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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nursery have given DS cake

187 replies

Hmmwhatyousay · 15/02/2024 21:40

i have said I don’t want him having puddings and to have fruit instead. Last week he had cake all week (only just found out on pick up yesterday). They’ve said it was an oversight. Would you be annoyed about this? He’s 12 months.

OP posts:
IwishIdidntlikesugar · 15/02/2024 22:35

Mmmm cake

SErunner · 15/02/2024 22:35

In fairness to the OP, I wouldn't want my daughter having cake every day. Our nursery have a cake or equivalent on one day of the week. Also, dietary instructions are very important for them to know and follow due to allergies etc so it would concern me that their system to safeguard this hadn't worked as presumably your preferences would be identified in the same as allergy/dietary requirements. That said, I personally wouldn't be asking a nursery to follow my food preferences - if I wasn't happy with the menu I wouldn't have chosen that nursery. I wouldn't fly off the handle about this but I would highlight to them they might want to check their processes and ask if they have any intention to improve the variety of pudding options across the week.

SwordToFlamethrower · 15/02/2024 22:36

FlyingSoap · 15/02/2024 22:13

What do you think will happen if he eats cake?

Unpopular opinion - If you restrict cake now, he will desire it more once he knows what it is. It will backfire. If you make cake ‘no big deal’ just as you would banana, broccoli or jacket potato… then he will learn that all foods are ok in moderation and shouldn’t overeat anything high in sugar or fat in the future. Don’t put foods on a pedestal. Serving dessert at the same time as main meal is even better, apparently & reduces the chance of disordered eating or sneaking foods in the future. I’m sure the nursery know what they’re doing.

Edited

Bull. My son is 20. He was restricted with sweets, cake, chocolate and was fed good, jome cooked food.

He doesn’t eat them now because "they taste absolutely rank". He is lean, muscular and eats very healthily. He is also an amazing cook himself.

Giving a baby sugar is insanity. No childcare setting should be doing that. I say that as an ex childminder.

letsstaylight · 15/02/2024 22:38

Just wait til your kid get a mobile phone. 😂😂

Mrspatmoresspoon · 15/02/2024 22:41

SwordToFlamethrower · 15/02/2024 22:36

Bull. My son is 20. He was restricted with sweets, cake, chocolate and was fed good, jome cooked food.

He doesn’t eat them now because "they taste absolutely rank". He is lean, muscular and eats very healthily. He is also an amazing cook himself.

Giving a baby sugar is insanity. No childcare setting should be doing that. I say that as an ex childminder.

Show quote history

We aren’t sure that the cake had sugar in it.

With respect yours is just one perspective my SIL and BIL defo contributed to my nieces eating disorder and weight problem with their restriction

Just reread your op, cake every day isn’t good. Have you had any issues with the food at the nursery before?

TinkerTiger · 15/02/2024 22:42

I would report them to ofsted and the police.

marrybarry · 15/02/2024 22:48

@TinkerTiger and the local MP and the armed forces and Santa

Hyppogriff · 15/02/2024 22:48

Hahahahahaha get over it

crumblingschools · 15/02/2024 22:54

Was it cake or pudding?

crumblingschools · 15/02/2024 22:56

if it is like cakes/pudding provided at school they will be using fruit to sweeten it. They are not the tasty treats you might have at home

daysfilledwithdappledlight · 15/02/2024 22:59

I don't think it makes any difference what the food was, the point is you asked them not to do something and they ignored your request and did it anyway. I wouldn't feel happy about my requests being disregarded, it's not for them to decide if they agree with them or not...

KnickerlessParsons · 15/02/2024 23:01

Cakes aren't puddings. They didn't give him pudding. YABU.

PurpleChrayn · 15/02/2024 23:03

🙄

AndThatWasNY · 15/02/2024 23:05

Why the fuck does a nursery give cake or puddings everyday? Surely we've learnt from all the obese kids running around that this isn't OK.

FlyingSoap · 15/02/2024 23:07

SwordToFlamethrower · 15/02/2024 22:36

Bull. My son is 20. He was restricted with sweets, cake, chocolate and was fed good, jome cooked food.

He doesn’t eat them now because "they taste absolutely rank". He is lean, muscular and eats very healthily. He is also an amazing cook himself.

Giving a baby sugar is insanity. No childcare setting should be doing that. I say that as an ex childminder.

Show quote history

It’s not bull at all, it’s what many dieticians are saying. Glad your son’s okay though.

AndThatWasNY · 15/02/2024 23:07

SallyWD · 15/02/2024 22:21

Honestly, I think it will do him more harm in the long run to deny him certain foods that he's sees everyone else eat. I'll never forget my friend who was brought up on a very strict no sugar, vegan diet. As soon as she was out of sight of her parents she'd be buying sweets and sausage rolls! You may not be so extreme but you won't be doing him any favours by denying him cake. Everything in moderation.

He's 12 months old! He can be fobbed off a satsuma.

AndThatWasNY · 15/02/2024 23:09

FlyingSoap · 15/02/2024 23:07

It’s not bull at all, it’s what many dieticians are saying. Glad your son’s okay though.

Show quote history

Dietinians are not saying that at all. In fact they are saying we should be cutting most UPFs out of babies lives.

DragonGypsyDoris · 15/02/2024 23:11

Your first child, perchance?

ColleenDonaghy · 15/02/2024 23:11

AndThatWasNY · 15/02/2024 23:09

Dietinians are not saying that at all. In fact they are saying we should be cutting most UPFs out of babies lives.

Show quote history

I doubt dieticians are using the UPF phrasing.

kaytyy · 15/02/2024 23:11

When at nursery mine didn't have cake until about 18 months old as it sounds like we did similar in saying fruit / healthier deserts only while so young.

The fact you have not been listened to is not good at all and is have a moan tbh maybe even an email as they are not following instructions. Yes it's only a cake but they are showing they don't listen.

My nursery approached me when sc reached an age where they noticed dc was not wanting fruit but what others had- I felt really impressed with this.

ApplesinmyPocket · 15/02/2024 23:11

TinkerTiger · 15/02/2024 22:42

I would report them to ofsted and the police.

I would go further. I'd invoke the European Court of Rights. Cake! oh my god!

Honestly - surely this must be the most MN problem EVER?

Actually I'm leaning towards this being a wind-up, or MNHQ lackeys posting frothable topics on a slow day 😉

Reugny · 15/02/2024 23:17

SwordToFlamethrower · 15/02/2024 22:32

I'd be beyond furious!!!! If he had an allergy, then an oversight could be deadly.

I'd be reporting them to ofsted.

My son had a terrible lactose intolerance and it turned out the nursery were giving him dairy.

I lost TWO jobs because i was constantly missing work to pick him up for being ill.

Do not let this go, at all. Giving babies junk food is NOT ok.

The OP child doesn't have an allergy, intolerance or religious issue so she is over the top.

And yes my DD has an intolerance, which was discovered when she was 3, but luckily unlike me doesn't have an allergy as well (yet).

Oh and she can eat some cakes but not others, so is very used to eating just fruit instead.

PeopleAreWeird · 15/02/2024 23:23

Babies and Children need some sugar / Fat in their diet

Why wouldnt you allow him to be the same as his friends ??

Lifeinlists · 15/02/2024 23:28

@SwordToFlamethrower
Do not let this go, at all. Giving babies junk food is NOT ok.

Your definition of junk food is a piece of cake?

Your son had lactose intolerance, OP's child just has an intolerant mother. He won't get ill from cake.

Sleepysleepasap · 15/02/2024 23:28

HNRTFT but my granddaughter is vegetarian as her Mum has requested. We definitely suspect that she has been given meat accidentally. It’s not a reason to get angry. The lovely people that work there are doing their best and being paid a rubbish wage. Pick your battles.

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