To think we need to find a way to infiltrate the dog cult?

[dogsdilemma]

I'll start by saying I favour cats but love all animals. I don't want a dog just now because I find them tying. Would date someone who had one because, contrary to what I'm about to say, I like them and it wouldn't be my responsibility.

But the obsession drives me nuts. It seems no one can own a dog in a normal way anymore. As in I have a dog, the dog is a pet not a person, dogs aren't god-like solve all creatures, it's fine if not everyone loves my dog as much as me - like I am with my cat.

Someone gets a puppy and I go to their house - all conversation is about the puppy and I'm expected to fuss like they've just given birth. I can't say 'ah I've actually come to catch up with my friend, not have endless chat about the puppy's sleep schedule and whether or not it shat in the house today' because their dogs are their babies, so I should treat them as such.

Instagram accounts for dogs - captions written like 'my mum took me for a walk today, I had so much fun'. Only mildly cringy but wtf? Are you a springer spaniel mother or Katie from uni?

I do an exercise class and the owner has a puppy. She brings him along so he's not home alone. At least 15 minutes of the session I've paid for is always taken up by the hive mind fussing the puppy. Everyone loves dogs so no one minds apparently - except I DO mind. If I say this though I'm gonna be the dick.

I'm OLD, and every other profile says 'must love dogs'. I do love them but don't want one, and if I say this it's like I've confessed to being Hitler in a past life. Cue messages trying to change my mind, as though not being obsessed with dogs is a moral failure. I love my cat but wouldn't rule out someone who doesn't feel the same?

The final nail in the coffin. I've been dating someone new. Had an absolute shitter of a week so far - nothing he can help with, not really serious, just work stuff. His response is 15 pictures of his dog being cute to cheer me up. He's just trying to be nice but I do not get it. I wouldn't expect pictures of my cat to cheer anyone up except, maybe, me. I'm being narky but I actually found it so so irritating and cannot even fake enthusiasm to reply. If I say 'awwww cute, thank you' he'll continue with this approach. If I say 'cute but why would your dog cheer me up ha' I'm gonna look like a knob.

I have no problem with others doing what they want to do but recently it is infiltrating everything. I know there are worse issues but ffs it's so annoying - what is this dog cult and how to we stop it? Can I tell this lovely man I'm dating that I actually have little interest in his dog?!?!?

Thanks so much @peachgreen and others.

For what it's worth, I do think the death of a pet is desperately sad for its owners.

I thought initially this was a light hearted thread (and I'm sure the OP meant it that way)

However I did want to clarify that to those of us who have lost a human child that thread titles that make us think a child has died are inappropriate.

I love my cat dearly and if a thread on here said for example
"Need a handhold, beloved pet has passed away" I would be amongst the first to empathise , but it's wrong and triggering for it to be passed off even unwittingly as the death of a child.
There is literally no comparison.

I'm glad some posters are able to see the sense in that.
Thanks x

My posts have not gone against any guidelines, I have read through them thoroughly, so I will be asking for the reason for the deletion, and also reporting the insensitive posts that have upset me, since we're going to go down that road. As I've said, the only person being insensitive and cruel was her. If she behaves that way when a thread upsets her, then she shouldn't read them. It's unfair on others.

You are again insulting a poster who is upset that you continue to say (by saying you can't tell people how to grieve) that pet death is in any way comparable to child death.
Worse you're not even comparing an untimely death of a dog, say by another dog attack, but actual death of children to death by old age of dogs. The fact you can't see that is concerning.

@Boomboom22 I am honestly at a loss here as to how you continue to try to frame me badly in this when I've said absolutely nothing wrong. It has honestly left me feeling utterly horrible. I suffer with severe mental health problems anyway and this has sent me spiraling.
I have not "continued to insult" anyone. The thread started out bashing people like myself, so I made some relatively light hearted comments in my own defence. But out of nowhere this lady brings infant death (!) into it and comments on how other people should be able to grieve, seek comfort on a forum and talk about their pets, making it about her which I said this was insensitive. Please can you tell me how that is acceptable and how any of that is my fault? Not once had I, nor anyone else in this thread (yes I have trawled through every page!) said that losing a pet is the same as losing a child. No one even mentioned death before her. Every post I have seen from the pet lovers is positive. It feels to me like this has reached the point of bullying. Not to mention off topic.

I never understood the dog cult until I joined it to help a relative out. Fell in love, fully paid up member forever

Completely agree @Helena91 - you've done nothing wrong.

@Helena91 you are being disingenuous. Over and over you have said she is insensitive when it is the framing of a dog death like a child's that is insensitive. Hence why your post and other posters who said the same were deleted.

By saying beachcity is invalidating others grief over their pets you are clearly saying people do have the right to be equivalently upset over a dog, and then bashing people who have lost children over the head with this heinous view over and over. And saying they are insensitive for being offended by a truly offensive point, that the grief is in any way comparable.

I need to get off Mumsnet. This place is getting more and more batshit.

@Helena91

No. You're the only one behaving like a bully.

And your posts broke talk guidelines & are at best frankly bizarre.

It is against the forum rules to continually argue with the decisions of the moderators.

Your posts have been deleted for good reason.

Now just stop.
You're acting obsessed.

Drop it.

@beachcitygirl My posts have not been deleted, just the one where I replied to you, the rest are still there, and with many thanks I might add. I haven't argued with any moderator, not once, I haven't bullied anyone either. I honestly feel quite intimidated by you, so I would ask that you stop replying to me thank you. I've said what needed to be said and self advocated, you might not like it, but that's that.

I feel triggered and bullied by you.
Stop referring to me & my post.

My post was not TO you, not ABOUT you and your obsessing over it & continually referring to me & my post is weird.

Now I've asked you to drop it & i will state plainly

I do not want you to engage with me or my posts ever ever again.

Thank you.

Namaste

It’s easy to be flippant on the internet sometimes and easy to forget there’s a human on the other end.

It might be best that we all move on from the topic as I don’t think we’ll get to an agreement here.