Asking employer to cover childcare costs

[Totupthenumberspls]

I’ve been asked to go on a business trip for a week, is it unreasonable to ask the company to pay the incremental childcare costs?

Also if this travel is pushed onto a person without children good luck with that as this is the sort of entitlement that turns people against parents when people have to pick up the slack

No!

People are pointing out if they go away for business their male partner who is the father of their children steps up and parents their children.

I also pointed out that my DP got his employer to pay for childcare when they decided they wanted him in on two occasions he had a scheduled day off. I had to do my part which was drop our DD off and pick her off. However he's done that for me.

In my experience business travel expenses are often way more than you actually spend - such as food, overnight expenses rate, travel etc so find out how much you are getting in expenses and I have no doubt some of what you "make" from expenses will just about cover childcare.
That's not how it works for many jobs.
My travel and hotel are booked by my finance team and I have limits on what I am claim for meals (£10 for breakfast, £10 for lunch and £15 for an evening meal) and I don't get given this money, it means that I can buy something up to that limit and they'll reimburse me.
I'm not 'making' any money other than the salary they pay me.

The point is that it's in your contract, so they can ask you to do it, and it is your role.

They aren't responsible for your childcare costs for meeting your job description.

It's irrelevant that it hasn't come up before - if it's in your contract then it's a reasonable expectation.

YABU to expect them to pay childcare.

@wubwubwub
You have a crystal ball do you ..... and know exactly what your life will be like in 2032???

Did you just not bother reading posts in full?

I explained (pretty clearly) - you won't know EXACTLY what your life will be like in 8 years. You can imagine it may involve DC, and if so, that your arrangements and possibly your job, will have to change.

As I said, I had a role pre-DC that was ultimately incompatible with small children - I changed roles. When I became a single parent with no support, I had to make very difficult choices to stay in work, and that entailed a) a role change and b) working at a different level and in a different way than I would have wished.

It's the reality of real life. Of course it can feel unfair. Lots of real life is unfair.

And that is the thing that causes people to hate working with parents

Please dont ask for your childcare to be paid - it will be a big black mark against women and maybe next time when they are recruiting they will choose the man. I have been in the corporate world for years and never heard of this. There are also two of you and presumably you chose to have children? Both of you?

What next? Pet care, costs for employing someone to look after an elderly parent in the evening when you are not here? I have both of these things and wouldnt dream of asking my employer to pay for these costs if I was asked to travel occasionally. I would of course expect petrol and hotel costs to be covered.

Also if she doesn't go and someone else has to go they will presumably pick a childfree person which will cause her to be hated when people realise that they have to pick up the slack for parents

No I just tend to get taken on by companies where many men do hands on parenting. (There is a link there somewhere.) Most of it is due to them having wives/partners who work in the NHS in patient facing roles or who are much higher earning.

So many holes in your argument/logic, @Totupthenumberspls

First you say you've been asked to go for a week, then it becomes 10 days. Which is it?

Next you say you and your partner share childcare 50:50, yet you then say it's you who does all the pick ups/drop offs

... but you also acknowledge that your partner could manage without you

Then you say your company is very 'blaze' (I think you mean 'blasé) about your contract, when very specifically - i.e. not blasé - it says:

unlimited hours, travel as required, location as deemed necessary

And go on to start about them profiting from you going on the trip. Well of course! The whole point of having employees in a business is to help the business make money!

Look. The cost of childcare is a cost to you of going to work. Just like the cost of travel. If you suddenly moved 200 miles away, because you prefer the new area/house, you wouldn't expect your employer to meet the cost of travel, would you?

You're making something out of nothing here. You have admitted that your partner can cope when you're away (for however long). So what is the issue? You're being awkward for the sake of it.

The expenses that would be justifiable to claim are those that are to do with the trip - so out-of-pocket expenses when you're there, like subsistence, client entertainment, travel to/from hotel, etc. And if the trip means you're away for a weekend, which would be the case for a 10 day trip, then you should be able to claim TOIL as well.

But to moan on about needing extra and unnecessary extra childcare is ridiculous.

My DP spent 3weeks working away in Asia, it wasnt a choice, its part of the job and expected. And while our children arent young, there were lots of additional costs as i dont drive and had to arrange transport for them. Never occurred to either of us to expect his company to pay.

WTF is this response?! Jeez.

@wubwubwub

You left a role without even asking if a small accommodation could be made?

Madness!

You really struggle with reading comprehension, don't you?

It wasn't a 'small' adjustment. There was simply no way the role was compatible with looking after 3 small children (one was a baby), with a dramatic change in financial situation, no support from ex, and trying to recover from an abusive situation.

Tbf, there is a wider context that the particular role was possibly not sustainable and may have changed anyway, meaning I may have needed to move roles or completely change the nature of my professional work but the personal situation preceded that.

I'm very glad you have no idea of what happens when you are suddenly in a very difficult situation with no support and dealing with trauma, and doing whatever you can to keep your head above water. 'Madness' is how I'd describe your inability to comprehend such situations.

What, @ChipsAreLife being a fair and decent employer makes you hate working with parents?

By trying to claim childcare costs, you are sending a signal that businesses should not employ people (normally women) with younger children.

What are you talking about?

I said that you should consider the implications of your contractual arrangements when you sign a contract and begin a job. I did this. When at a certain point I couldn't meet those arrangements, I recognise (in my case) I needed to find a new role (someone else may have needed to discuss possible role changes with their employer or whatever - the point being, yes, when you sign a contract you anticipate that there may be changes in the future that will mean you can no longer fulfill the contract in the same way and that you may have to change your approach or you role).

Why is that so hard for you to understand? Or are you wilfully misunderstanding?

How are they decent when people are punished for not reproducing

Exactly this.

She probably will. Regardless of whether they do or not. It's quite clear from her responses that the op is always right.

Not at all. Several posters have said this would be possible in their workplace. I'll be very pleased for OP if that's the case.

The point being made was - to expect her childcare costs to be covered is unreasonable. To have a mature, professional discussion with her manager about the challenges of this request, OP's preference, the business' preference and ultimate resolution - that's entirely reasonable.

That's totally different from OP's whinge about 'it's unfair i have to travel and not get my childcare paid for'.

As other posters have said, there may be an adaption e.g. increase in per diem rate, overtime or whatever, that would bridge this gap for OP. And that's great.

It's a big requirement, for her to go away so far and for so long - I'm all for appropriate compensation.

But that's again, different from 'pay my childcare because my child's father just won't or can't adapt his hours to do the pick ups and drop offs needed'. Amazed you and OP can't see this.

But supporting childcare costs while there is another parent around can alienate childfree people

Not a chance I am reading 17 pages but YABU asking employer to cover childcare costs, it's not their responsibility. However, when it was compulsory I attended an important meeting outside of work and I said I might struggle due to childcare my manager offered to pay for cover.

That's true too!

Why?

The money isn't going in the parents pocket it is going to a registered childcare provider.

@Hii93 how am I punishing people who are childless because I'm supporting people with children?

I also support an employee who is childless that suffers with depression by given them paid time off when they're not well. Am I punishing those without mental health issues?

I approach life that we are all human and things happen, we need to look at each person individually and decide whether it's worth supporting them or not to keep them around.

You can either work with people or against them. I know which option has helped me grow my company!