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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be a bit miffed at receiving alcoholic gifts for Christmas when pregnant?

113 replies

whomoon · 30/12/2023 18:19

We announced to our family I was pregnant a few weeks ago, mentioning that would mean I can’t drink alcohol and enjoy some of the usual
Christmas goodies I’d usually have.

I remember specifically saying to my dad ‘that means I can’t have alcohol in the hamper you put together for us’ because in my mind, why gift alcohol to a pregnant woman who can’t drink? I am hoping to breast feed so won’t be able to drink for a while afterwards either.

Then on Christmas Day, I had a bottle of Prosecco from each my dad and my DH’s aunt, who also knows I’m pregnant.

prosecco is best drunk within a year. I’m a bit miffed that I can’t enjoy my present, and my DH doesn’t drink Prosecco. I also don’t ‘host’ much and wouldn’t offer to guests. So I will have to regift.

Am I unreasonable to be a bit miffed of receiving a gift I can’t enjoy? The Prosecco from my DH aunt was bottled in 2022 so I expect she just gifted from her wine cellar, so I’ve got even less time to drink that.

Miffed is the strongest I feel about this btw, I’m mostly curious what others think on this being a gift to give to a pregnant woman?

OP posts:
TestingTestingWonTooFree · 30/12/2023 18:20

It’s a bit thoughtless. I’d give it back if that wouldn’t offend.

Dancingfairydreams · 30/12/2023 18:23

Perhaps they'd already brought the gifts if you only told them a couple of weeks before Xmas? Just stick it in the cupboard & drink it when you can!

Menomeno · 30/12/2023 18:24

Maybe they don’t know there’s a shelf life? Maybe they thought your DH would enjoy it?

enchantedsquirrelwood · 30/12/2023 18:25

Why is it thoughtless? Just drink it after you've given birth! You absolutely can drink alcohol when breastfeeding, I had a glass of prosecco the night I came home from hospital.

In any event if you've only just announced that you are pregnant in the past few weeks they'd probably already bought it.

You don't have to regift and I am sure the prosecco will be just fine in 18 months' time anyway.

enchantedsquirrelwood · 30/12/2023 18:26

Also it's probably relevant to note that the only reason that there isn't a safe limit for consuming alcohol in pregnancy is because it would be unethical to carry out a study to see what the safe limit is. So "they" simply say there isn't one.

The odd glass of prosecco would not harm your baby.

Hope your pregnancy goes well and you enjoy the prosecco once the baby is here!

LikeItOrLumpIts · 30/12/2023 18:27

You can drink whilst breastfeeding.

Prosecco will be absolutely fine in a year, 2 years, etc.

Tbh I think you’re making a bit of a fuss.

Originalusername89 · 30/12/2023 18:27

You can eat and drink as normal while breastfeeding. By the time you've drunk enough to affect the baby you're to drunk to be looking after an infant anyway.

I think you're being a bit precious, just stick it in a cupboard and enjoy it after the birth

tennesseewhiskey1 · 30/12/2023 18:28

YABU and precious.

TheBirdintheCave · 30/12/2023 18:29

This happened to us. We got a bottle of Prosecco for our anniversary plus a box of alcohol infused chocolates and two bottles of gin for Christmas. All givers have known that I'm pregnant since September. It's such a strange and thoughtless gift to me!

WashItTomorrow · 30/12/2023 18:31

YANBU. I’d be a bit depressed if someone bought me alcohol as a gift. It’s very thoughtless of the giver.

malificent7 · 30/12/2023 18:38

I had this whenI told everyone I was cutting down on booze. Bottles of wine. Weird.
When I was pregnant I got lectured about what to put in my body. Also weird.

zigzag716746zigzag · 30/12/2023 18:41

YABU if you only told them a few weeks ago. Most people will have bought the majority of gifts before December.

YANBU if you told them back in October.

YAB a bit precious at “having to drink Prosecco within a year”.

caringcarer · 30/12/2023 18:43

If you Only told your Dad 2 weeks before Xmas he'd probably already bought it. Just drink it after you've given birth. I don't think it's thoughtless at all. Your Dad got you something he knows you like. You just have to wait a while to drink it. That surely shouldn't be a problem?

Crabble · 30/12/2023 18:45

It can be drunk after a year but it’s a bit of a weird choice to give to a pregnant woman.

Was it part of that hamper you mention or was the bottle itself the only gift?

Vinrouge4 · 30/12/2023 18:46

It doesn't show much imagination.

OneTC · 30/12/2023 18:47

I was teetotal for about 20 years and people used to give me alcohol every Christmas and birthday for the entire time. I was thankful for the plentiful supply of stuff to regift Grin

RedPandaFluff · 30/12/2023 18:50

Hold up . . . it's okay to drink alcohol when breastfeeding? I thought it was a no-no. Okay, maybe one small glass of something, but surely not "eating and drinking as normal"? For me, "normal" would be 2-3 glasses of white wine over dinner . . . but surely that's harmful when breastfeeding?

I'm breastfeeding right now so very invested in this conversation Grin

mangochops · 30/12/2023 18:50

It's just incredibly thoughtless. Also, I don't get the point of view that it will last a year so that's ok- who the fck wants a Christmas present now that they can't bloody enjoy until Christmas 2024?- insanely stupid.

balmysummerevening · 30/12/2023 18:55

OneTC · 30/12/2023 18:47

I was teetotal for about 20 years and people used to give me alcohol every Christmas and birthday for the entire time. I was thankful for the plentiful supply of stuff to regift Grin

I think I'd be tempted to give those people something equally useless back, something I knew they didnt enjoy. But I'm petty like that 😂

AllTheAll · 30/12/2023 18:55

RedPandaFluff · 30/12/2023 18:50

Hold up . . . it's okay to drink alcohol when breastfeeding? I thought it was a no-no. Okay, maybe one small glass of something, but surely not "eating and drinking as normal"? For me, "normal" would be 2-3 glasses of white wine over dinner . . . but surely that's harmful when breastfeeding?

I'm breastfeeding right now so very invested in this conversation Grin

I stopped BF about 10 years ago but it was perfectly safe in my circles to either have a guinness or other stout while you were actually feeding (or pumping). And then lots of water because you'll be thirsty. The baby gets "clean" milk because it was already in your breasts prior to drinking and then you get a few hours for it to leave your body before baby is hungry again. Not on the regular of course--once in a blue moon kind of thing to keep from going crazy.

Mammyloveswine · 30/12/2023 18:56

RedPandaFluff · 30/12/2023 18:50

Hold up . . . it's okay to drink alcohol when breastfeeding? I thought it was a no-no. Okay, maybe one small glass of something, but surely not "eating and drinking as normal"? For me, "normal" would be 2-3 glasses of white wine over dinner . . . but surely that's harmful when breastfeeding?

I'm breastfeeding right now so very invested in this conversation Grin

No way would I have breastfed for 18 months if I had to be teetotal Grin

Yes you can drink whilst breastfeeding.. you don't need to wait an amount of time after drinking to feed.. you don't need to express and chuck..

Original poster
whomoon · 30/12/2023 18:58

Thank you for your varied view points!

I’m glad others agree it’s a bit thoughtless, but also agree I’m being precious to be miffed by it. I’m not losing sleep over it don’t worry!

I announced the first week of December, but surely that would be time to simply remove the prosecco from the hamper? I wouldn’t expect a replacement gift, as there were other gifts to enjoy, the same from my DH aunt.

I’m surprised about the drinking and breast feeding. Especially getting through a bottle of Prosecco whilst doing so?

We’re all usually very good at gifts and always get useful/consumable items, so it just felt a bit of a cop out not to get something I have to wait to open. We don’t keep alcohol in the house unless we buy specifically to drink at the time, so it’s just something else to keep stored away now.

OP posts:
TooOldForThisNonsense · 30/12/2023 18:58

It’s a bit thoughtless. I don’t drink and was gifted a couple of bottles of Prosecco at Christmas, I obviously appreciated the gesture and just regifted them.

Jacfrost · 30/12/2023 19:00

You can drink and BF

Tonight1 · 30/12/2023 19:01

It is a bit thoughtless. Back in 2010 I visited a friend in hospital after a friend had given birth and I brought her a card and a bottle of champagne.

I still cringe when I think about it now! I was close to her partner as well so I should have given the champers to him and bought her something more practical.

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