Wedding Dress Code - Only Black Allowed

[YorkshirePuddingsGreatestFan]

I'm going to a wedding but the bride has specified that all guests must wear black only and no colours. Not even coloured shoes or accessories. Herself and the groom will both be wearing white.

She's seen a video online which I've looked at with a black dress code. However that wedding is outdoors in sunny weather. The women are all wearing clothes that show plenty of skin - bare arms, bare legs, low necklines in lightweight fabrics. The various shades of skin breaks the black clothing up and it looks ok.

This wedding is in the winter in a very cold location, so I'll need to be wearing heavier fabric with long sleeves, high neckline and thick tights on. I would imagine the other women will be covering up to keep warm. I don't think it'll work as there will be no skin to break the black colour up. I think we'll all just look like one big black lump with several heads on the group photos!

I also don't suit black at all. I'm very pale skinned and it makes me look washed out and unwell. My mother has pale skin and is also concerned about this.

Just wondering if anyone has been to a wedding with such a strict dress code and how did it turn out?

I don't really get this. OP, if you're going to the wedding, you really need to wear black. If you don't want to wear black, then you shouldn't go to the wedding.

No-one here can change the dress code for you or turn the heating up in the venue.

Yes it's annoying but it's literally one day!

No one has mentioned the cost for the blokes to all buy a black suit. Most guy I know don’t have one, they have a navy or charcoal one that is suitable for funerals. I can’t imagine many would be happy to buy on for a one off.

I’m assuming no children as that would also spoil the aesthetic!

I think brides (and grooms) need to remember that their wedding is just not that special to anyone else.

Is it definitely “wear black” and not black tie?

@viridiano I wouldn't go to the wedding, I don't have friends that shallow anyway (nor family), but if anyone went wearing a different colour I'd applaud them.

The reason I wouldn't go is not because I do/don't wear black, but because I would find the dictating so rude, I'd be embarrassed for them.

Love to see the photos though and the grooms Aunt Maud in her lilac suit and hat, that she wears to all wedding occasions, and Uncle Fred with his red check tie, that he loves and the brides face like a slapped arse, because trey didn't conform and now her special day is totally ruined because she can see other colours and that's going to mean a really bad insta image! !

It doesn’t matter what you think. This isn’t about you or your wish of a nice photo.

You wear black or you don’t go. Simple.

That's the spirit! Your wedding, your rules! Even if they are batshit! No one must question the bridezilla! 😆

Yes that’s what I was getting at earlier, black tie rather than “black”. Very different thing

I've seen lots of weddings like this on Instagram and I agree that they were summer weddings. In the winter it will.look like people have turned up for a funeral. Pictures just won't have the same effect as she wants. It's an invitation another a summons so if ypu don't want to go ypu simply don't have to. I think this is one where her family or friends should have said that it likely won't have the effect she was looking for in UK winter but if she is a bridezilla she would likely ignore anyway.

No, they mustn’t, because it’s nothing to do with them.

It’s their day, so you either go along with it or you don’t go.

It's still a milestone to me when I've supported the groom through his whole life.

The parents are paying for it.

I went to one a long time ago. The men were quite grumpy because not many owned a black suit, or had much use for one, so had to hire one. The woman were less bothered, probably because they were more used to having to buy stuff to wear to weddings. It looked a bit silly to be honest and I didn’t think it was worth the resentment it caused.

I don't like the sound of wedding guests becoming part of the colour scheme and I think it's really rude to tell people what to wear to your wedding (unless they're stupid enough to rock up in an all white dress or hot pants or something). You get to tell your bridesmaids / ushers what to wear - even then only if you pay for the dresses / outfits and even THEN, decent people want the people in their wedding to be comfortable in what they're wearing. We paid for all my BM dresses and ushers' suit hire but they didn't all wear the same. Some wanted different styles of dress or suit depending on their body shape.

I think a fair number of people attending will think less of the couple for telling people what to wear, whatever they might say openly.

But, if you turn up in a bright colour you'll look petty. The focus will be on you looking petty and not on the couple being annoying. I wouldn't do it.

I might ask if grey or navy would be OK. If they say no, either find a black outfit (borrow one?) or don't go.

Wow you sound really easygoing & like a fun guest!

Jeeze, it's one wedding. Just wear black ffs.

@PictureALadybird is be rolling my eyes so far at this, it wouldn't be true!

No, I wouldn't care about upsetting bridezilla one little bit!

I also as I've said before, wouldn't go and be telling the why!

Indoors but I've been told both the church and reception venue are not that warm so I need to wrap up to look after myself.

As someone mentioned below, if it's in a church then there may be uninvited well-wishers. Though I suppose they won't be herded up for the photos so it'll only be any shots inside the building which are insta-ruined.

I think people overthinking this somewhat.

It's a dress code. She's not asking everyone to attend naked.

It's a ludicrously restrictive diktat, not a dress code. And it's really rude. It's saying to your guests that their aesthetic is more important than their friends and their company. I couldn't get on board with it so wouldn't go.

For people who really like clothes and getting dressed up though, this is annoying. I wouldn't refuse to go or anything like that, but I love clothes and would be secretly thinking the bride was a mood hoover if she told me to wear all black (and yes, it is the bride apparently before anyone jumps up and down saying it's the groom too)

Ok then.
Maybe some meditation might help?

@DappledThings

In 9 short pages this poor Bride has been called pathetic, selfish, shallow, embarrassing, cringe, batshit… for asking people to wear a certain colour.

Honestly I wouldn’t want people at my wedding that would say that about me for something that’s really not the end of the world. I can’t believe people are getting so het up about a wedding that isn’t theirs/they aren’t invited to.

Hope your judgy pants are more comfortable than the black outfit you wouldn’t wear.