House issues with ex husband

[fairycakes77]

I just need to know if I'm being unreasonable with my request.

I split up with my ex husband of 7 years at the beginning of last year, I fell out of love with him and ultimately ended up cheating on him. He left the marital home we bought together and my new partner moved in with me.

He has since started a relationship with someone and they've been together 8 months from what I know.
I've just had a baby with my new partner and because I am not on maternity leave, I can no longer afford to pay the mortgage on the house.

We are trying to sell the house and have been all this time, it is agreed I get back what I put into it which is £35k.

It was also agreed in a contract that should the house not sell by February this year (so now) by which my baby would be due then he would move back in to the house and pay the mortgage in full.

He has done this and is paying everything to do with the house on his own (he is well off) but he has moved his new girlfriend in with him too which I am far from happy about.

I don't know her, she could be ruining the house and I'm worried if she did anything then I wouldn't get my £35k I am owed.

He goes away on business sometimes up to a week at a time, I have asked him that no one is allowed to stay in the house when he is not there.

I asked him to check the insurance and the insurance says that it is fine but it still doesn't sit right with me.

I'm just not comfortable with someone else living in my asset.

I don't think I am being unreasonable but
AIBU?

If your new dp who you left your ex for can live in the house your ex new girlfriend can. Yabu. Unless this a reverse I feel your ex has had a lucky escape.

I guess you just realised that the grass wasn't greener on the other side after all and your ex can afford the house and lifestyle you wanted whereas your new catch can't.

Why would she do anything "spiteful" to the house when it would affect him too? Clearly spiteful thoughts are coming from one party in this whole scenario and I don't think it's from your ex or his new partner.

Very unreasonable. You know it.

Wow OP you cheated on your husband moved your affair partner in, had a baby with AF and are now annoyed Ex might say something about you to his new girlfriend……… !
Speechless

Yabu, it is ok for you to move your new partner (you cheated on your husband with) in your house. But not ok for your ex husband to have his partner moving with him in the house, that is a bit rich.

I'm confused about your other thread OP?

I mean the one from May 2022 where you say you've been with your DP for 3 years?

This HAS to be a reverse

Yeah OK right now, maybe she is getting her Mafia friends around for a swingers party and may damage a light bulb?

If this is true then it’s karma

If your ex husband is well off, why don't he give you the £35K to get rid of you once and for all. When I separated from mu husband (he was the one who cheated), I bought his share of the house to get rid of him, I don't have a huge sallary jhad to remortgage but it was a relief not having him telling me anymore it is his house.Unfortunately due to the kids, I still have contact with him.

You reap what you sow.

You didn't have to cheat on him, did you? You could have left the relationship first.

Now you're getting your knickers in a twist because he's moved his new girlfriend into the house where YOU moved in the man you cheated with! You sound like a complete narcissist.

But you moved your new partner, that you cheated with when you were married, into the marital home with you? I think you've forfeited any right to complain about his partner living there to be honest!

But what would she actually do???

I've used my friends account so it's not outing, she's told me about Mumsnet so I just wanted to see if iabu because I genuinely didn't think I am.

She thinks im being unreasonable if im honest.

You're not concerned about her devaluing the house. You're pissed off that she's in it, and you're not.

This can't be real?!

You don't trust him anymore?! Fuck me sideways, are you having a laugh?!

Unless she smears the walls habitually with goats blood or accidentally burns the place down due to her Satanic Worship rituals, I really wouldn't be overly concerned.

Oh it's real! I'm not happy he's got her in the house.

It's not my fault he can't buy me out and it's not my fault it's not selling so why do I have to put up with him having her in there.

Neither of us want the house anymore i stayed out of the kindness of my heart so he could move on but situations change and I couldn't afford to live there anymore. It doesn't mean he should have someone else living there!

Can't he do a rental contract or something? Have tenants insurance? There must be something I can do to stop this from happening in my house!

It’s just as much his house as yours - you’re just pissed off that you can’t afford it and you’re jealous that he’s moved on and isn’t pining for you

Oh it's real! I'm not happy he's got her in the house.
But you and your shaggy buddy can live there?
Oh petal... poor poor lamb...

If this is real, wouldn't the ex husband be rather enjoying himself? Sounds like it

@fairycakes77 what did you put in place while your new DP lived there, presumably that would suffice.

Bonkers. Nobody is that self absorbed and selfish. Surely.

Yes exactly OP, did you have a rental contract or tenants insurance when you moved the other man in?