started of being enthusiastic but now it's m drained and demoralised

Staying with the father of my kids so my kids had a "proper family" and not being with a man I truly loved. I spent so many years miserable and in a loveless marriage

Who I had a child with.

Having kids with my ex. The kids are great but he didn't support me enough to be a great mum when they were little, he literally left me to do everything and I had no other family support.

I regret giving them a shit dad.

Getting my disordered eating sorted when I was much much younger. My weight has blighted most of my life.

Never experiencing living alone.

Not cutting contact with my sister 7 years ago. She has now had a child who I adore but it's so painful watching her be an awful mother.

Not considering going to uni abroad. The idea of doing so had never occurred to me, I assumed that courses in the Netherlands or Germany (for example) would be taught in Dutch or German and as my only foreign language was GCSE C French that would have been a non-starter. If I had known that there were courses taught in English I might have taken it up (obviously learning the new language once out there).

Instead I ended up at a mediocre British uni taking a course I wasn't really cut out for and ended up dropping out of midway. Looking back, I think that 18 is too soon for most people to know what they really want in life and it would be better to have a few years practice in the real world before choosing a path. I'm envious of schoolfriends who got apprenticeships and eventually did degrees funded by their employers.

We had this exact same post recently.

Here you go OP and everyone else https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5011424-whats-one-of-your-biggest-regrets-and-why?page=2&reply=133158238

Is Mumsnet just churning out click bait threads on repeat these days?