Was I BU to leave the pub after being told off by the manager?

[EmptyTheFrickingBins]

I had booked a table for a group of seven people to celebrate a Ruby wedding anniversary. On arrival to the pub we found the table with our reservation and sat down to wait for the rest of party - this was at 4:30 which was our booked time.

Three other guests were already seated at the table and there was no indication that any other table had been reserved for us.

My parents - who are both elderly and disabled - arrived and I returned to the table with them where we asked the other guests if they'd be happy to share-- there would have been room and we couldn't move because the only free tables were for four or under. This was at 4:45 and we had been waiting for them to finish.

They reacted in a very angry way and stormed off from the table and must have informed the staff on the way out.

I just want to be clear - at no point where we rude or demanding.

We were viewing the menu when a manager in a pink top came over to the table and told us rudely that we shouldn't have asked the other guests to move (again - at no point did we do this), that another table had been reserved for us and we should have spoken to the staff - again none of this was indicated, and only the one table had our name on it!

I felt extremely embarrassed by the interaction - we sat at the table in good faith as it had the reserved sign on with our name.

The woman's attitude was awful and spoiled the night - we ended up leaving because we no longer felt welcome - everyone was looking at us as she told us off!

So much drama that would have been easily resolved and prevented by just checking with staff.

I called a poster a bitch which is why it was deleted.

Apart from that, I have no idea what you're talking about. I haven't posted anything on this thread apart from under this user name.

Troll hunting is against the rules too 🤷

If it was the OP he would have wheeled his parents into the bathroom to have a stare off until the man gave in, wiped his arse and went to complain to reception.

Do you feel better now you've had a nasty dig?

I come on here for a laugh. I found that funny. No particular gripe with you other than your defensiveness tends to encourage it. Some agree with you, some dont. You encouraged the debate.

You are fucking hilarious. Happy now?

Yikes.

OP maybe it's time for a lie down. That poster was clearly taking the micky in a light hearted way.

Honestly after everything that I've been called and accused of in this thread I just don't find more poking funny. 🤷

You should have just waited to be seated after telling them your name when you arrived. Did you hunt round the place to find a table with your name on and whilst they were eating - you all plonked yourself at their table?

How does the colour of her top have any relevance!?

What? Unreasonable?! Yes you were and it clearly stings that others aren't agreeing with your stance on this AIBU! And you're the one talking about nasty digs, whilst actually being quite nasty yourself, in calling someone a "bitch"! Ooh, I think we're getting the picture here!

Yes I called another poster a bitch, but her post about my name was horrible and actually quite hurtful. My last name isn't a typical British one and I get enough digs about it in RL anyway!

Didnt mean to add to your anger @EmptyTheFrickingBins . Honestly just saw the post and tried to picture you walking your parents into that situation and found it very funny.

I dont agree with your POV but i dont want to cause you any more anger than you already have. Apologies

You told us your name was unusual
Hence being dubbed Mrs Unusual Name or Mrs UN

The poster you insulted talked about their OWN experience

Hi OP. I am sorry that you have received snobbery in some of the responses here regarding the choice of venue. Not everyone is blessed with a plethora of options in their locality, nor is everyone blessed with similar budgets. I am also sorry that you have received some nasty comments. There is a difference between bluntly telling someone they are wrong as per the question posed, and be unnecessarily spiteful.

I'm replying once more with the assumption that you have posted a question in good faith, and are genuinely asking whether you were unreasonable.

The overwhelming consensus is that you very much acted against convention and that it is unreasonable to sit at an occupied table, and that you should have sought out a member of staff to inform them of your reservation. On a train, plane or cinema you have a ticket with a seat number. You take yourself there and sit in your allocated seat. A restaurant, even a Hungry Horse, is very different. Names on tables are to guide the staff, not for you to claim your territory.

I hope you are able to accept these responses and adjust your outlook on this issue so that if a similar incident occurs again, you are able to respond in a more measured and culturally accepted manner. Please don't continue to adopt this siege mentality and hang onto the 1% of responses from people that are either confused or playing devils advocate for the sake of their own amusement rather than genuine agreement with you.

They called my name unpronounceable. It's not. It's just unusual. Sorry for finding that hurtful.

OP as someone with an unusual surname which many find hard to pronounce (even though it's really obvious once you hear it), I don't see how someone stating that your name may be unpronounceable is hurtful or warrants them being called a bitch.

My first name isn't even that uncommon but I've been called all sorts by mispronounciation

I don't find it hurtful. It's just a facr

@EmptyTheFrickingBins never have I found the fact that my name is ever pronounced correctly or spelt correctly hurtful....

Get a grip!

How can someone know if your name is difficult to pronounce or not without knowing the name?

45% of people seem to agree with the OP according to the vote. Not 1%.

I think the voting response is awry, the question the OP asked is somewhat ambiguous. ‘Was I being unreasonable to leave the pub after being told off?’ Yes or No? No doubt some people could understand that she felt embarrassed after being told by the manager that her behaviour had been inappropriate, and understood why she left.

She didn’t ask was ‘I being unreasonable to sit at the table with other guests and make them feel uncomfortable’ which by the written responses it appears the most people think she was,

I agree with @SomethingUniqueThisTime I haven't voted because I think YANBU for leaving if manager was rude but YABU for what they did first. Somewhere upthread a while ago I put that the votes would be skewed by this. A lot seems to have happened since then!

Ok, I concede that. More than half the people voted that you were wrong OP, and the vast majority of people who took the time to formulate a written response suggest you acted unreasonably, and have explained why.

Even if it was 50/50, which it isn't, I would suggest that enough people think you acted unreasonably for you to take it on board and bear in mind in your future dealings.

This is actually the most British thing ever 😂

@Remeniss Yep!

OMG we laughed so much when they told us