To take time off work to care for DH with gastro

[Fanningme]

I'm due to do a shift tomorrow at work . DH has started with some kind of D & V - It seems pretty bad. I don't think I could go to work knowing DH is at home vomiting with no adult to take care of him - I'd be constantly worrying. My teenager will be in but will probably be asleep mosr of the morning. DH is saying he wants me to stay home to take care of him.

Assuming he's still vomiting tomorrow morning is it reasonable for me to miss work to care for him as I am not ill. Would it be on an unpaid compasdionate leave basis? Sorry - I've never been in this position before.

unless he had additional needs that meant he wasn’t able to physically sort himself out I can’t imagine this would go down well in most work places. Is he expecting you to stay at home and mother him like a sick toddler?

I wouldn't stay home if DH just had the shits, but if he was vomiting as well then I would think about it, especially if it was likely to be simultaneously.

If any accidents occured and something didn't find it's way into a relevant receptacle, then at least I would be on hand to clear up, get bedding into washing machine etc. If I were that unwell, I would appreciate knowing someone else was around.

I certainly wouldn't hover over him, I would most likely be downstairs doing other chores/putting my feet up and he would be upstairs in bed.

If I were that unwell, I would appreciate knowing someone else was around.

He's got the runs. Chances are he'll spend the day sat on the loo playing Royal Flush.

He's a grown man, not a child. He doesn't need you.

If I were your employer, I'd take a very dim view.

I think you need a reality check.

This is quite mad.

Tell him to get a grip.

He’s a grown man fgs, not a 5yo boy.

The OP clearly says he is vomiting as well, not just the shits.

I clearly said if it was just the shits I wouldn't stay home, but I would think about it if it was vomiting and shits simultaneously.

Nice day off work then

Unless he's got dysentery he should be able to manage alone. It's lovely you want to help him but realistically there's little you can do anyway. Go to work.

Well you can if you want but you certainly wouldn't get paid for it in my place. Maybe a days holiday though if you wanted to .

I recently had to look after my toddler who also had D&V by myself with D&V, it was so bad that I had to sit with a bucket on the toilet and she had to sit in the bath, it was an atrocious time but just had to get on with it.

He’s a grown man and I am sure he will be fine.

Don’t be so bloody ridiculous.

How do you think adults who live alone and get rummy bugs cope?

The only way it would be acceptable would be if he was otherwise disabled or you had young children to take care of.

And why can’t he make it to the toilet to vomit? A vomit bucket should be a contingency and not the norm. Also stay away from it unless you want the bug too

Really? Maybe I'm really harsh. I wouldn't expect him to look after kids in that state but a grown man can position himself over a toilet and sink at the same time.

Unless it's a massive house and they are actually in different rooms.

The teenage kids do not need to be involved in any way in this (literal) shit show.

Not really. It's my choice how I use my annual leave.

The OP asked what others would do. I said I would think about it. What's your issue with that?

Same and a baby as well. My husband would not come home from work, even though I was struggling with the kids. However when he got it a few days later and I was at work he called my work switchboard for me to go home!!! The nerve

No additional mobility needs. I guess someone to empty his vomit bucket, get his paracetamol and mop his brow is what he'd require

Is this a joke???? Mop his brow? 🥴

How often is he passing a motion and vomiting?
Is he keeping water down?
How long has he had it?

We don't have a massive house but the toilet and sink aren't next to each other, so if you are sat on the loo and suddenly need to vomit you are buggered, unless you remembered to pick up the vomit bucket from beside the bed on your dash to the loo.

This is the strangest post I have read on here I think.

OP - AIBU Everyone- yes

OK I'll see how he is tomorrow then 😂

He's a grown man, go to work FFS. What sort of man asks you to take a day off to look after him when he has d&v.

Oh blimey, I would never consider asking someone to 'look after me' if I had noro. Why would I be selfish enough to expose them to whatever is coming out of me? As long as I can get to the bathroom it is completely unnecessary

I'm awaiting my gallbladder being removed.
Most days I vomit, plus severe diarrhoa. I live alone.. and I'd hate, loathe anyone around me seeing me like this! It can be scary when the pain is severe.. I can black out from it.. but I just deal with it the best I can. I also go to work every day.. so often I'm dealing with it in the work loos. Not fun. (first aid guy seeing me without my top on the other day as I'd overheated having
an episode.. and covered in vomit.. poor man!)
But my point being, he's a grown man.. I'd hate someone fussing around me
when I'm evacuating the building, so to speak... (nor would I want to be around a partner doing it)

Or maybe just turn around. I think most toilets are multipurpose for vomit as well as poo these days.

Hopefully it will have eased off by the morning, a stomach bug doesn't normally last too long. Do keep an eye on temperature, if he's able to pass urine, able to walk ok, no rashes, occasionally it's not just a sickness bug but an infection or sepsis.

Lovely 🤣