Inheritance -Family money?

[ZekeZeke]

Example:
Married 25 years, no mortgage both work.
2 adult children in University still living at home.(both working part time).
Widowed MIL dies. DH inherits £200,000
Is this family pot money?
DH Money?
DH and DW money?
DH ans DC money?

I’m in the same situation now, I’ve inherited the money. There is no question to me that it’s for the family pot.

What's the point in that ?

I think that legally it remains DH's money only as long as it is left untouched where it is. As soon as it's moved or used during the marriage, it becomes marital property.

Agree, I find that odd as well.

Definitely joint money for us. My DH inherited a relatively small amount and we bought a large glass sliding door with it 😂. I’m in line for a fairly substantial inheritance (which I’ll be devastated to receive due to what it means), and we’ll do something meaningful with it and then something boring, like paying off our mortgage.

but we’ve always had one pot.

When I inherited money I was happy to share it with DH and my boys. Dh insisted it was my money and I didn't and shouldnt have to share it.
I insisted that seeing it was my money I was going to share it with him!🤣

Unless there's abuse/financial abuse/issues in the marriage, I generally think inherited money is family money.

If you don't love your spouse enough to share the the bits that make life that much easier/more comfortable, what's the point of being in it together at all?

Family money. Realistically what use is £200k to just one person in a family unit.

Though I've seen enough threads on here where the man has all the flash staff while the wife and kids are in rags...

I love the idea that future generations will benefit from our current investments, this is why we have set up trusts.

What’s the point in making sure your family have financial stability? Have a house to live in which is paid for? Are you being facetious?

I think the question is what’s the point in passing it down and no one spending it?

Thank you all, some very interesting replies.
I probably should have included a poll.
MIL was an amazing woman, adored by everyone.
She wouldn't have felt the need to include grandchildren in the will as she knew DH's moral compass being what it is, he would set money aside for them.

I was just interested in how others saw the inheritance as I've had a few wink wink nudge nudge from my side of the family about how rich I'm going to be. When I've pulled them up and said, "well it's DHs money not mine I was met with quizzical looks.

Just to note, they are aware of the amount, I don't go around gossiping but its very clear as the house was sold, anyone can see the €value.

DH is a very sensible person and only ever has our best interests at heart. He plans on maxing out his pension as he is retiring in the not too distant future. That will benefit us both. He will look after the kids and put money away for them.

Yeah, that was in our marriage vows. If either of us inherit in future, it will be family money. Salary is family money. Everything is family money.

I really don't understand why it is not seen automatically as family money that is discussed as such and then decisions are made as to how it is spent/invested or split if some are to go to DC's. I can see that DH may want a strong say in what happens which is completely fine and understandable as the funds have come from his family.

I can't see how anyone in a long-term truly dedicated relationship where you've built a family and a life together could see it any other way.

You both have been working to create the best life possible for your family I assume and this is just another aspect that goes towards your shared goal.

exactly, I can't see how a marriage can work any other way.

I just don't see the point in passing down huge sums of money and never spending any
But any inheritance I get will go to making

our life easier And will mean we don't have e to worry about finances

DH's money. We don't share finances though.

@ZekeZeke don't you view the funds your DH will put away for the children as coming from both of you not just your DH?

This very much depends on the circumstances.

For eg.

My first marriage, we got together as teenagers, didn't have a pot to piss in, so we both came to the table with zero, got married, had 2 kids, all money pooled and shared, gradually made our way up in the world and ended up quite well off : this money would have gone straight in to the family pot.

My second marriage, we got together in our late 30's. He brought nothing to the table, I had a house. Got married in our 40's. No children together. Finances have never been shared, as I knew that I had to protect my house. In that case, inheritance would be seen as belonging to the person who inherited. When my Mum died, I did get some money and most of it was paid into the mortgage. But I did pay off DH's car loan as well. DH stands to inherit a huge sum, and I guess I'd hope he might treat me to something, but the money will be his.

But having financial security and a house to live in without a mortgage means they can spend their own wages on living. It removes the worry about money? They can still spend their wages on holidays and cars etc whilst leaving the capital alone??

No because its not coming from me. Its coming from grandmother/grandfather and DH.

Why? My mum was adamant that she wanted me to enjoy the money I inherited when she died, and firmly believed that money was to be enjoyed while you're alive. I've spent some of the money I inherited from her on improvements to our house and have bought new carpets, a huge shed for my husband, electrical appliances, and paid off my daughter's student loan. Once my back problem has been resolved, then we will have a holiday somewhere exotic and I will continue to use the money for our enjoyment - it's the first time in my adult life that I've had spare money and I know my Mum would be really happy that we're using some of her money and not just leaving it in the building society to gather interest. My husband uses the money he inherited from his father to supplement his pension when me needs to. If we don't have to sell our house to pay for care costs, When we die, my daughter will inherit our house and so will be comfortably off. What's the point of us saving money that we've inherited now that we've reached retirement age?

@x2boys @User0224 The point of passing the money down is so that your future generations can hopefully have a better life than you have had and by passing down what you can you're helping to ensure that happens.
Clearly, that is as long as you have enough to have a happy life as well.

I would say family money.
If I inherited it would go to paying down the mortgage, helping DC, perhaps a family holiday and perhaps a piece of jewellery for me.
But overwhelming would be family money for our whole family's benefit - not just mine.
I think legally if you are married then assets are shared equally.
But is also the moral thing to do.

I never said anything about huge sums of money. Money looses value over time. It needs to be invested in land, property, stocks and shares. You don’t soend a house or land. You can use them to make money though. Which you can spend !?