To refuse to go in extra on boxing day because they kept my bonus?

[Housekeeperbatcocoa]

I'm not sure where to start with this one, sorry!

I work as a private housekeeper on a large farm/estate. The lady who owns the house is and always has been difficult and demanding, as is the rest of the family. She's been in and out of hospital this year with various injuries and I've been working my backside off to help - even going in on an evening to close the house up for her because she couldn't walk and none of her family would help her!

She's back in hospital atm and her daughters have also been putting on me in various ways - shopping runs for them, constant texts about stuff and just basically treating me like a skivvy from the Downton Abby days!

I accidentally saw a message saying she'd planned to give me £30 bonus for Christmas. When I left yesterday the oldest daughter gave me a card which I assumed had my bonus. Said thank you, came home. Just got around to opening it and the envelope had clearly been opened and there's no money in it.

That's fine - people can change their minds and if they have it is what it is. Though part of me can't help but think the oldest daughter has taken the money from the card 🙁 can't prove it, obviously, but that's what my gut says 😕

But they've just messaged me to say I need to go in on boxing day to "sort the dogs out". She wants me to go for 7am because no one else will be there.

I haven't answered yet but I feel like telling them to get stuffed and just not going back.

I've got a new job lined up for Feb and while it would be tight, I could manage without this one for the month!

What cheeky, entitled people!

I'd either not reply at all, or just tell them no. No excuses, just "No. I'm not working on boxing day."

I'd rather do without the pay than go back there, personally.

You know you are worth far more than that. Glad you have another job lined up.

Sorry too short notice.

Gently, your mistake was running round after such people in the first place.
I have a dear friend who did this (same job) and the demands didn't even stop when she broke her ankle

For now, "I already have plans so won't be able to help" - do NOT say sorry - and since you can afford it resign ASAP

I've gone above and beyond for your family this year without thanks or even acknowledgement, let alone a bonus.

I resign with immediate effect you stingy fuckfaces

Reply you have plans and this is too short notice. You could say you are travelling to see relatives.

Longer term, look for a new job and give your notice. These people don't deserve you.

£30? Jokers. Don't go.

“I’m unavailable on Boxing Day. Hope you get something else sorted for the dogs”.

If finances would be “tight” I’d give it another couple of weeks before walking away tbh.

Don't even respond, just ignore completely.

More detail needed OP.
What are your official working hours?
Do you get bank holidays off?
Had it been agreed that you would have the day off on Boxing Day?

This is awful. Tell them you can't do it. They are treating you like dirt.

Just say Sorry not available Boxing Day.

The person who planned to give you the cash bonus may not be aware that another family member nicked it but £30 is a very paultry bonus amount for that level of care and attention. Between a week's to a half a month's salary would be a decent Christmas Bonus for a valued employee.

But don't just bail on them totally. Do your contracted hours in January, work your notuce period but stop going the extra mile for them.

I assume it's not a live in job (I thought a lot of housekeeping jobs were?)

If not, that's great, easier to get away from them! Don't go in for Boxing day and tell them. After all you are visiting friends/family several hours drive away, aren't you? But tell them quickly so they can make arrangements for the dogs, well I am sure you will do that.

Regardless of the bonus fiasco - telling someone on Xmas eve they need to work on Boxing Day is shitty.

YANBU

Not sure I'd be taking orders from the daughters unless it was part of the job description when you started.

Unless the mother, your boss, is in a coma or suddenly unable to speak she herself can always phone or message you then you can take it as an opportunity to hand your notice in.

You enjoy your time off and let these miserable, selfish folk sort their own dogs out.

I thought you'd left this job, after the last thread or ten about it.

I work 9:30 - 4:30 four days a week. Occasionally later, if I have someone to look after my kids.

Normally work bank holidays but had already said I wouldn't be back until the 27th due to family commitments. It's a 20-30 min drive each way, more with the snow at the moment!

I wouldn't even reply

Did they give you a bonus last year and how much was it?

I am leaving! New job starts in Feb! I honestly can't wait. Wish I could have left sooner tbh!

Sorry that sounded really nosey!

"Soz - will still be blathered".

Yes, £30 again last year!

“Sorry my internet is iffy here in Spain and I’ve just seen your message. Can’t mind the dogs” 😎🍹

And they’re tightwads!! I’m glad you plan on moving on.

I’ve always done private childcare and always been given a weeks extra pay at Christmas, until this year! My current family haven’t given me anything yet (regular payment comes electronically on Monday, so there’s still time!). As someone who works in a home, there’s always lot of opportunity to “go above and beyond” and I always have, but that will end if I’m not appreciated!