Sister won’t commit to booking holiday because of “threat of war”

[Posypointshoes]

I’m an anxious person. I worry a LOT especially about the way things are in the world at the moment. I can see how it can feel like things are pressing in on all sides.

however we have a special family birthday coming up and we are all supposed to be booking a special holiday abroad for it. It’s been in the works for a while we’ve sorted all the arrangements and now when it’s time to actually book my sister is saying she won’t commit because we just don’t know what’s going to happen with the world.
she’s panicking about war breaking out if we were on holiday and then what would we do?

as I said I am an anxious person. I’ve had some dark and scary thoughts about possibilities and what we could be facing but this just seems mad to me? Our parents are upset as it’s their occasion and now she’s the only one not going.

its also making me alarmed that she’s struggling with her mental health maybe more so than she’s letting on, if that seems like a logical reason not to book a holiday? She’s also stopped making plans further than a few weeks ahead as well. I don’t really know what to do about it, if it’s my place to try and how to approach it.

At the moment there is no threat of war which will involve our country (other than if we decide to get involved) and certainly not on the ground here.

Russia is bogged down in Ukraine, they can't be opening up any other fronts, and certainly won't attack anything EU as they know they will face a strong response they cannot handle.

The Israel / Palestine situation is in effect a bloody civil war, it will most certainly perpetuate hostilities between arab states and israel for decades, even centuries to come.

The world has always had wars raging somewhere, often very bloody, far bloodier than any of this.

The only real risk to our shores would be nuclear, but we've lived through 40 years or so of cold war threats and very tense moments.

The most worrying thing in my mind would be the threat of terrorist attacks if we got to deeply involved with a middle east conflict and were seen by groups out there as an aggressor - that is a real threat, that could happen, and of course has in the last 20 years.

I deal fairly regularly with a manufacturing company in Kyiv, and apart from some minor supply issues when part of their factory was damaged it has been business as usual, so life continues, even in a country at war.

But think of the millions of flights that are absolutely fine

This really made me laugh! One more day people, one more day…

Thank you PinkBelt, that made me lol halfway through a bad morning!

Just go ahead and book. That may encourage her to do the same.
She should have the choice not to come.
Holidays are a big deal and although I used tolove travelling it feels a lot of effort these days.

LOL or it might be Israel

I wouldn't worry about overflight of Iran with a major airline.

Due mainly to the effects on traffic flow of Russian airspace closures I suspect you might well route Iran>Pakistan rather than via Afghanistan.

I'm a bit like your sister - but I'm aware that I'm catastrophising. Lots of sensible suggestions on this thread that I should probably follow myself, like distraction, doing nice things for someone else to make you feel in control and like you're adding to things rather than draining them, far less news...

If I were indulging my 3am terrors (I have them in spades) I would avoid visiting Cyprus (base for current action) or states bordering Russia but certainly not Greece! In fact, I'm planning a post-GCSE trip there with my son myself.

I just wanted to take a minute to say thank you to PropertyManager for a very calm, balanced and sensible post here. I suffer from nuclear horrors and war fears myself and know they're almost certainly unfounded. This post is going to help me calm down as you've articulated what I know, deep down, and put it very sensibly.

While I understand her concerns, it does sound like her anxieties are taking over her life a little bit. I don't think there's really anything you can do about it though, unless you're particularly close and she's likely to listen to you? You can't force her to do something she's not comfortable with, so your options are limited.

I hope she changes her mind and you all get your family holiday together, but if not just enjoy it regardless :)

I wouldn’t worry about it, especially if you are flying one of the major airlines. Emirates/qatar airlines is the best and safest to use in that region. I’ve flown over and to those regions a lot over the years. I would avoid the likes of Aeroflot and maybe Pegasus though. And probably Ukraine air now. I have flown Ukraine air a lot in the past.

Nearby?

@637Niv You'll be grand

Greece seems perfectly fine to me but why not book somewhere in France instead where you can get a boat back if anything does kick off that affects holidaymakers in Greece - which I doubt.

Generally though, if she's an anxious person, I think sticking to places you can get home from without flying would be a reassurance. although I was really jealous of friends who got stuck in Florida for an exytra week, all paid for, whne the Iceland eruption grounded flights for awhile.

I always feel better knowing I can get train then Eurostar and in fact have done this before when I got a heavy head cold and didn’t want to fly home.

Glad to help

remember also that meglomaniac world leaders (think Putin) are interested in empire building, luxury lifestyle etc. They are quite happy with a non threatening (to them) war going on far away with guns and grenades (ie Ukraine), but pressing the nuclear button is endgame for them to. These guys are narcissists, they certainly won't want to destroy themselves. It's that mutually assured threat of wipeout that has kept us safe.

Is she aware that Russians are still going on holiday ?

Your sister has some serious mental health issues that need to be dealt with asap. Her anxiety and paranoia seems to be interfiering with her life. She needs professional help more than a holiday.

Unless required for a job, people really need to limit their news intake. 24 hours of disaster drip feed is causing anxiety in many people.

I agree her fears seem over the top. However, in the current world situation, anyone putting fingers in ears and going around saying lalalalalala nothing to fear- are either very naive, deluded or showing signs of the opposite mental issues.

I agree with others about avoiding the news altogether. I did it during Covid and never went back. Sick of the biased (Government propaganda) reports, dubious analyses, talking heads who often don't know what they are talking about, but like the sounds of their own voices, fearmongering, gaslighting, you name it.

I realised then that no matter what was going on in the world, me listening to it or watching it in real time was useless. There is absolutely nothing I can do about it, others will make that decision for us. I get breaking news alerts on my phone and if I'm interested enough I'll read about it, but it would take something domestically (to my abode) serious to make me care much anymore.

We will be alerted with the BIG ALARM on our phones if something drastic will affect us. The Foreign Office will tell you where is and isn't safe to visit via their travel advisories. So on with the show.

As my late father used to say about what to do in a possible nuclear attack " "Just put your head between your knees.... and kiss your arse Goodbye" Clever man, bless him.

Her sister has more chances of being run over by a bus, (assuming she lives in Central London lets say), getting ill or having a car accident than dying in a war, yet she chooses to obsess about a war which is the worrying part. Yes we live in a complex world and there's a few countries going through war (what's new?), we know which countries are dangerous so we are smart enough of not travelling there, is good to be have a sense of awareness, but obsessing about a non problem to the point that stops you from meeting your loved ones in lets say "France" is something that needs to be looked into with a professional.

Agreed, but some on here thought I was being OTT for saying I'd rather not go to Cyprus currently. Have they ever looked at a map, or studied the history of Cyprus, and know of the presence of UK Army bases there used to attack countries very close, and the close links to USA.

As said, a balance would make sense.

With regard to Cyprus and being OTT it’s a case of just how risk averse you are.

Current circumstances means there might be an elevated risk of a terrorist attack on somewhere like RAF Akrotiri but such attacks have happened there before due to various grievances/disagreements in the region.

I’m not sure how much more in reality the risk is elevated this year verses previous years, certainly when it comes to a holidaymakers flying into Paphos or Larnaka and holidaying in one of the many resorts, mainly on the southern side of the island.

Fair enough, we all make our own assessments. Personally, as there is a huge choice out there, why go to Cyprus which is VERY VERY close to brewing trouble, and at risk due to UK army base with weapons to attack middle-east.

I'm going to Italy, and Corsica.