Would you have a baby at 50?

[pumpkinpatch6]

Off the back of the "Do you regret having a baby at 40" thread, would you have a child at 50 assuming you can provide for it emotionally and financially? Obviously medical assistance would be needed.

Of course I would if I was lucky enough to be still able to concieve at 50.

Really ? Number of babies born to women over 47 without fertility treatment was single figures per year for the whole of the UK last time I checked. It is incredibly unusual.

I imagine that if I had no children I would probably still really want one at 50 but at that point I think it would be unfair on the child. A baby would probably be easy enough to look after but running around after a toddler all day every day? I’m almost 30 now and I can’t see me being able to do what I do now with a child (I have a 2 year old) in 20+ years time 🤷‍♀️ If I’m a grandparent in that time then I’m sure that will be fun but full time childcare (as much as I love having a little one and probably would love having one at all ages) would be a lot more difficult and would most likely limit the child’s experiences too. If my child at 10 wants to go on rollercoasters and waterslides with me then I can most likely do that with them but would I be able to do that at 60? A lot less likley I think 🤔

6 babies born to women 45 and over in 2020 ( last year of complete data).

https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/conceptionandfertilityrates/datasets/childbearingforwomenbornindifferentyearsreferencetable

Why 'of course'? Genuinely interested

I stand corrrected it is 6/1000 so 0.6 % however than includes fertility treatment.

70 isn't that old. I'm nearly 77 and don't need any special care. Nor does my husband, 80. In any case, no way do we expect our two sons (mid-late 40s) to look after us. They have their own lives to lead and good that they do.

Not a chance! I’m 36 now and won’t have any more! If I had one at 50 my eldest would be 31 😂

That seems a bit low to me. I had children aged 43 and 47, naturally. I was surprised to find that another mum living in our road had her (slightly older) children in her mid to late 40s also, the second one also as a rather welcome surprise (after age 47).

Therefore, I'd be amazed if, for the whole of the UK, there were less that 10 babies born per year to women aged 47+, that had been conceived naturally.

Mind you, we did see a fertility specialist at one point, to see why we had had 3 miscarriages; the doctor told me that I would never have children; when we went back for the follow up appointment, I had fallen pregnant naturally. So I don't know whether that would count as "fertility treatment"?

Absolutely not. I had one at 40 and it has almost broken me. Fine for the first few years, I felt invincible, but trying to parent a primary aged child whilst deeply peri-meno and with worries about my very elderly parents is pretty much killing me. I don't have the patience, or the urge to nurture anyone, anymore.

This is completely incorrect. Not single figures at all. Many more than 9 children were born to parents 50 and over last year. What an odd thing to say!! Where are you getting your data?

Not a chance.

@Newchapterbeckons

Oh give over. Take your judgement elsewhere.

Well I would hardly give up my own child. I have relatives who had children late 40s and 50 and they did just fine.

Wow. The whole ‘if your kid went to nursery you didn’t raise them, someone else did’ is still being trotted out in 2024?! Fuck me. 😂

@Neurodiversitydoctor your figures are very far from correct

Babies born to women aged 45 and over rises by a third - BBC News

This mentions how many babies were born to mums 45 and over in 2009 (1578), my DS was one of them! The numbers have increased since then.

Fuck me, there’s a whole little band of posters who actually believe that women who have careers don’t raise their children. And another poster slating a working mother for using a ‘whole army of hired help’.

What the actual fuck? I laughed earlier but really, it’s really not funny.

So backwards.

Fuck you. We have taken a chunk of summer off to be with our children day in day out. We get them up and out in the morning. We pick them up every night, do dinner and reading and bath and bed. We put them back to bed in the middle of the night. We worry about them and take them to the doctors and talk to them in the car and take them to all their basketball and football and swimming and other activities, we make them do their piano practice. We (ok, my Dh) have organised play dates with his future classmates for my middle dc starting school, I’m planning the play date for dc3s bday with a few friends from her amazing childcare. I turn up if my dc need me. I turn up if childcare need me as I am one of the parents who volunteer on the committee that runs it. I duck out on wfh days and use my break to go to school assemblies, I go to sports days. Fuck you and your you aren’t really parenting your child. Dh and I work full time in busy jobs and we are great, dedicated, hands on, loving parents to our dc. They eat home cooked foods, they learn basic chores, they are very loved.

How can we ever expect the rest of the world to value women and their choices, when women still hold these sorts of views against one another? It would be laughable if it wasn't so sad.

TBH I had a similar discussion with the consultant I'm under during my high risk pregnancy, about guilt that she carries because of other women's views about her continuing on with her career. Sad that her job is supporting women to have healthy babies, and much of the judgement she has received has been from those very same patients.

Indeed. It's not funny, but then I have often thought many on MN hate successful, high-earning women.

Any fit responsible adult can do those things with a child. It does not have to be the person who gave birth to the child.

God forbid any woman should aspire to anything beyond her biological destiny......

Ignore that sanctimonious poster. They’re either bitter they don’t have a career or privileged enough that they don’t need one. Either way, their viewpoint is bollocks, backwards and should be pitied.

I must admit to assuming the ones who post such nonsense are actually just bitter at not having any success and perhaps resentful and so portray being SAHMs as the only true way to parent, while harbouring bucketloads of internalised misogyny.