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AIBU to be kicking up shit in the doctors?

194 replies

Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 19:32

since 2021 I’ve been suffering stage 4 Endometriosis and a Endometrioma Cyst (chocolate cyst) last measured 6 months ago my cyst was sitting at 30CM.

I will include a couple of photos.
im on every medication that you could think of for pain relief.

This all started due to my section when I had my child the surgeon left tissue inside of my that was suppose to me taking away a trainee was also involved in this at this time.
( I didn’t sign anything for a trainee to be involved in my surgery) it was an emergency c section.

Now I am regularly at the doctors see my GP trying to have this sorted I know there is a waiting list but I am absolutely sick and tired of the NHS they are saying they are still working behind from covid patients in the gynaecology department for surgery.
now I’ve been on the waiting list for surgery since 2021 I called last week to the secretary of the surgeon that is doing the surgery and she told me I possible have another 76 WEEKS until surgery is due.

how can I possible deal with my life is turned up side down I no longer can do anything with my kids or have a life it’s completely destroyed me in every way.

AIBU to be kicking up shit in the doctors?
AIBU to be kicking up shit in the doctors?
OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

653 votes. Final results.

You are being unreasonable
You are NOT being unreasonable
Littlefidget2 · 06/02/2024 19:37

Lovelyjubbley, I'm really sorry to be suffering like this, but what are you expecting your GP to do? This is a secondary care problem. You need to keep contacting the hospital and go through their complaints procedure. Your GP can do absolutely nothing there, especially if they have already tried to expedite your appointment.

NestaArcheron · 06/02/2024 19:38

Gosh I'm so sorry to read this - I really feel for you.

Bs0u416d · 06/02/2024 19:38

I understand how you must be feeling and I am sorry you have been let down in this way. Who are you wanting to kick up shit with? Your GP I assume. I'm not sure how far that will get you and it's also not a problem of their making. Have you though about writting to your MP or booking an appointment to see them when they're next holding a surgery at their office?

Wolfpa · 06/02/2024 19:38

I am sorry that this is happening to you, you must be in a lot of pain.

However kicking off at some poor receptionist at the doctors or even the doctor themself is unreasonable. They are doing the best they can with what they have to work with.

you should be going to your MP they are the ones we have elected to fight our corners on these matters.

Dogzombie · 06/02/2024 19:40

you poor thing. This is awful but the GP probably can’t do much.
contact PALS and go through the complaints procedure for the hospital. I had to do this recently when a doctor made an error and no one noticed for four months. I contacted PALS, asked for their complaints procedure and followed that. It got sorted quickly x

Willmafrockfit · 06/02/2024 19:40

agree, go to your MP

peakygold · 06/02/2024 19:41

Get the phone number for one of the Gynae secretaries at the hospital. Switchboard will put you through. You will need to see a Consultant first, and making friends with the secretary is a really good idea. Good luck.

DistinguishedSocialCommenator · 06/02/2024 19:43

r OP

I'm sorry to read about your circumstances

You do not want to get baned from the GP so dont do it.
More importantly, the GP surgery has done their bit the way I have read your posting and it is not their fault.

We have been messed around, to old to get private health as so many pre-existing conditions and even private health, our children and grandchildren have this, there are now waiting times for many items.

Complain to PALS at the hospital

I hope I've not misunderstood your post

Wishing you well!

Edit = NB - Try to fid out if other parts of England has smaller waiting times and get referred there if it is practical - ask doc about it

Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 19:45

Hi guys! I’m really frustrated I’m in agony every day of my life now when I take my period every month Instead of it physically coming out of me it’s coming out in blood bruised all over my tummy I can’t even walk anywhere or look after myself! I cry most days with this!

I know I’m probably been unreasonable I’m not shouting at any GP or doctor my Own Gp is done all he can but no one seems to be helping me I have no one else other than my GP that can get on the hospital for me and there’s never any updates when I go back and see him I feel totally drained

OP posts:
Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 19:45

And sorry I’m currently in Scotland .

OP posts:
Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 19:48

@peakygold I have done exactly this last week and the lovely girl explained they are still working through patients from 2021/22 and I have still a long wait to go. I’m just so frustrated my son and daughter are 5 and 6 and I’ve missed out on so much with the kids that it makes me cry even to think about it no holidays no days out no swimming or parks.

I haven’t got much child care either they do go to school and nursery but my mum will take them over night once a month as she has health conditions aswell and that’s all so I don’t even have time to recharge when I’m at my worst

OP posts:
Amara123 · 06/02/2024 19:49


Yes your GP is not likely to be able to do much either, they will be put waiting on an appointment line just like you would be.

Some ideas:
Find out what surgeon you are referred to.
Call the hospital and ask for the secretary of that surgeon. Describe the issues you are having to them and advise you will take a short notice cancellation appointment. It might work.

Also try PALS like described above.

Third option is private but that will cost.

Terrrence · 06/02/2024 19:50

Oh my god! Surely this is an emergency. Go to your MP or A & E. I would go private if I were you if I didn't get it sorted quickly even if I had to borrow all the money. It's a disgrace that the NHS did this to you and are now leaving you in this state. I would probably try a solicitor.

Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 19:52

Could someone explain what PALS is? So I could look in to this I just find it’s a terrible amount of time to be waiting my stomach was no we’re near this bad when it first started to start off with I had a small 3cm cyst just sitting above my C-section star.

now have endometriosis that has spread to my bowels hips lower abdomen

OP posts:
Kayjay2018 · 06/02/2024 19:52

I'm sure I have read somewhere that if you are due to wait over a certain amount of time you can look to choose to be treated by a different hospital if they have a lower waiting time. I haven't read it all, only did a small bit of reading when my dad was told he needed full hip replacement

It might be worth looking into.

My dad's hip from first consultant appointment to full replacement was only 6 weeks. We had looked at the hospital and all those around it and where he was scheduled to go had the shortest wait time for orthopaedics (didn't go into it more than that) so we didn't do any more research

Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 19:53

@Kayjay2018 I will definitely look in to this thank you .

OP posts:
DNLove · 06/02/2024 19:55

I'd be getting a solicitor involved. You have been damaged in a routine surgery by someone unqualified to perform the surgery that wasn't allowed by you and clearly not supervised properly.

Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 19:55

@Terrrence I do feel like it’s an emergency but as explained I’m just not getting listened to and just been recommended to get a mirena coil put in at the sandy ford

I went to see about my mirena coil to be fitted and the girl that was going to put it in had a look at my stomach and call the gynaecologist in the Glasgow Sandyford and they decided not to put it in due to the severe swelling and not wanting to damage me more as the cyst is also attached to the tubes and ovaries

OP posts:
Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 19:59


i have been told by a number of people to get involved with a solicitor. but the amount of stress this is caused is making me think what if I do this and they damage me more because I sue them or if they get rid of my files to
cover up or something my anxiety is just so bad atm.

finding a day where I could actually get out to see a solicitor is tricky because I can’t walk anymore I can’t stand for any amount of time without needing to sit down I’m only 28
and feel like I don’t have a life

i will get on to the solicitor but it’s just finding a day were I know I will be able to get out very unpredictable this pain

OP posts:
mirror245 · 06/02/2024 19:59

I would be contacting a solicitor specialising in medical negligence and then PALs. This is outrageous that you have to live like this.

ISpeakahDuolingo · 06/02/2024 19:59

I think I'd be consulting a solicitor by now. You poor thing op, this is awful and I don't blame you for wanting to raise hell. But do it in the most constructive ways - schmooze the secretaries, call the hospital weekly for updates, present at a&e if you have to, consult a solicitor and go through PALS. Good luck x

brokenbitbybit · 06/02/2024 20:02

I hope this is a story the daily mail or some other shit head news reporter picks up on because it's absolutely vile you're being treated like this!
It may be worth taking this to the mp along with a copy of the nhs constitution and highlighting every bit where they are NOT adhering to it.
I'm so sorry I don't really have any advice but I hope you do get sorted soon

flea101 · 06/02/2024 20:02

Slightly different but it is called right to choose, we have just done it for our 8 year olds ASD assessment. Cornwall wait is 3-4 years, we will be seen in 6 months but have to travel to Essex. If you could travel anywhere in the country it may be worth asking for it, we had to argue as our gp said it isn't a thing, I then proved that it was and after that it was straightforward! Good luck.

Catsonskis · 06/02/2024 20:02

Hi OP, I’m an NHS manager and I’m so sorry you’re suffering and struggling and being treated this way.
May advice to you is to contact PALs (patient liaison service) or if they don’t have one at your trust in Scotland, contact either the complaints department and or the directorate manager for gynaecology (if the latter’s detail is not on the trust website, call switchboard and ask either to be put through to them or for their email address.

when you contact them explain the following:

  • this initial inquest is informal but should you not get a satisfactory response you will escalate the concern to a formal complaint
  • Detail your timeline of events, including your symptoms.
  • ask for a full pathway validation to ensure that your RTT clock is appropriate and you are at the right weeks wait (every patient should have a clock started when the gp refers you, pre Covid the aim was 92% treated within 18 weeks but now the aim is everyone who is 65 weeks and over to be treated by end of March. Not many trusts are reporting many cases more than 100 weeks, and if you were referred in 2021, you would surely be their longest waiter - hence I don’t think your pathway is accurate.
  • next I would ask for a clinical review of your pathway from a consultant - to ensure your priority code (P1-4, 1 being emergency, 2 urgent, 3 non-urgent, 4 planned) is correct and inline with your weeks wait, and your clinical indication from your letters.
  • ask specifically for the feedback from both these reviews.
  • ask what their plan is to treat you within the next few months
  • ask for a face to face outpatient appointment with your consultant.

if they come back with a response and you want me to sense check it, please feel free to DM me.

each patient over 56 weeks wait should have a full validation and review by the operational team and a clinical risk stratification regularly.

I hope you get some answers and more importantly some treatment soon.

ps, leave your gp alone, they’ll be as frustrated as you and literally as unable to do anything about it as your post man sadly.

good luck and reach out if you need any thing explaining further
Lovelyjubbbly · 06/02/2024 20:03

i don’t even know where to start with this I may seek advice from citizens advice or maybe call a couple of lawyers tomorrow morning and ask there advice and see if they could see me.

OP posts:
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