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Original poster

Food portions and how to laugh this off??

608 replies

PenisPortions · 04/02/2024 01:01

Help me dear mners, my dh is gaslighting me into accepting his penis portions and I need your stories of similar craziness to help me laugh it off..!

In laws came round, we had two large steaks for dinner. MIL wasn't keen on steak so we made her a stuffed pepper and sides so she was catered for and happy. FIL wanted half of one of the steaks, fine. Dh asked what I thought about that and I said yes fine we'll just share the rest. Dh looked confused for a bit and I said I think it's enough between the two of us to share the remainder.

FIL cooked the sides, DH bbqed the steaks (i was in with the baby), and I come out to see three plates of food. Two have half a steak on them and the third has a whole steak, which dh had claimed as his plate.

I was like ummm are you not splitting it? He said yes I did, and I kind of laughed in disbelief saying no you've given yourself twice the amount of food as me! He got really defensive, said this was what we agreed (not true), and got cross. I told him I was going to even things out, so cut off some of his, and he was so grumpy about it, saying he'd said he wanted a full one and I agreed to that. No "I'm sorry I misunderstood and under catered for you, let's split it like grown ups".

It is such a stupid little thing but keeps playing on my mind, what on earth was that?! Please tell me stories of similar imbalances that your partners have tried to get away with to help me put it into perspective.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
Codlingmoths · 04/02/2024 20:11

Hmm trying with image.

Food portions and how to laugh this off??
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 04/02/2024 20:12

Basic biology- women and children need alot more iron than men do.

So women and children should really be prioritised for any red meat going.

Men are fine to fill up on the other stuff - by all means have an equal portion of the steak if that’s feasible but they definitely don’t need more of it.

Throw into the mix a breastfeeding mother and he’s absolutely being U.

Codlingmoths · 04/02/2024 20:16

Calliopespa · 04/02/2024 17:42

🙄 More than happy to admit that if I had to suddenly share 1.5 steaks between two because we had guests turn up unexpectedly I would omit to factor in iron levels in one quarter of a fillet steak. Even after your lengthy cautions around the issue, I expect I probably still won’t, should the occasion arise.

Show quote history

I wouldn’t have omitted to factor in the relevance when I was a low iron exhausted breastfeeding mum trying to replenish my levels. This wouldn’t have happened with my dh but it would have been world war 3 if it had.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 04/02/2024 20:18

I would actually have assumed that the steak left whole was for the bf mum and the half was for the dad!

Meowandthen · 04/02/2024 20:21

RowanMayfair · 04/02/2024 06:59

Amazed at the number of people missing the point by a mile here.

Yes, some men may have bigger caloric needs on average than their female partners (some don't!) but that doesn't mean they get the lion's share of the best bits of dinner automatically.

Yes it's unusual to split 2 steaks between 3 but there is a very easy to understand reason for that since the PILs were not expected for dinner in advance and the FIL only wanted half a steak.

Yes it was selfish of the DH to assume that 1.5 steaks split between 2 means half for her and 1 for him.

OP I'm sorry but no my DH would never do this (not that we eat meat but the principle is there)

Exactly.

An awful lot of posters are making excuses for penis portions so it’s clear how this sexist nonsense carries on.

I eat as much as my husband at mealtimes as I am more active and burn far more calories.

Meowandthen · 04/02/2024 20:23

Tartantotty · 04/02/2024 19:11

Steak - red meat - is not good for your health. So, a smaller portion is better than a big slab.

Many men tend to be into steak, perhaps because they need more calories or perhaps the male hunter instinct.

All I can say is - this is a first world problem. Think of those who could never afford a steak. Think of Gaza,

First prize for sanctimony. 🙄

43ontherocksporfavor · 04/02/2024 20:24

Men need more food than women generally don’t they?

Gia79 · 04/02/2024 20:25

Tartantotty · 04/02/2024 19:11

Steak - red meat - is not good for your health. So, a smaller portion is better than a big slab.

Many men tend to be into steak, perhaps because they need more calories or perhaps the male hunter instinct.

All I can say is - this is a first world problem. Think of those who could never afford a steak. Think of Gaza,

Or perhaps because they think men should be into steaks, in the same way my male colleagues try to outdo each other when it comes to ordering the hottest curry. 🙄

SapphireSeptember · 04/02/2024 20:25

D600 · 04/02/2024 13:09

Exactly @theconfidenceofwho .
Female intake quantity 75-80% that of a male.
And if the excuse is breast feeding, which it obviously isn't given the post, that steak isn't doing the baby any good.
It is 2024 wake the hell up @PenisPortions. Where have you been?

@PenisPortions I suppose always wants penis portions.😂

Is this a wind up? It's been clearly stated a few times now that pregnant and breastfeeding women need a hell of a lot more protein than men do, and more iron. Protein is going to help both mother and baby. Also OP did state she's breastfeeding, didn't realise that was an excuse.

(Now I know why I've been craving tuna, roast beef and milk. 😋)

Meowandthen · 04/02/2024 20:26

43ontherocksporfavor · 04/02/2024 20:24

Men need more food than women generally don’t they?

Point missed by a country mile.

Men are not entitled to anything simply by being male.

ChedderGorgeous · 04/02/2024 20:26

The campaign starts now

Food portions and how to laugh this off??
43ontherocksporfavor · 04/02/2024 20:28

@Meowandthen Last time I checked, men need more calories daily than women. DH is 6ft 4 and I’m 5ft 5, we don’t eat the same amount obviously.

Gobolina · 04/02/2024 20:33

PenisPortions · 04/02/2024 02:29

There was enough food in the house. It was agreed that we wouldn't cook the lamb chops as well, since fil only wanted half a steak and the remaining meat was enough to be shared between two. I think fil had a late lunch so really did only want that much.

This is specifically about dh seeing 1.5 steaks leftover and deciding not to share it equally between us.

Show quote history

Your husband is selfish.

My dh would see that and give me the whole one. Hes kinder than me 😂 I'd see that and split it equally, depending on how hungry I was, if he was lucky and I wasn't very hungry he'd get more than an equal split, or even the whole one if the half was enough for me. But if I was hungry it would be an even split.

But we always over cater a bit anyway so there is enough and leftovers if we don't eat it all.

fetchacloth · 04/02/2024 20:37

Calliopespa · 04/02/2024 17:58

All I can say after reading this thread is thank goodness for the MIL and her ilk! 🤣 I’m beginning to see how and why she acquired her taste for stuffed peppers.

Me too.
What a palaver over a couple of steaks that should have been three 😳

Coyoacan · 04/02/2024 20:40

Think of Gaza

I think of Gaza everyday and the many kind and considerate adults being killed and the children that never got a chance to grow into kind and considerate adults. Makes me want to doubly condemn a selfish macho's treatment of his breastfeeding wife

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 04/02/2024 20:43

Coyoacan · 04/02/2024 20:40

Think of Gaza

I think of Gaza everyday and the many kind and considerate adults being killed and the children that never got a chance to grow into kind and considerate adults. Makes me want to doubly condemn a selfish macho's treatment of his breastfeeding wife

Yes quite! And it’s very much a men’s war there, killing the women and children.

InASnowGlobeSpinning · 04/02/2024 21:01

43ontherocksporfavor · 04/02/2024 20:28

@Meowandthen Last time I checked, men need more calories daily than women. DH is 6ft 4 and I’m 5ft 5, we don’t eat the same amount obviously.

But in this case, the OP didn't have enough food. There was less steak than intended and, instead of both of them forgoing some, her husband decided he should give up nothing at all and she should give up half.

As has been stated over and over, he could have got more calories from sides. But he decided he should have all the steak he wanted, and she shouldn't have all the steak she wanted.

His greater calorific needs don't mean he should get twice as much fillet steak as his breastfeeding wife who is hungry and wants a full portion.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 04/02/2024 21:12

InASnowGlobeSpinning · 04/02/2024 21:01

But in this case, the OP didn't have enough food. There was less steak than intended and, instead of both of them forgoing some, her husband decided he should give up nothing at all and she should give up half.

As has been stated over and over, he could have got more calories from sides. But he decided he should have all the steak he wanted, and she shouldn't have all the steak she wanted.

His greater calorific needs don't mean he should get twice as much fillet steak as his breastfeeding wife who is hungry and wants a full portion.

Show quote history

Well put. And if people don’t get it from this, they never will.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 04/02/2024 21:13

They need more calories. Not more fillet steak 🙄

InASnowGlobeSpinning · 04/02/2024 21:16

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 04/02/2024 21:12

Well put. And if people don’t get it from this, they never will.

Show quote history

Judging by the thread, I suspect they never will!

pootlin · 04/02/2024 21:19

YANBU, he was a dick. DH always gives me a bigger portion than him when he’s cooking. I do the same when I cook, give him the bigger half.

SomeCatFromJapan · 04/02/2024 21:19

Of course red meat isn't unhealthy! We evolved to eat it, not bloody pea protein.

Meat is a complete protein ie all amino acids, and its nutrients are highly bioavailable compared to plant protein sources.

ChedderGorgeous · 04/02/2024 21:20

SomeCatFromJapan · 04/02/2024 21:19

Of course red meat isn't unhealthy! We evolved to eat it, not bloody pea protein.

Meat is a complete protein ie all amino acids, and its nutrients are highly bioavailable compared to plant protein sources.

Long term, red meat increases risk of bowel cancer

pootlin · 04/02/2024 21:27

alpenguin · 04/02/2024 02:04

It was a bit presumptuous of your husband to assume he got the whole steak and you’d get the half but unless you called him out on it and reclaimed your share then I don’t know why you’d complain.

My stepmum has done this to me all my life. There’s an age gap between me and my younger siblings so I when was a working adult when they were at school. At the time I worked very active manual jobs (lots of heavy lifting and walking) and yet I still got half the portion size my male Siblings got. All the girls and women got tiny portions and I’d end up having to get something else later on which I hated doing so I spoke up. Thankfully now she doesn’t plate up and we help ourselves so the women dig in.

My partner gives us equal huge portions but I end up giving him 1/3-1/2 of mine anyway.

I hope you all cook for her too? Poor step mum!

SomeCatFromJapan · 04/02/2024 21:28

Long term, red meat increases risk of bowel cancer

Processed meats. Not fillet steak.