What is she up to?

[DontVisitCabotCove]

DB, his partner “Jane” & her 2 kids have been staying with me - in my house - after the house they were buying fell through. They had been looking at other properties to buy but have since decided to end their relationship so that’s no longer happening.

Yesterday while my DB and I were out and unbeknownst to me, Jane had an estate agent over to value my house & as he was leaving he told her he’d send her an email with the valuation & they were talking about viewings etc.

Today Jane asked me to give her a letter stating that my brother is living here but wouldn’t tell me why she wanted it & was really unhappy when I said I’d give her a letter saying they were both temporarily staying with me as that’s the actual truth.

What on earth could she be up to? I’m honestly baffled!

Should I tell her that I know about the valuation? Should I tell my DB about all of this?

On one hand I don’t want to get involved in their troubles or make things worse (things are bad enough between them already) but on the other hand I feel I’m being drawn into it as it’s my bloody house she had valued!

Yes, tell your brother.

It's bizarre that someone has ordered a valuation on your property and you haven't immediately asked them why.

It's a clear no brainer.

How did you find out about the valuation? Are they married? Could she be pregnant? Just trying to cover all bases!

Bloody hell. The cheeky cow. I'd definitely ask her about the valuation, and tell your brother as well. How did you find out? I'd also give them a date of when they can get out.

I admire your restraint. I don't know how you found out, but I'd have been asking her what the fuck she thought she was doing having your house valued. It's such a massive intrusion of privacy - showing an estate agent round and discussing holding viewings. It's beyond weird.

If you know the estate agent I’d be having words with them too.

Interesting. And very very rude. I would give her the letter explaining the fully temporary nature of their living arrangements and copy same to your brother.

I would tell her I know about the estate agent and ask her to explain herself.
And because I am a bitch I would tell her to leave at the end of the week, or start paying rent.

Yeah tell your brother and then ask her directly what she's doing.

It is mad behaviour from her.

The only thing that might even vaguely male sense would be if they're looking at a similar style house to yours and want to know if it's been priced right....but that is me being very generous as to her motives.

Why is Jane still staying with you if they have split up?

I’d be really wary of this purely because she obviously has overstepped massively but I can’t think why she would do that unless it was for something sneaky!!! What could it be though!!!

Contact the estate agent tell them your house isn't for sale?

Em .... you're being very placid that someone who has unrestricted access to your house & not even in a relationship with your brother anymore has gone & got your house valued!

Of course tell your brother

Get her out & get your locks changed & seek legal advice & put in writing to the estate agent who valued it that it's not her house to sell !

Also don't engage with her re letter requests etc = your loyalty is to your brother (unless hidden back story) & it sounds like she's trying to screw him over somehow esp as they aren't his children & hes no longer in a relationship with her

Maybe she’s trying to prove that he lives there and may be entitled to some of your property so she can then claim some kind of child support from him? Which is a completely bonkers plan that wouldn’t work anyway.

Definitely tell your brother, and start documenting everything. Put in writing the date that you require her to leave your property. Contact the estate agent to inform them that she is not the owner and should therefore not be sent the valuation.

Do you live in the catchment area of a good school?

How odd. Perhaps she’s trying to find out how much a house would cost either of them if their assets were to be divided up? Or how much she would get for selling her house which is similar? Or is it their house?

Could she want to claim some sort of benefits or sole occupier discount and that’s why she wants something saying DB doesn’t live with her? I would tell DB though and ask what she’s up to.

Is this for real? Why would you not ask her why she’d got a valuation and immediately contact the agent and tell them she doesn’t own and it’s not for sale?

This!

How did you find out?

And why hasn’t Jane left?

It seems obvious to me - she wants to be able today “Fred is adequately housed in a house worth £XXX. Therefore I should get most / all our joint assets to house me and the children.”

Get on the Land Registry website and register for an alert if anyone tries to change anything about the house registration.

I hope she hasn’t got hold of your ID, OP, and is thinking about pretending to be you so she can sell the house? Stranger things have happened …..

Can she claim this if a) it’s not his house and b) they are not his kids?

No, and the op never even said they were married

I mean, she can’t sell the house. I would be worried about her trying to secure some sort of finance against the address maybe??

What @maximist said. Register for free property alerts. I suspect she could be arranging to scam you, selling your property on the sly. It happens! Have you got a large amount of equity in your property?

You need to ask her the next time you and your brother are both in the house, what the fuck she thinks she is doing.