She always wins because she cheats!

[abouttogetlynched]

AIBU to be pissed off that my 8 y/os friends mum makes stuff for her kid for school when it’s supposed to be made by the kid and she ultimately wins every time for the best item?
She won best Easter bonnet competition and won a giant Easter egg, she won best something or other at Christmas and got extra breaks, she won something creative last year and got to sit on a ‘throne’ all day at school and a big bag of sweets. But the mum makes all these things for her and not only should it be very obvious to the teachers that it’s not been made by an 8 year old, but the mum tells me she’s made it all and laughs about it. The kid is never involved in helping or even gives ideas, and often doesn’t even see the item until it’s given to her on the day of the competition. The one at Christmas she hadn’t seen at all coz the mum just handed it in directly to school.
The kid never admits that she’s had no involvement in making it and gratefully accepts the rewards and attention lavished on her for always winning at these creative competitions. My DD is getting quite jealous at this friend apparently being so much better than her at things and always winning. Pisses me off.

Oh, I was this child! My mum was obsessive about my homework and got involved in everything. It all had to be done to the highest standard, and ordinary assignments had to be drafted before being copied out again for the final submission. I hated it. Although she never intended it, she made me feel as though I could never do things well enough by myself. It was also embarrassing to take in craft projects that she had clearly made for me. The other students knew it, and a teacher once made a scathing comment. I don’t think they realised that I had no choice in the matter 😅 if I were you, I’d definitely raise it with the teacher, as much for her daughter’s sake as your own

That is awful. I couldn't be friends with someone like this.

In that case I would be saying to my DD " ah well you didn't get the prize..but at least your Mum's not an arsehole!"

😂
yes you’re right, my daughter is jealous! 👏
get @WandaWonder a giant chocolate egg!

Threads like this make me very happy that my DD's school didn't get involved in any of this nonsense. There were maybe two things to make at home over the course of the whole of primary, and neither of them were a competition.

Didn't you say that in your op?

Not sure what you’re on about now @WandaWonder but maybe go out for a walk or have a nap.

This is unbelievably common. Used to see examples of this all the time when my DC attended primary school. Was usually so glaringly obvious there had been very heavy/total adult participation no-one was fooled. A few of the teachers clearly disapproved so made sure these ones never won the prize which did help. Alway the same “power mummies” who did it.

Well YANBU, but I bet MOST kids have the stuff they claim to have made actually made by their mother - or dad! One kid we used to know at school had her mother write a story for her that won best short story competition at school, for 7-11 y.o, and it was breathtakingly obvious the girl herself had not written it! The girl even told a few people later on, that her mother had written it!

obviously in this situation you know the mum is doing it but it can be hard for the teachers to judge.
DD is really really creative and in primary school she entered a cake decorating competition - it was fab and probably better than 99% adults ability. I also decorate cakes as a hobby. I ended up putting photos on facebook that I had taken of her during the making of it as i felt people didnt believe she had done it!

Why are you being rude to WandaWonder. You did say in your OP that your daughter was becoming jealous so you can do either of two things that have been suggested on here - report to the school or just ignore.

Because she said to me
OK so you and your child are jealous, do the mature thing and just ignore it
It is non of your business

which I actually thought was quite a rude comment from her.

And yes I had already stated that my daughter was jealous. Wouldn’t say I was jealous, just pissed off. Maybe I’m missing the point here.

The teacher sounds a bit dim to be honest, if it is so obvious.

If there are substantial prizes the items should be made in school, not brought from home. That is what happens in some schools.

My favourite was a mum who made a taj mahal model for her 5 year old's school project
cardsandschoolprojects.blogspot.com/2011/02/taj-mahal-model.html?m=1

My DS's school's judging criteria seemed to be to choose the one which looked most like a child had made it. He won a couple of times with some absolute rubbish but he was happy.

I would just let this go. The teachers can't be that stupid and it won't go on for long. It's obvious when an 8 year-old has made something. Even if the child had made the stuff herself, they won't just keep on giving the same child prizes for everything. Just let it go. They're 8.

That's how my dcs' school judged Book Day. Mine never won as they had shop bought costumes from Amazon 😀

I used to tell my DC a child wins because someone else did the work for them or they cheated in some other way to win it's really sad because that DC might never get another go to do it like other DC on their own.

Well it’s been going on for 5 years now, so doesn’t show much sign of stopping unfortunately. It seems that “just letting it go” isn’t going to make any difference.
its not like they do this kind of stuff a lot, so she’s not constantly winning prizes, just that whenever there is a prize to be won for something that has been made at home it’s always her who wins. I would say once or twice a year.

I used to hate this sort of homework with a passion. Years ago my DD had to make a Tudor house, I made it and she painted it. It looked ok, when we took it in there were children walking in with huge houses that included working lights. When my DS had the same homework I sent him in with the exact Tudor house we had made for DD. I was advised by other parents to keep it as I could use it for him! It’s well known that the parents make the things and are used for several siblings.

It’s the old mumsnet classic response. You don’t have a school mum problem, you have a school/teachers problem. Any decent teacher will recognise what is and isn’t a child’s own work - especially at that age - and give out the prizes accordingly.

Yeh it’s annoying coz this kid does win things fairly as well like the maths app times table rock stars and thats undisputed, so for her to also win when it’s unfair is well just that - unfair!

Most school staff are wise to this and don't fall for it. I'm surprised that the same child has won every time too. That's exceptionally rare.

Also decent schools don't tend to give big bags of sweets as prizes as they usually promote a healthy lifestyle. It all sounds a bit odd to me.

One of dd's teachers did this. I was really relieved as there was a kid who often won and I suspected that it was mainly parent led.