What is she up to?

[DontVisitCabotCove]

DB, his partner “Jane” & her 2 kids have been staying with me - in my house - after the house they were buying fell through. They had been looking at other properties to buy but have since decided to end their relationship so that’s no longer happening.

Yesterday while my DB and I were out and unbeknownst to me, Jane had an estate agent over to value my house & as he was leaving he told her he’d send her an email with the valuation & they were talking about viewings etc.

Today Jane asked me to give her a letter stating that my brother is living here but wouldn’t tell me why she wanted it & was really unhappy when I said I’d give her a letter saying they were both temporarily staying with me as that’s the actual truth.

What on earth could she be up to? I’m honestly baffled!

Should I tell her that I know about the valuation? Should I tell my DB about all of this?

On one hand I don’t want to get involved in their troubles or make things worse (things are bad enough between them already) but on the other hand I feel I’m being drawn into it as it’s my bloody house she had valued!

If they live with you surely they know you have a ring doorbell!?

These are the key things which made me think the brother was involved. It’s the only way it makes sense.

I think what's most bizzare is that you haven't immediately asked why she would be valuing your house! That's way over stepping the line. I would be complaining to the estate agents that they didn't check who the owner was and I would absolutely tell my brother

I hope op's ok

@Mumofteenandtween very clever, completely agree, annoyed at myself for not being so clever !

If this is the case - write her a letter saying she and your brother are never welcome back and boot her.

Wondering if there’s more to story like your home is an inheritance or he gave money towards it ? Perhaps not but that would make more sense.

I think she needs to leave provided she’s got somewhere to go, your loyalty is to your brother.

Shes Covering All aspects of ' Living Arrangements ' to present to The Child Maintenance Service. Shes going above and beyond with Estate Agent so as to confuse you.
If Your Brother is living with ' Family' and ' rent free' then hes Liable for higher child maintenance payments.
Maybe ' the house really is half his' then shes covered all future claims ( for the house for herself)

I would definitely get a screenshot of the EA and try to find them to ask exactly what was being discussed- maybe look on local websites for photos/ask on local pages?
I would be contacting all local EA in a group email (saving you rewriting/managing multiple emails etc) explaining that you are the sole owner and it is not for sale and giving some info inc quick description of EA (if not photo) asking if EA who visited could get in touch with you - any of the EA might be able to advise you on what the reasons might be and hopefully offer you reassurance.

They are not his kids though, they are from a previous relationship and the kids are currently with their dad per the OP.

And why would he be paying child maintenance for children that aren't his @Vonesk????

The lack of comprehension on this thread is unreal 🙄

From the OP second post to avoid further confusion:

"They aren’t married and the kids aren’t his so I don’t think it’s anything to do with a settlement. They have no joint assets as the house purchase that fell through was going to be their first home together"

This is so bizarre, lots of potential reasons why she could be doing this, but whatever the reason I agree with almost everyone else that you need to change the locks and not let ‘Jane’ in your house again! Also the advice about signing up for land registry alerts on your house is important.

In some ways the most odd thing is that she must know that you have a doorbell camera, but doesn’t seem to have twigged that you will therefore have seen the EA coming and going??

Are you sure you can trust your brother,?

Thank you for all the support and well wishes, I really do appreciate it.

To answer some more questions:

1. Yes I do have a will but my DB is not the executor, it’s actually my solicitor
2. I think I caused some confusion regarding inheritance, my DB will not be inheriting this house but he will be inheriting from elsewhere in my estate to an equal value so he has no reason to be in on any scam regarding this house (even if he was wasn’t getting a bean, he wouldn’t do something like that anyway)
3. I was in hospital on Saturday when the valuation took place and my DB was at work
4. I have contacted my solicitor and have an appointment with them tomorrow morning
5. I have also logged the situation with 101 just to be on the safe side and should get a callback at some point

We’ve found the estate agents (my parents spent the morning going around all the local ones with the still pic), the agent himself wasn’t there but the manager assured them that no official valuation will have been provided in the circumstances they described (there are checks and balances in place) but that I need to go in myself with all my info before I can get specifics. I’m currently in hospital so will try to get there before closing if I can.

Okay so I’ve just gone back and read all the posts….

In the UK it says that you can contest a will or make a claim on an estate (im assuming the same meaning as in Australia - you make a claim because you’re not in the will or you want more than your share).

This is the criteria according to a UK website which would explain maybe why the ex girlfriend wants a letter stating they lived with you.

Who can make an Inheritance Act claim?Those protected by the Inheritance Act include:

• spouses/ civil partners
• children (both minors and adults), including adopted children and step-children
• former spouses/ civil partners (if they haven’t remarried)
• someone who continually cohabited with the person who died for at least two years before their death
• someone who was financially maintained by the person who died.

there’s something fishy going on.

I am upset on your behalf that your precious time is being spent on mumsnet, forced to sleuth about why your home is being valued.

I suppose what sticks out to me is that they have broken up but they’re still together. It’s all very odd.

Much care & warm hugs OP xxx

How long have you known Jane OP? Assume you got along fine with her previously and trusted her enough to have full access to your home.
Did you have any concerns with her beforehand?

How about a name change to Missmarplesharpasatack?

So taking advantage of you being in hospital makes this extra out-of-order. I haven't read the full thread, but the bits I read makes me conclude that you should write no letter for her. No letter, and no further favours whatever. And I read one the previous posters advise you change the locks ASAP and don't allow her back in - absolutely. I wouldn't have her in my house either.

No waiting till end of week pack up her stuff n leave on doorstep. She's committing fraud. Tell her your phoning police. Did your brother know about this. Is this why they got you out house. Very convenient

That's great OP. Sorry for inferring your brother might be up to something (but you just never know). It's a stroke of luck really that you happened to have need to view the doorbell footage, it's now given you the opportunity to head 'Jane' off at the pass whatever her scheme/plan might have been. Best of luck.

Well done you!

OP - I know you say you trust your DB but until you get to the bottom of this I'm still not 100% sure I would, personally. Once you do get to the bottom of this, then go ahead and trust him.

I've just seen and heard of so much stuff re estates/wills in my previous work that nothing at all surprises me, and not even to do with that, marriages etc.

If you haven't done so already boot Jane and her offspring out and block her on everything. You've been too kind already to her.

Wishing you all the best @DontVisitCabotCove you really could do without all this stress and to be able to focus on your own health and well being. It's good that your parents are supportive and that you can be confident all the legal and admin issues in life are attended to.

I really hope you get this sorted as I can't think of any reason why a house guest, who is not related to you, or any other member of your family and with children who aren't related to any member of your family, would have reason to obtain a valuation of your property, even an informal one. It's baffling.

Would police be interested yet though? No crime has been committed technically or only a part of one. Jane could dress it up as being 'helpful' to OP.

For about the millionth time, DB is NOT the children's father and has no financial responsibility towards them!!

See @Primrosecottagelover 's post which is excellent and covers all bases. As I said, working in the law (not a lawyer!) you see and hear of chancers all the time. Working on the most spurious of claims. So doesn't surprise me at all.

I've known of people for years and trusted them and then they turn out to be snakes in the grass (that's unfair to snakes really!).

I really wouldn't trust people that much now, especially as I said where there's the possibility of a gain for them. People have no scruples sometimes.