Inheritance -Family money?

[ZekeZeke]

Example:
Married 25 years, no mortgage both work.
2 adult children in University still living at home.(both working part time).
Widowed MIL dies. DH inherits £200,000
Is this family pot money?
DH Money?
DH and DW money?
DH ans DC money?

DH money.

But my DH wouldn’t use for his own personal use, it would be used for example to pay off our own home, buy another home, family holidays etc and then some to our kids. So we would treat it jointly even though I would fully acknowledge that it’s his

When I inherited money we used it to pay off our joint mortgage. If we did have a mortgage we would have spent it on either doing the house up / a better house / joint holidays. For us it’s very much family money. (Married 15 years, 2 dc).

*didn’t

It would be joint for us, because we jointly decide what to do with all money over a few £k, but the main inheritor might take an amount to buy something special for themselves. We might store it in savings under either name though, as we've never got around to setting up a joint account.

Our inheritances are ours individually. We have separate finances and if we divorce we each leave with what we brought in. I wouldn’t have married anyone who thought they were entitled to somebody else’s parents’ money that they’d had no part in earning or saving, and wouldn’t ever take somebody else’s.

I'd say it was money for DH as it was left by his parents.

Agree

Family money.

When MIL died, DH shared his small inheritance with me 50/50 totally his decision. The inheritance I’m due to get, which is more than double what he received, will go towards a nice holiday, DH dropping a day at work until retirement and me fully retiring now. Totally my decision but DH is fully in agreement. I’ve already equally shared an initial payment I received from her cash account between me, DH and both DDs

For us it was a joint decision about how we would spend it - but led by me, as the person who had inherited it. That is absolutely how we deal with most finance though (shared pot with small personal accounts), and in fairness I lead on most of it because it interests me! My DH not so much.

You’d think the person who inherited it would have the final say, but the presumption would be it’s for the benefit of the family if needed. Only if everyone was pretty comfortable would it be all “fun money” for one person.

Then again, it would be a mean spouse who argued against the inheritor having anything just for themselves.

Its about balance and assuming both partners are decent people!

If/when this happens, I know DH will put it straight into the joint savings.

That’s very noble of you, but do you think you’d feel the same if you were a SAHM with young children being forced to move house if you split up whilst DH got to stay in a nice home? Circumstances sometimes change.

I also sort of thing inheritance is “generational money” - should be spent to benefit the next generation too, or saved for them if not needed for eg mortgage, house for them to live in etc

It’s his money, but hopefully he uses it for the good of the family, his choice on how it’s spent.

When DM died, the money she left went into joint finances; half was invested, the rest was used to make improvements on the house, have a couple of great holidays and generally improve our lives.

This is interesting. I would say joint family money. And I stand to inherit probably 20 x what my DH will.

Legally it belongs to the person who inherited. If they choose to pay off joint assets it becomes joint money. paying off the mortgage or extensions etc.

They can choose to give the children some, or even spend on holidays - but it remains the property of the owner until it’s spent.

I personally don’t think you should make any big decisions for a few months after receiving inheritance.

Why do you not really see his inheritance as joint money but say your inheritance will go into the family pot as joint money??

I got a large payout ( compensation ) just over 2 mil. I'm on my own but have daughters / Grandkids.. they got a new house each and money is there whenever anyone wants any.. holiday/ University/ if l had a partner would be theirs too.. not the same as inheritance but l do believe a family is a family and should benefit everyone.

I'd say from a moral standpoint it's his. It was specifically left to him, so it's up to him to use as he wishes.

I don't think many people would leave an inheritance to their child and the child's spouse. There's always the risk that a couple might split up between the will being written and the inheritance being realised.

Having said that, I think most happily married couples will share finances - including any inheritances.

When we inherited from my mum we used the money to pay off our mortgage, buy a new car, pay for a holiday, get a new kitchen etc.

When we inherited from DH's mum we put the money towards a new house.

In both scenarios we discussed and agreed how the money should be spent. But obviously the person who hasn't inherited shouldn't be trying to take the lead.

I think it depends on overall finances,
theres lots of things we can’t manage at the moment like extra hobbies, home improvements and a second car that would make life a lot easier for us all.
if we comfortably managed the mortgage, holidays and cars etc already then it’s easier to say keep an inheritance separate from family money
if I inherit I will definitely see it as ‘my money’ so I wouldn’t be okay with Dh helping himself and using it for a boys holiday for example.
but we do share finances and I would make spending decisions that benefitted the family not just buy myself diamonds

I can’t imagine being marrried to someone who looks at their partner and the other parent of our 3 children and says nope this inheritance is mine, so I guess it takes all kinds.
we would both treat any inheritance as joint, but be sensitive to where it came from ie a parent dying and if that affected what the inheriting child wanted eg a special trip (I can see Dh wanting that kind of thing)

The money was left to the husband, so it is his, and only his.
That is the sole legal case.

What he does with it is his choice.
To assert others have some right to it is nonsense.