Wedding Dress Code - Only Black Allowed

[YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan]

I'm going to a wedding but the bride has specified that all guests must wear black only and no colours. Not even coloured shoes or accessories. Herself and the groom will both be wearing white.

She's seen a video online which I've looked at with a black dress code. However that wedding is outdoors in sunny weather. The women are all wearing clothes that show plenty of skin - bare arms, bare legs, low necklines in lightweight fabrics. The various shades of skin breaks the black clothing up and it looks ok.

This wedding is in the winter in a very cold location, so I'll need to be wearing heavier fabric with long sleeves, high neckline and thick tights on. I would imagine the other women will be covering up to keep warm. I don't think it'll work as there will be no skin to break the black colour up. I think we'll all just look like one big black lump with several heads on the group photos!

I also don't suit black at all. I'm very pale skinned and it makes me look washed out and unwell. My mother has pale skin and is also concerned about this.

Just wondering if anyone has been to a wedding with such a strict dress code and how did it turn out?

Surely you can get kilts for £20 on Amazon?!

If it is a winter wedding in a cold venue then I would wear black, but my scarf and gloves are not black and I wouldn't go out to buy them in black to just wear once.

@PrawnDumplings but why should he have to wear one. It’s just for photos, what does that say about the bride’s priorities

I wouldn't (and didn't) include cultural/religious requirements as 'ill-mannered' and 'self-indulgent' as it's obvious that they aren't.

Surely you can get kilts for £20 on Amazon?!

I think it is a mssively unreasonable to insist that all the men wear kilts. If DH was told to wear one he would either wear trousers or not go.

@PrawnDumplings and what sweat shop would a £20 kilt be made in?

It says they have a dress code at their wedding 🤷🏻‍♀️

@PrawnDumplings dress codes are usually linked to the venue, so certain religious venues will expect heads/shoulders covered, or some expect black tie, but a dress code of all black and no colour whatsoever or a certain item of clothing is all about the photos. And let’s face it how many of us look back at our wedding photos on a regular basis. The bride has their priorities all skewed

@PrawnDumplings it says it's all able appearances not about family and friendship!

If you look right, you can gone in, otherwise you're off the list.

£150 to hire a kilt is excessive IMO.

Honestly the number of mean spirited kill joys on this thread is sad. .

It's a wedding. Presumably those of you who are close enough to the happy couple to be invited....They would like you this enter into the spirit of their celebration (whatever that means to them) on their one special day.

But instead so many of you are moaning, judging and stomping your feet saying "I'm not going if you only want me for my clothes!"
Give over!

No. It's a dress code.

I think some of you have YOUR priorities all wrong.
It's their happy day. Not yours. If you love them then maybe get over yourselves, wish them well and have fun?

I'm off now. To my lovey friends. Who don't judge me. Or decide to take massive offence for stupid reasons. See ya. 👋

A £20 kilt off Amazon would not meet the dress code and yes proper kilts with the sporran etc are £150 to hire

Some years ago, a young relative was planning to hold her wedding reception in the large country garden of her fiancé's parents' home - an ideal location as friends and family would not have had to travel far. She then changed the venue to a destination wedding, which meant that guests would need to fly and book hotels etc and incur considerable expense. This meant that some relatives could not attend. She then announced that she wanted all guests to wear two specific colours. The couple had planned to hold an evening party local to where they were living a few days after they returned home for friends and family and for those who had not been able to attend the destination wedding. Invitations were sent out with a note saying they did not want wedding gifts as they had been living together for sometime but there would be boxes placed on the tables for cheques, if guests would like to give them money. Then the UK party was cancelled at short notice because the couple decided they'd rather stay on for a few more days at the destination resort and wanted to save money...

Our friends did black and white, and then she arrived in a dress of a really bright colour. It worked for them. It not what we would do, but then it's not us who have to look at the photos indefinitely so it wasn't my place to comment. To be fair, most people have some black in their wardrobe so shouldn't be a major issue for most.

What a spoilt woman she sounds, and an idiot - all black at a wedding? Talk about a portent of doom. It’ll look like a funeral.

Oh well, up to her. But it’ll look awful.

You have my sympathies OP. My mother in law did this at her second wedding. All guests had to wear black and white while she wore red so the photographs would look how she wanted. I'ts just one of one of many examples Ive seen of her vain, self obsessed nature. We went LC after she wore white to our wedding.

I would be surprised if most younger men own a black suit. It’s not fashionable. So they will have to buy one and possibly a black shirt. Although you can get cheap black shirts in Asda or Primark.
Yes to the funeral outfits coming out.
Of course elderly relatives are not going to go out and buy a lbd. They will no doubt wear their funeral attire and that is totally fine.

@PrawnDumplings don't forget this decision is the bride's not the happy couple's, groom is not for it.

I think, in your case, that would be quite a relief for the bride and groom.

I'm not a fan of dress codes for weddings, but you’ve been so unpleasant about the concept on this thread that I can’t help thinking it must go beyond mere dislike of being told what to wear. You seem to think the entire thing would be designed to make you personally miserable. It’s ironic that you think a bride and groom making such decisions are being selfish when your posts are almost exclusively “But what about meeeeeeeee?! I don’t like it!!”

Unpopular on here, but OP, I actually think you are being extremely unreasonable and seem desperate to find something to moan about.
Firstly, if you don’t like the dress code- just don’t go. Simple. At the end of the day, it doesn’t really matter if it is not a colour that suits you- you aren’t the only guest and it isn’t your celebration.
Secondly, it isn’t a ‘big milestone’ for you. That’s your own wedding day.
Thirdly, I’ve been to countries that are minus 20 outside, and inside was not too cold for an average, sensible wedding outfit (of any colour!). Unless they are getting married in a tent, in Greenland, with no heating; you are just looking for something to whinge about. Same re the church- who cares what colour you are in? They are old, brick buildings. They are chilly. This shouldn’t be a surprise.

I attended a funeral a few years ago where the guests were asked to wear her favourite colour- a relatively obscure one. Every single person there did as requested and celebrated her life with the family. Would you post complaining about that?
If you are invited to someone else’s celebration- be it of their life, their marriage, their baby’s christening …whatever then you celebrate with them as wished. Or you don’t go, and pass on your best wishes. Simple.

Most weddings and formal events are about appearances to an extent. People don't rock up to most weddings in joggers and a T-shirt. If a couple wants a super-informal wedding they usually have to say so (in which case that becomes a dress code as well).

I'm most comfortable in athleisure and never feel totally relaxed in a cocktail dress but as I'm an adult I can cope with minor discomfort to enjoy formal events.

We are getting more invited to weddings with dress codes. On the whole they are ignored by many but often followed by close family and friends. The events I'm talking about attract often more than a few hundred people

It is hard but its their wedding

@gannett as an adult the bride can deal with seeing colour outfits on her guests, lots of situations require formal dress, work, christenings, interviews etc.

No one needs a petulant immature bride demanding a colour code....

It's so childish! Although maybe it would've been worse if she decided on princess theme....

Are they still married?