Boyfriend wants to take my friend out on a date

[MayNov]

So, trying to keep this one short. My friend from out of town is coming to stay with me for a few days. My boyfriend has met her and gone out with us the last time she was in town. My boyfriend has taken a couple of days off work to go out with us.

I've mentioned I was going to do a gym&swim on one of the days she's here (I can spend up to 4 hours gymming & swimming) and my boyfriend said he'll ask my friend whether she wants to go on a long walk and for a lunch at the local pub with him. I said that would make me feel uncomfortable, he said he doesn't see any reason why this would make me feel uncomfortable.

Aibu to insist this would make anyone feel uncomfortable?

Why doesn’t OP not drip feed and put all relevant info in first post.

just a crazy idea

@Lwrenagain Honestly, it's lunch and a walk, not a mooch around Ann summers and bag of coke.

😜 This made me properly LOL.

This. My DP loves my mates but says he doesn't want to sit around listening to us talking crap for hours on end over several bottles of wine😂And likewise if I was going to see / stay with a friend to catch up, I would be pretty pissed off if her BF / DH took time off work to spend with us!!! Especially if they'd only been together 6 months!

stop being a lazy odd bod.

This.

Unless you have a medical condition that means you need to keep doing this.

As a kid I spent holidays with my aunt. She had a back problem, so when I stayed she cut back her gym use, but would organise a fun activity for me on one day whilst she went.

In which case I think it's lovely your boyfriend is offering to step up. And no, it's not a date.

Presumably your husband had met your best friend more than once!
That said, grabbing a bite to eat afterwards would've been one thing, the pair of them going out for dinner and drinks together is bizarre 🤣

Unless you have a medical condition that means you need to keep doing this.

...

Yeah so your update changes things somewhat. I'd think it a bit odd in a relationship so short for him to take time off work tbh - seems a bit keen..

Are they friends on social media or anything?

I suppose in that sense it's different, they've known each other years and definitely nothing dodgy going on. They ate and had a beer in a whetherspoons, hardly the ritz lol x

It not about being lazy, it’s called being efficient.

No, you are the unreasonable one not adjusting your diary when a friend is coming. He sounds lovely. It's not a romantic proposal - it's a practical one. Why are you being so dramatic about this?

This

I think it’s odd he’s booked time off work for your friend’s visit and this would probably frame the rest of my feelings towards this.

If they had "full sex" I would draw the line for sure.

Yup!

I quite agree.

it would be more efficient of people if they took the time to read all the OP's posts.

Is bf not booking time of work because OP is also? Do you work OP?

No, OP is taking the time for her medical situation.

Why not just cancel it @MayNov until the pain is more manageable?

It’s probably preferable than leaving them to shag in your bed for four hours

Except she did mention that her friend would normally go with her or go shopping.

I think in the instances of most normal people / relationships, the following would apply:

1. DP / DH would take visiting BF for lunch / go to cinema / for a coffee IF I asked him to and IF he was free during this time. However BF would be perfectly happy left to her own devices if I needed to be elsewhere for a few hours and DP / DH wasn't around. He isn't hired help FFS.

2. DP / DH would not use his annual leave to spend time with my BF. Likewise I do not and would not use holidays to spend time with DP / DH's friends (unless we had a day out or something booked). Nor would DP / Dh want me hanging around with him and his mates when they're catching up!

3. DP / DH spending time alone with BF is not an issue at all when they know each other and get on well. I love that my DP /DH gets on well with my mates. However DP / DH offering to take time off work to spend time with my BF who he has met ONCE is weird. Very weird.

Why on earth would you go for a gym and swim whilst your friend is there?!
He's probably trying to be polite so she's not at a loose end.

No I wouldn't mind this at all but neither would I trot off on a 4 hour gym and swim when I was expecting company.

If it were me I'd be grateful that my boyfriend was prepared to do that so my friend wasn't left at a loose end. Although to be honest I would probably not spend so long at the gym if I had a friend staying and would either do a hike with my friend or swim together if I really needed to get in some exercise!

Did you read anything the OP wrote beyond the opening post?

I find it a bit strange that your boyfriend of 6 months has booked time off work to see your friend that he's only met once