AIBU to want more photos from my child’s nursery

[HelloWorld2577]

To keep it brief. I’ve had multiple children attend this nursery over the past 5 years. My daughter is now there and has been for the past two years.

When my other children attended the nursery they would do daily posts which included a mixture of individual posts with photos of just my child and group posts where you could see what all the class were doing. Either way they were updating the app (tapestry) daily or at the very least 3 out of 5 days a week.

My older child left there last year and since the posts have really deteriorated. I’ve just had a look and since coming back from Christmas (my daughter attends full time) there have only been 2 group posts, one of those posts she wasn’t in it, and one you could see the back of her head.

I know it may sound trivial but I find it very frustrating that they charge £75 a day and I don’t even get to see what my daughters doing at nursery, I also have mum guilt for working full time & some mornings she struggles to go in so would put me at ease to just see what she’s doing. I raised it with management after my older child left and said I wasn’t getting many photos or updates on the app and they simply said they don’t have time to do individual posts now so they are trying to take photos of all children to post on one group post. This itself I find an issue because there are usually between 50 and 80 photos per group post and then I have to go through every photo like a detective searching for the side of my child’s head! It’s frustrating. when I raised it previously they said they were trying to do a couple of group posts a week but as I said above they’ve only done 2 posts over the last 3 weeks.

AIBU? I really want to raise it again but I don’t want to be one of those parents!! I understand they’re busy but if every other nursery do it why can’t they? It just seems lazy?!

How do I bring it up AGAIN?!

But it's not a quick picture, you need the right angle, kid looking happy, no kids in background then uploading it etc etc. That's probably about 5-10 minutes x how ever many kids. Disturbing how many people on here can't do basic maths. I think if there's a dedicated person to do this then that's different, but I doubt there is and I doubt patents would want to pay extra for it either! It's also not a great thing for kids to see the teachers on a device all the time! If actually be annoyed getting several pictures a day, that would definitely suggest hours of someone's day

To be honest you do sound very unhappy with the nursery now. Perhaps it’s time to move on to a nursery that meets your expectations.

😲

Unbelievable! We are run off our feet, at the same time trying to help your child thrive without hurting themselves or others. All for minimum wage.

Your post is barely literate, but from what I can ascertain I think you are as insanely petulant as the OP.

I get that you like to see photos of your child (I do too) but honestly what would you prefer, the teachers are busy engaging with the children or that the teachers are busy with their phones out taking photos and ignoring children trying to talk to them while they are making sure they’re getting photos of every child individually?

It really is quite a simple choice, the adult is either taking photos and uploading them etc or they are interacting with the children. There has to be done communication of course but the new framework just recognises that the large amount of recording previously did not benefit the children and quite rightly prioritises adults being with the children rather than evidencing being with the child. There are not loads of spare adults so lots of recording is taking away time that could be spent with the kids. I think the best early years settings I have seen focus on what they believe is best for the children.

Uploading photos take time away from the children.

id much prefer my children to have their room staff with them, playing with them, encouraging them, nurturing them and guiding them , than having photos uploaded.

im so thankful that my children grew up in a time where internet, learning journals and social media wasn’t the norm. Hurray for conversations with key workers and to the staff that work hard and keep our children safe!

It’s a service you are paying for. They aren’t doing it. Then just keep harping!

especially better if you have a contract starting they do it.

75! phew that’s huge! I’d be making a bigger fuss.

I do think you are being a bit unreasonable. A lot of nursery and preschool workers are on minimum wage (or close to), and work really hard. I’m not surprised they don’t have time to take lots of photos for each parent.

My child’s nursery sends weekly updates and photos - but I do really think they go above and beyond. Their key worker usually sends this update in the evening after the work day has ended - she’s not getting paid for that time. If they said they could no longer do this, I’d be disappointed but I’d understand.

if you have concerns about your daughter, arrange a time to speak to the nursery about how she’s doing.

I agree with everything you have said re childcare settings. But gentle reminder - not everyone has an actual village, through no fault of their own.

@Isittimeformynapyet & yet your the forth person to respond to it.... if id known how popular it would be I'd have double checked the spelling 😂

As long as they are communicating in some form, and you get essential information,they are providing the service. You can always go somewhere else that spends less time with the children and more time taking and uploading photos . And sorry but that is absolutely what the choice is because staff taking and uploading photos are simply not spending time with the children.

It's only in very recent years that we are starting to understand the impact it is having on young people to grow up with their entire lives documented on camera. I think the first smart phone with a camera came out around 2000, and digital cameras became popular a few years before that. Now we are seeing the first generations who have grown up with everything recorded visually, and they then have to tackle the world of things like tiktok and social media, having already spent their entire lives with a camera always there, believing everything needs to be documented and shared. It has become the norm, because it is all they have ever known.

But we are also now dealing with a massive mental health crisis in children. We are seeing a massive increase in anxiety, and children worrying about things like body image and popularity at a much younger age. And you may not have any intention of sharing your child's photos on social media, but when every adult they see has a phone or tablet permanently in their hand ready to snap another picture or video, they are learning that recording and sharing their lives visually is clearly very important. So I am not surprised if childcare settings are now being encouraged to step back from this, and I think it's a really good thing if young children are able to have a period of their day spent around adults who are not holding tech.

It might seem like it's not relevant as a toddler is not yet going to understand the longterm implications, but the reality is that we are seeing a rise in self-harming and suicide attempts in children as young as primary school age, and this is the generation who grew up with all those extra photos and videos as 'the norm'. It's good that 'the norm' is now being changed back to a healthier mindset, even if it means you don't get to see as many pictures as you'd like.

It is so sad that we have a generation of children and teens who, as soon as anything even remotely interesting happens, their first thought is to get out the camera. Their enjoyment does not come from the moment and experience itself, but instead from how many likes it gets. And it's not their fault. We raised them with the camera always on them and then are surprised that they are addicted to social media and live their lives through their screens. Thank goodness ofsted is encouraging EYFS settings to back off from these things.

@NoThanksymm the service they are providing is childcare not a photo shoot. If they are following the correct guidelines they should be interacting with the children not constantly gathering evidence.

Those posters on here who still get numerous photos/updates should possibly ask if their setting are following the correct guidelines as your DC may not actually be getting the best childcare for their child’s development as it was shown this constant evidence gathering was not good for child’s development

Yes I am, thanks. The setting is absolutely brilliant.

Fucks sake 🙄

Except they're not following guidance... Hmmm

I work in a preschool. Each keyworker gets about an hour a week to concentrate on writing up observations/posting photos. If it’s not in our designated time slot then we can post pics and observations in quiet times, if we have a lot of children off for example. It is time consuming and the app we use isn’t the best, photos have to be selected one by one for example, which is ridiculous.

Some parents haven’t accessed the app in months so then you feel like you’re wasting your time! We can’t win. Ultimately our priority is ensuring children are safe, happy and learning.

Whilst it may not be their fault, their own children are ultimately their responsibility.

My dear friend moved to a different city and her husband lives in the city but is from another country. They have two kids and zero family near. They view nursery as their village, but were given a reminder that the feeling didn’t extend both ways when they were told in no uncertain terms that if they kept presenting their daughter unwell they’d be asked to remove her.

Not having a village is rubbish, but nursery and school don’t replace that. It’s not their purpose.

Oh I absolutely agree. Nursery and preschool aren’t your village, they’re professionals doing a job.

I just mean that not every one has or can find an actual village. Many people don’t live close to family and friends, and if you work the chances are you aren’t best friends with the PTA.

IYKYK

I can’t believe the amount of people saying ‘it just takes 5 minutes’ no it doesn’t! I have 13 key children that have to have one observation once a week so by the time I’ve wrote the observation, tagged the objectives, next steps, areas, edit the picture when someone’s in the background, it’s at least 3 hours that I have to do in my own time as I don’t get paid to do it. So I often spend my weekends working on top of doing courses outside of work unpaid. Also your £75 a day barely contributes anything, you clearly have no idea how much nursery’s cost!

I work full time including away from home from time to time. I understand mum guilt. But I'd much rather they prioritise my child's care than prioritise pacifying my guilt with photos.

I don't know why you're equating the "village" phrase purely with childcare for sick children. Your friends sound like piss takers. I used it in the sense that my children are there 5 days a week, so they are friends with the children, have good relationships with the staff (one or two of whom have done the odd bit of babysitting for us), we've made friends with some of the parents and indeed staff. In no way does appreciating them on a personal level mean we don't also appreciate them on a professional level.

And if our children are sick, then they're with a parent, as they should be.

Totally agree that it’s time consuming but you shouldn’t be doing it on your own time. It should be done in work, due to data protection and privacy.

if my work don’t give us time off the floor then it doesn’t get done.