DH has not done any food prep for Christmas today

[Dallidalli]

Just came home from work, walking all day through the gale winds. DH all day home with DC. Initially I was delighted as he tidied up and cleaned the bath room. I looked into the fridge and fuck all prep for dinner tomorrow was done.
Yesterday we discussed that I'll go and get last minute bits and bobs from the shops and he stays home with DC and starts Christmas prep. He did volunteer to do the bathroom but really it was his fucking turn.
I've not slept as DC is sleeping in our bed and has been twitching all night so my nerves are blank I know that and frankly I do think I'm slightly unreasonable and unfair but why the hell is it so difficult to go clean a bath AND get food prepped?? DC is toddler age so I get it's challenging. I'm just pissed off
I snapped at him yesterday too while wrapping presents. I asked him whats his plan for tomorrow (today) and he jokingly said "survive" and I blew the lid and told him I don't find it funny anymore (he says that joke a lot) and should start acting like an adult and that he did not contribute a thing to decorating, planning, gift organising....but most of his lazy attitude is making my anxiety worse as I can't trust he goes and just does the things that need done without me spelling it out for him.
I'm pissed off because all communication has broken down towards Christmas and I shout and he shuts down and that makes me even more angry because I find that cowardly behaviour.

Yes I am overtired, stressed, angry, overwhelmed, overstimulated and sad.

I just don't trust he got my back at all and he might also be struggling. Honestly I just want to cancel all plans for tomorrow with his family as it seems I'm the only actually giving a shit.

Sorry for rant.

You sound very tired and just done in. So deep breaths.

Firstly what food prep was you expecting done? I've made mince pies, santa cookies and a trifle. But I love to make these things. So it was enjoyable. My food prep will be peeling the tatties, carrots and parsnips and that is it.

You are possibly trying to do way to much and it has burned you out. Realistically look at everything in the new year and seriously ask yourself if you needed to do that.

Working Christmas eve is rubbish when you want to be getting on with stuff. Take it easy tomorrow. It really doesn't have to be a big thing. Everyone can help out. If they don't then it simply doesn't get done

Sounds like a very dysfunctional relationship with poor communication. Wishing you all the best for a nice day tomorrow though.

You are overworked and sleep deprived, so I totally sympathise. I was a monster when DC were little and I had no sleep.

But honestly, it doesn't matter that he prepped no food. It's fine that he's just surviving the day with your toddler. It's nice to have a clean bathroom. I'd give him a hug and say sorry you snapped, you know how time consuming toddler wrangling is, the bathroom looks great and you are looking forward to Christmas.

Does it really matter if you have those dishes or not? Isn't it more important that you relax together?

Sounds like hell to me that does. You must love cooking 😀

Do you work in a prison?

I'm guessing you've never experienced sleep deprivation while working full time right up to Christmas Day!

I have no input into cooking at all but DH hasn't done any prep for tomorrow. I don't know what this prep is either. I don't think he's ever prepped. Just done it on the day.

If this was about a husband who was feeling overwhelmed or sleep deprived and snapping and shouting and generally being abusive, no one would have any sympathy and be acusing the husband of all sorts.

As long as food is in the fridge all will be good.

Salad?????

I'm just sitting here crying. And I feel stupid and people are right it really doesn't matter if stuff is prepared. I was vile and abusive for bullshit reasons really.

The reason why I was so stressing for things to be done, his mum and sister are coming for 12pm but can't stay too long past 3ish as it's getting dark and his sister doesn't like driving in the dark. How mum is a peckish eater, one of the dishes DH wanted to make was also specifically for her as she wouldn't have touched any of the other foods (ED)
Crying did help a little. I just want to mend this with him and sleep.

6 of us at my brothers tomorrow. Nothing is prepped! We'll be sat down for 2pm !

Honestly, you need to step back.

I’ve prepped everything for tomorrow because I’d rather have everything ready just to cook and then I can spend the morning with my grandchildren instead of being in the kitchen

Chill seriously.

Wow 16 tomorrow will shove meat in at 8. No peeling....jacket them then they peel themselves toss in oil and roast. Yorkshire frozen.

I am most outraged by the mention of prepping salads. Salad has no place on a Christmas dinner.

Can I come to yours tomorrow, please?

Sorry you are so stressed OP, it sounds like it’s all just become overwhelming. Can you just have a chat with DP, apologise & move on?

Crying because dinner wasn’t prepped???

To put things into perspective, I am spending Christmas in ITU with my critically ill Dad, count your bloody blessings OP.

Merry Christmas to you.

How do you make gravey before cooking the meat? What type of gravy is it?

He knows his mum leave him to it.

You're both stressed and you blew a fuse.
Apologise - without expecting him to apologise too, just say sorry from your side.
Take it easy. He was supposed to do the dish - let him do it.
You're not feeding an army so don't have to go overboard with food.
So many people change into complete demons during Christmas. No, you don't have to prepare for the day like you're a 5 star hotel. Do the necessary minimum, nothing else. Relax. Be kind to each other. Jesus was born in a stable, not in a penthouse suite.

I think you need a sherry and a mince pie

He'll make his dishes if thats what he planned and if not, well its his family isnt it

Who the fuck has salad with Christmas Dinner???