To think you don’t do this when someone is taking you out for a meal…?

[greedyguts18]

DH took his sister out for dinner to celebrate her birthday at the weekend - it was a nice restaurant so he knew it wouldn’t be cheap but his sister ended up ordering the most expensive food items on the menu & had 8 cocktails at £20 a go!!!

The meal ended up costing hundreds and hundreds of pounds - so much so that I’ve had to bail him out so he could get through the rest of the month.

If someone is treating me to a meal, I always make sure I don’t choose the most expensive thing on the menu - surely this is just basic manners ?!

AIBU? Or was she really grabby to do that ?

I put yabu but only because I don’t choose the cheapest thing - but mid range end - not the most expensive and I’d NEVER order 8 cocktails. But just because you’ve been taken out shouldnt mean you eat bread and butter for dinner 🤣

Hardly the point, an expensive place would charge £15 for a cocktail, never spent £20 on one so god only knows where they went. Still don't believe anyone could drink 8 🤥🤥

Fair enough ordering what you want to eat but I wouldn't even have ordered 1 cocktail at £20! Very rude of her.

He was definitely out with her as she posted about it all over Instagram ! I was awake when he got home, he wasn’t drunk but really taken aback at all the cocktails she had but she’s a big character so no one ever says no to her.

I totally get what other people are saying about if you’re being treated you order what you want food wise. I personally would not choose the most expensive thing on principle but do appreciate what others are saying

If I had drunk 8 cocktails I would have very quickly thrown up the very expensive food!

@crumblingschools exactly !! That’s why I’m annoyed tbh

Presumably he's known her all their lives, so knew there was a fair possibility of this, if it's true. I'd bet there's another version of this story

I think there's an assumption that a birthday treat you can order something a bit more expensive than normal, and he must have consented to her doing so. He could have chosen somewhere less pricey if he thought she has this tendency. I think it's a bit rude, but he probably willingly did it at the time to please her, now is suffering buyers remorse as after the event he's broke and you are not happy. Hopefully this will be the lesson learned for him.

I expect your husband made a thing of wanting to treat her and understandably, she’s taken that as she can order what she wants. It’s not really your place to judge of what she wants is acceptable or not, we all like different things. If she’s been encouraged to have a good time and your DH has let her believe that it’s no problem and he can afford it, she’s not the one that caused the problem.

So he can normally speak up for himself but chose not to? I don't think you've had the full story

The food is ok I think, but she should have paid for her own drinks and no way I'd pay for 8 cocktails at £20 each.

£20 a cocktail. £20 for one drink. That's so steep! YANBU

Is he covering for something? Hundreds on drinks is pushing it for even the cheekiest of fuckers

Your DH needs assertiveness training.

You can politely say after, say the second cocktail, oh sis I'd budgeted X for your birthday meal and we've already gone over, so I'll pay for this one but any more you'll have to pick up the tab for, ok?

Then I would have just paid the bill and then ordered my drinks separately.

Learn from mistakes. I wouldn't be buying her a present for a few years to balance it out.

Yikes, that's over 20 units of alcohol, she must've been paralytic, no? Unless she's very big, and a big habitual drinker!

Did he take her to a strip club?? 😮

Seems completely wanker behaviour to deny someone a pay rise purely on ordering food on an night out.

It reminds me a bit of that team from Barclays who all got sacked for (legitimately) being out on expenses at a swish London restaurant and ordering wine into the many thousands. Not on the same scale, of course, but that man has shown himself to be a bit of a chancer/opportunist. If you can’t trust him to show a bit of restraint/good manners when he’s being watched, what’s he like when he’s not? Okay, denying him a pay rise solely on that basis is probably a bit extreme - but the negative judgement is perfectly valid.

Have you seen the receipt?

What cocktails did she order?

What food did they order?

I smell a gigantic fish.

This is my thought. I think he did go out with his sister, but I don't think that's where all the money went.

You have no idea what kind of cocktails they were! They could have had just 1 shot of alcohol in each, so there's no way you can state that it's over 20 units of alcohol.

Not excusing it, or anything, and I couldn't imagine drinking that much especially at someone else's expense. but I felt I had to pull you up on this statement.

If it was an expensive restaurant, as indicated by your OP, then it is doubtful that they would continue to serve someone eight cocktails.

I like a drink (and I've had plenty of practice!) but I would be verging on unconscious way before the eighth.

Food is fine although if I knew money was tight I'd order something cheaper. 2 drinks seems reasonable, no more unless the host offers.

£20 cocktails with one shot? 🤣

Just to let everyone know that I am more than capable of drinking 8 cocktails in one sitting. Otherwise your SIL is cheeky bugger. Maybe not so much with the food but the drink was very rude. Where on god's earth do cocktails cost £20 each anyway?

It's rude and it's the reason I hate people buying me dinner. I don't want to be limited to cheaper food options so I always refuse the offer, it's very simple.