Should i be concerned about the boy next door

[Jacksmom4eva]

HI just looking for some advice please. There is a little boy living next door in a flat with his parents but hes never been seen! We hear him playing in frontroom and all over xmas hes been laughing and playing games from the sound of it but we share a back gate and in 3 months i've lived here no-one has seen him, they keep curtains closed and go to bed quite early (8ish), neither parents go to work and not talkative if u see them.

Would u be concerned ?

If you have any concerns, then yes, you should report them.
It's everyone's legal duty to report safeguarding concerns.

Refer to Children Services OP.

You do not need to try and guess if the child is neurodivergent, disabled, shy, homeschooled or any of the many possibilities that have been listed here as reasons why the child is never seen.

That is the job of trained social workers who will undertake a home visit and carry out an assessment - this could be quick because there are no concerns or it could lead to more intervention with the family. Either way, you will have done the right thing.

I disagree.

If the agrophobia was having a significant impact on the child then social services would potentially get involved. If it led to neglect for example.

However this is clearly not the case for the OP’s neighbours as they are seen out.

Their child could be 4 and not yet of school age.

Nothing wrong with them avoiding speaking to people. Do they speak English? Also nothing wrong with having the curtains shut, I rarely open my blinds. Also nothing wrong with going to bed at 8pm (could just be the child going to bed at 8pm and the parents turn the lights off to watch TV, you wouldn’t necessarily hear the parents).

You heard the child happy and playing, maybe he just hasn’t been out much during the winter.

If you want to ask for a welfare check then go ahead as it’s better to be safe than sorry but it sounds ok to me.

Had the op answered if the boy goes to school ?

Surely this is the deciding factor to if he is being looked after ?

If he goes to school I'm sure he is fine

She said on page 1 he doesn’t go to school.

Agreed. Everyone is outraged when something goes wrong- "No one cared/noticed/bothered"

Trust your gut instinct. I think you are right to be concerned. No harm in a welfare check.
You could really regret it if something was amiss and you hadn't reported it in time.

Oh my goodness I can't believe some of the replies I am reading. Have we all learned nothing from the terrible reports of child abuse/ neglect, particularly over lockdown.

OP is right to be concerned-well done to you for caring !! Ring social services with concerns for a welfare check. If there is nothing untoward then fine- but... you might just save a little boy from misery or worse or it might be parents just need a little extra support- maybe there is MH issues? . Perhaps some posters need to remember we are all responsible for our most vulnerable members of society and I'm sure SS would rather you ask them to check in on parents then keep it to yourself. If your wrong so what?
Definitely report OP x

If you're concerned then get in touch with Children's Services, at worst it'll be a false alarm with good intent, at best it could save the child's life.

OP, you are right to be concerned. It may even be the case that the family need a little help, and would welcome a welfare visit from social services. Make a call.

There are too many cases in which neighbours suspected something was not right, but never did anything.

You are wrong. Home educating parents are required to provide a suitable education for their child, but they are not required to register themselves with their local authority. There is no register of home educated children.

The point people seem to be missing here is that OP is more than welcome to report to SS, but SS are highly unlikely to investigate on the basis of "I never see my neighbour's child".

It's odd that the neighbours will go to such lengths to avoid interaction with neighbours yet use what sounds like a communal drying area. In winter.

Why is her 16 year old not in education or training? I'm guessing not in full time work either. The neighbours probably don't see the teen much either.

I think it's weird the boy's parents don't pick up their deliveries that end up with neighbours. What happens to those deliveries? Maybe the boy does leave the house but OP hasn't witnessed this. If he actually doesn't leave the house a few days a week then that is odd.

Please do call. The child may be completely neglected, starved, never taken outside or to school. What harm can it do just to check? I think it's NSPCC you can call anonymously.

I am a Safeguarding Officer, please report this, contrary to what some believe you won’t start an emergency response if it’s not required. Social Work will simply make some discrete inquiries with professional services MASH ( Multi Agency Support Hub , if they are aware of a child and parents are engaging as normal, ie registered with doctor/ dentist, no police call outs etc they will simply log it incase of future concerns.
However by not acting you could be putting this child at ongoing risk, there is a reason so many horrendous child protection cases come to light that are hiding in plain sight, abusers rely on the “ don’t be nosy” approach

For the thousandth time, not attending school is not, on its own, a safeguarding concern.

I would call it in to my local child social services department. It might be nothing but I couldn't not do anything. Despite what people think social services are actually there to help people who need it. I would imagine they would make some discrete enquiries to begin with.

I'm sure I remember on the news in the Shannon Mathews case the neighbours said they thought they heard a child in the uncles flat but didn't do anything about it.

@LuckyVoila it's not on its own, that's the point.

I don't see what else it is. OP is not watching the house 24 hours a day so has no idea whether or not the child is taken out and about. I doubt my neighbours see much of my own DC but we do go out.

It might not be a safeguarding concern in itself, I know lots of people homeschool children in lovely family homes.

however if there is abuse going on at home, having to attend school every day is a protective factor for children, as it means that a teacher might pick up on something and call social services. Also abusers have to send children into school fed and clothed and with a lunchbox 5 days a week to avoid being questioned by anyone. And they can't send children into school covered in bruises either.
Think of that poor child called Arthur, if lockdown never happened he may still be alive.

So if I had a concern about a child that was being homeschooled I'd be more inclined to report it, as it would be much less likely that anyone else would be keeping an eye on the child like a teacher, and so I'd feel the responsibility fall to me.

@Lovelylovelyyy in her other thread the OP says her 16 year old is not in education or full time work (has a Saturday job).

The 16 year old is autistic and depressed so presumably spends most the week at home, the OPs kitchen window looks onto the neighbours' window which has the curtains closed all the time.

The logical explanation to me seems like the 16 year old looking across has made the family want more privacy and so they close those curtains.

OPs other thread is about her benefit fraud...I don't understand why she is being so judgemental about this family.

@Balloontree you Don't know if any of that is true and wading through someone's posts to use as evidence against them is bad form.

OP doesn't have any real evidence that her neighbours are abusing or neglecting their child and is gossiping about it with the whole block of flats (whilst by her own admission committing benefit fraud). I'd say that's far beyond 'bad form'.