the petition going round about dads in hospitals

[strawberryswizzler]

just me who is absolutely against this idea? i’ve had 2 c-sections. one emergency, one elective. could barely sit myself up to feed my baby nevermind walk properly etc, i felt so vulnerable. the thought of being in a 4 bed bay separated only by curtains with random men who could be anyone makes me feel ill. anyone else??

Agree.
Staffing levels in maternity wards are critically low, something has to change asap. In the short term to save lives there needs to be changes. Although our local hospital have been doing this since at least 2000.

With the Tories? No chance.

The money is there, whether or not they spend it on maternity care is dependant entirely on whether or not we demand it. We're wasting time debating whether or not we need men on wards, because shit levels of care have been so normalised we don't even know what adequate care should look like.

It won’t though.
Campaign if you wish but in the short term there needs to be a solution.

But is not a universal solution.

I said there needs to be a solution in the short term.
No one here has suggested a universally accepted and viable one yet.

My local hospital has to have a special entrance built to the postnatal wards and strict entry - the had been a few cases where fights had broken out between the men who claimed to be the babies father and then the rest of the family had pitched in - imagine the night staff trying to deal with that at the end of open visiting which man can stay.
I agree with pp overnight relative or friend in single rooms or selected bays only.

I don't agree that it can be called a solution in any way. At best, it's a partial substitute to HCP for some women, at worst it is detrimental to the wellbeing of others.

Doctors and Surgeons, certainly not Midwives (it was a Midwife's fault). Hence why I wouldn't feel safe being left with just Nurses and Midwives on the ward and would want the support of my birth partner if I was to do it again.

I’d have to Agree to disagree and go for temporary solution until safe staffing levels can be achieved to prevent death.
This is Mumsnet
I Agree @Minymile

I am yet to hear of any woman being attacked on a post natal ward by a father of one of the babies. Also if your worst nightmare is a random man eyeballing you breastfeeding what on earth are you going to do when you need to breastfeed in public later on?

Glasgow by any chance?

There are pages and pages of women here detailing their negative experiences of men on post natal wards.

If your threshold for something being unacceptable is waiting until a women is attacked by a stranger, then I’m afraid your bar is set too low.

Are you serious? I must say, if your best arguments are showing contempt for the safety and dignity of post natal women, you might want to rethink them if you want to explain why it's fine to have men on wards overnight.

You are so right, why should women recovering from childbirth expect to not have to deal with sexual harassment and inappropriate staring from pervert men while in hospital. I mean they're going to have to deal with perverts when they leave the hospital so may as well get used to it straight away.

Right?

I think it’s important need to sidestep personal experiences and appreciate at the moment there is no solution other than to allow partners to offer care

-if a new mum has complex medical needs,
-if there aren’t enough private rooms available
-because there’s a baby to look after too
-because staffing levels are dangerously low
-and to prevent the death of mother or/ and baby

It is what is
and hospitals are having to balance want over need. Life over death.

No my bars not low, not allowing any fathers in the ward because of a fear of them looking at you and overactive imagination paranoia they will all attack you is crazy.

We also don't live in India or Africa, where family support at the bedside is expected and required. We should have proper medical care.

This is a Trojan Horse. Seek it in through maternity and then expect family to do all the care for ill people in all kinds of environments.

Ah, so a midwife tried to kill you, then 'doctors snd surgeons' (obstetricians ARE doctors AND surgeons) 'saved you' - with no assistance from midwives?

I promise im trying hard to word this without sounding patronising.... but it does sound like you need a proper debrief on the events and some counselling to help you process them. Your reference to Lucy Letby is very telling.

This. It's a slippery slope.

Good response to a ridiculous post. Talk about setting the bar low!

I can only assume the poster has never breast fed from this comment.

If there are any dads here.
Heres some advice on dos and don’t from a midwife

Close.... Edinburgh 😂an hour and a bit away!

@rainingsnoring I breastfed from hospital, for 2 years. On the bus, at the bus stop, in cafes, on the street. Whenever my baby needed feeding and no I didn't use a cover up because he refused to feed if I did. If any men were leering I was too busy to notice. It's a strange thing to get worked up about and even if people do look, it doesn't mean they're about to pounce on you.

First rule of Buddhism, don't be a dick.