Lodgers boyfriend using our address

[cosmobrown]

We have an annex which we rent out.
Our lodger, (lets call her Mary) asked if boyfriend can stay over every so often. We said yes, as long as he didn't add significantly to electric bill or wear and tear etc. All happy.
Mary's post gets delivered through our main door and we pop it into the annex. No problems from anyone.
BUT, for the second time, I have received post for boyfriend. I assume it is the boyfriend, as the initial is correct, but I do not know boyfriends surname.
I feel as though boyfriend shouldn't be using our address.
AIBU?

He definitely shouldn’t be using your address.

As you don’t actually know it’s the boyfriend you could ask Mary if she knows who the letter is for.. and then tell her that he will need to stop using your address.

If it persists after you could just return to sender, not known at this address.

I would be concerned about why he needs to use a different address. If he’s in financial difficulties you don’t want him linked to your address.

Ask her what's happening surely?

As an aside, if it's an annexe, is it a self contained flat? In which case she's not a lodger, she's a tenant with full tenancy rights as a non-assured tenant....

I got my mum a subscription to a magazine which is delivered to her address but with my name on. It was a gift for her and the magazine is hers, but I set it up wrong and still haven’t got around to fixing it. Could it be something like that?

Send it back as 'not known at this address' and then ask her what his surname is.

Lodger or tenant?

Lodger. Not tenant.

Has he moved in too..

You don't know it's for him, so I would return to sender as not known at your address. Or, you can open other people's mail if it's to try and identify them to pass the mail on. Perhaps open one and have a look to see if there is any other identifying info. It would perhaps be useful to see what kind of mail he's potentially having sent to your address. Or, just ask her and if it's his tell her he can't have mail sent to your address and to have it changed ASAP.

Yes, I’d be tempted to not pass it on.

I'd just go over and hand them to the lodger and ask if she knows whose letters they are.

I would open it.

YANBU but just ask Mary not to have her boyfriends post delivered to your address

Just ask Mary if it's for her boyfriend and if so, why it's being delivered to your house.

There might be a good reason for it. If there isn't, then just ask that it doesn't happen again, but honestly if it's a one-off I'm not sure I could bring myself to be massively fussed.

Don't open it before you check that. If it's not for him, simply mark it as return to sender. Job done.

The first thing that I would do is to ask Mary and find out what she knows. If it is bfs post ask her to stop it coming through. Then, follow through with your threat to send the post back.

It's coming through your front door so you have the power to stop it. It's annoying but if you continue denying the addressee their post, they will take steps. You are also allowed to open the envelope to set the record staight.

Depends what it is I guess, if it’s bank statements or legal stuff I’d be concerned but if it’s just something he’s bought off Amazon then I don’t see the harm.

So you live in the annex with her or she lives in your house with you?

RTS, not known at this address. He'll soon stop when he realises nothing reaches him.

And if you RTS, he can't try to take out any credit at that address.

Self contained annexe? Non assured tenant, NOT lodger. https://help.openrent.co.uk/hc/en-gb/articles/9460943738641-Annexes-Tenancy-Type-Multiple-Dwelling-Relief-and-Council-Tax

As for the bf using the address, this is not ok.

Sounds like a tenant if they're living in a separate annex.
https://www.duncanyeardley.co.uk/news/general-news/whats-the-difference-between-a-tenant-and-a-lodger/#:~:text=A%20'lodger'%20that%20occupied%20an,likely%20to%20be%20a%20lodger.

Completely unacceptable.

Return the post to sender and have a firm talk with your lodger.

Just pass it on

He's using his girlfriend's address

Why the storm in a teacup?

Lodger lives in the same house as you and used your kitchen and bathroom... tenant has separate kitchen etc. Sounds like a tenant. Re the post talk to your tenant who post belongs to, if boyfriend say he doesn't live here so to not to use the address. Return to sender an option too

Don't hand them over. He can use as proof of address. Return to sender and state that he doesn't live there

if the “annexe” doesn’t pay its own council tax, then they are lodgers as they are not deemed two seperate oroperties.

thsts one of the main pointers to determine lodger or tensnt

He's using the OP's address!