Do I just give up? Am I just destined to be fat

[Sianholby]

Just coming in here as I’m just feeling down at the moment. I’m perimenopausal, just started HRT and hate the way I look.
I swim and go on our home cross trainer twice a week. I work full time and have three kids. We eat relatively healthily and I’m trying to cut down my carbs.

i just look like a whale, my belly sticks out further than my breasts. I can just can’t shift this weight.
iVe attached a photo of me currently, I want to lose the belly and the fat below my breasts that sticks out. Any tips as exercising three times a week around work and children and walking almost everywhere just isn’t doing it

Psychiatry apparently. He's not a dietician

Upon graduation from medical school, and having become disillusioned by psychiatry, Mosley joined a trainee assistant producer scheme at the BBC in 1985

He studied psychiatry. He is not a qualified doctor.

I have literally struggled with weight too which is why I am offering my experience and support to someone in the same boat. You’re on one tonight and I’m sorry you’re not feeling good about yourself. No one is laughing at anyone for weight struggles.

If the approach you’re so incandescent about is so good then I assume you are a healthy weight and feeling great right now. I don’t know many significantly overweight muscular healthy people, if you are then great, and if you’re happy with yourself as you are then even better.

oP said that exercising a lot isn’t getting her results, and lots will agree that that’s because calorie deficit is the only way to lose weight. If exercise alone was enough she wouldn’t be struggling now.

@specialsauce

Dr Michael Mosley - British Television Journalist, Producer and Presenter

Michael studied PPE at Oxford and then became an investment banker...before realising that this really wasn’t the industry for him...so he retrained as a doctor.

After studying medicine at the Royal Free Hospital in London and qualifying as a doctor...he realised that this wasn’t really the industry for him either!

Michael joined the BBC as a trainee assistant producer and over the ensuing 25 years has made numerous science and history documentaries for the BBC, first behind the camera and more recently as a presenter.

https://www.ifst.org/events/michael-mosley#:~:text=Michael%20studied%20PPE%20at%20Oxford,the%20industry%20for%20him%20either!

You advised the OP to 'stop exercising'.

Are you completely happy that she should do this?

I think it's shit advice. I stand by my original post.

I am not 'deranged' or having a 'bad day'. I just can't sit here and watch people sanctimoniously dishing out horrendous advice. Especially to someone who is actually already doing really fucking well.

OP the other thing I’ve seen that has worked for others is Zoe. It is expensive though and it wasn’t great for me but I do know others who say they struggled for years and now that they follow a Zoe approach it’s the first time in their life they aren’t calorie counting or constantly hungry / miserable. It helped me to realise how different each of our bodies are - so what would work for me might not fit you. Understanding the types of foods that send me into a sugar spike and which keep a good balance was helpful. I think I will incorporate what I learned from Zoe now that im trying to maintain but the reason it didn’t work for me is I didn’t lose weight doinG it and that was the main priority for me which is why I wanted something I’d see results with and fasting was amazing for that.

I'm not sure if I'm missing something but I don't get the level of nastiness directed @specialsauce

Actually I said ‘pause on exercising for now, exercise alone won’t help you to shift weight’.

I stand by that. Funny you call me sanctimonious - assuming because I say it worked for me whilst you’re still swearing at people online without having found something that works for you.

calling my advice ‘shit’ is rude. It just is. There’s no need to talk to people like that.

if exercise alone was working for OP then she wouldn’t be posting on a forum upset about not shifting weight despite her best efforts. It’s not sanctimonious to share stories and suggestions.

Fair do's.
It reads everywhere else, except for the BBC pages (his biggest promoters) that he studied psychiatry but switched to journalism in his 20's and is not registered as a doctor. He is definitely not a registered doctor. He clearly never practised as a doctor. He basically just graduated from medical school then switched career to journalism.

Advising people not to exercise is pretty bad advice tbf. I, too, have seen some clangers rolled out on these threads. Things like "just treat yourself" and "you don't need to restrict yourself". There's the phenomenon of the recent emphasis on the importance of diet being, by general consensus, morphed into something unrecognisable that's being repeated on most weight loss forums as gospel. I do see where @specialsauce is coming from on this.

The emphasis is on shifting focus away from exercise to significant calorie deficit. Exercise alone won’t help to shift weight. If you disagree, that’s fine: I’m off to do a 10k run tomorrow having shifted 2 stone in a few weeks and now my knees don’t hurt and i actually enjoy running again. Was totally worth switching to walking and light exercise for a bit: if you disagree that’s fine, but you won’t find me swearing at you and calling your opinions shit.

Yeah I'm significantly overweight and have a lot of muscle - I lift heavy weights and do spin classes regularly

I didn’t find short term fasting affected my muscle or ability to resume more strenuous exercise after; if anything being lighter has made it easier. Getting much faster times etc now but I guess depends on priorities. For me, even if I had lost a bit of muscle short term, I reasoned my priority was getting to a healthy weight as the way I was eating was going to kill me faster than anything else.

Yeah I wouldn't fast myself - consultant advised against it for hashimotos and my other medical issues
I just try and exercise as much as I can and eat well and my weight is my weight

This was 'advice' that MM originally gave to people who had developed type 2 diabetes or were dangerously pre-diabetic. It was supposed to be a short term, 6 week, reset.

It seems to have been recently rebranded as a way to lose weight for anyone and everyone.

I am not a dietician or a weight loss expert but 800 cals per day is an extremely low amount of calories for anyone who is exercising regularly.

Don't do anything that puts your health at risk. Extreme calorie deficits could leave you malnourished. Just cut out most of the rubbish out of your diet, walk at any opportunity and be as active as you can.

Resistance training will build your strength and anyone can do it. I've always hated pilates and yoga but I've tried it for 3 weeks on you tube in my front room and already feel more flexible and stronger.

Just do whatever you like that is active - I've even started marching on the spot whilst watching eastenders!

In case anyone is thinking of extreme calorie restriction on the 'advice' of 'not a doctor' Michael Moseley:

''In 2021, Mosley presented a three-part series, Lose a Stone in 21 Days for Channel 4. On the programme Mosley asserted that people can lose a stone in 21 days by calorie restriction to only 800 calories a day. This advice is considered dangerous by medical experts and the programme received a backlash on social media platforms.[11] Beat, a UK charity supporting those affected by eating disorders, stated that "the programme caused enough stress and anxiety to our beneficiaries that we extended our Helpline hours to support anyone affected and received 51% more contact during that time".[12]''

I do agree that different things work for different people, and also get frustrated at things posted on weight loss threads as absolute truth.

Eg for me, fasting gives me migraines so that's no use. Cutting out carbs/keto etc has the same effect. HIIT is something I have to be very careful with due to asthma.
My body doesn't naturally carry much muscle, and I lose it easily if I were to just cut calories. So if I just do very low calorie for too long, I end up having to adjust my maintenance lower and lower, which means the likelihood of gradually gaining weight back increases.
I don't lose lots of weight if I exercise, but I eat far better, because I do exercise that I enjoy and it's sociable. Without it I'm miserable, and have more time on my hands, and I'm far more likely to look for solace in food. So if I were to cut out exercise to focus on calorie restriction I'd struggle to last a week. Whereas I know other people who if they exercise their appetite increases significantly so they'd struggle not to overeat.

Not saying the above to contradict anyone on the thread but just an example to show individual differences. Many of the things I see on Mumsnet that people are adamant will work, would just not work for me. Everyone has to find their own route.

Literally the same here. I LOVE intermittent fasting and I eat what I want! I never restrict myself and mix up my eating windows so i can have variety!

I always thought this diet was for pre-diabetic - as in “Yes, it’s not advised eating a mere 800 calories a day but it’s short term to prevent you from getting Type 2 diabetes which would be much worse than such a restricted diet”. Is his diet for anyone or does he make it clear it’s a short term fix if pre-diabetic or obese which would pose more of a risk to health than such a restricted diet?

I just have under a stone to lose after having my baby a few months ago. I can usually lose fast through a reasonable deficit and some exercise (but not loads) but it’s much harder this time round. FWIW, I’ve never fasted and my metabolism seems to be fast when eating often. But so many swear by fasting. Everyone really is different.

Do you also fast for 36hr, like the PP you’ve quoted? 😵‍💫 Wondering if that’s what you meant by “Literally the same here.” That’s extremely restrictive in my book…

I'm in my 50s and do similar exercise. I need to be on 1200 calories to loose weight. I loose weight slowly on that but don't feel hungry and can include the odd day when I have more. Generally though I'm strict. I make sure I eat plenty of protein. I don't snack apart from occasionally having a piece of fruit or something at 4 or 5. Otherwise it's three meals a day

Cauliflower rice is brilliant.

MFP is brilliant for dieting. I've always got to watch my protein intake. It's easy to eat to little.

I have magnum mini icecream bars in the freezer - they are tasty and only 160'ish. They probably should have any part in a healthy dieting diet but I enjoy them a lot.

It isnt possible to guess exactly how many calories you need to eat to loose weight so you should just do trial and error. Keep decreasing your calories until you start to loose weight. Take it slowly.

My day today. It's a bit short of fibre today tbh

Slimfast ( good protein) @ 200

Egg yolk, naked salad, brown seeded bread. @ 300

Fish roasted 200g, cauliflower rice, various veg, soy sauce and spices @ 400

One of those Scandinavian Skyr type yoghurts (90cal). 200g raspberries/ strawberries @ 160 all in

Left over calories for milk in coffee etc

800 cals for diabetes comes from the Newcastle study, there's been quite a bit of research around it and it hasn't been proved dangerous. GPs have been prescribing exante.

You've done the hard things

• recognised you need to loose weight
• decided to do something about it

Small habits make big changes

Yeah I agree - for type 2 diabetes - or pre-diabetic people. If medically advised that's totally fine.

But people are now using the 800 cal a day as a mantra for weight loss. On many weight loss threads including this one, extreme calorie restriction is being promoted by various posters to people they have no idea about. It's wrong and it's dangerous.

I honestly don't know if 'he' is promoting this or people on mumsnet are just taking the 800 cal a day out of the diabetic context and advising it on mumsnet to people who could be harmed by lowering their calories to that extent.

You've just had a baby - congrats! You're gonna need that baby weight to get you through some long nights, lots of carrying and rocking, pram pushing, never sitting down'ness of being a new mama.

Don't worry about needing to lose anything right now - enjoy your baba, eat healthily and go on lot's of spring pram walks - you'll be fine.