To be seething at relative who’s passed on an illness this close to Christmas

[YaWeeFurryBastard]

Probably BVU but I’m awake in the middle of the night unable to sleep on day 2 of a bloody rotten cold. Relative came to stay for three days earlier in the week and neglected to mention they had a cold, I did hear some snuffling and throat clearing but put it down to age.

I have a crap immune system and pick up everything going and it always seems to be worse than for others as well. I am frankly really pissed off they didn’t mention it so I could have steered well clear of them as we are hosting Christmas for the first time with multiple relatives staying and I now feel bloody awful and would rather just be in bed.

I was so excited for this and have spent ages planning a nice day and now I just feel it will be ruined as going to feel like complete shit. Going elsewhere is not an option and all food has been bought. Guests are still happy to come despite my cold so I’ll just have to soldier on but I’m really not looking forward to it. Have dosed up on all the right meds but doesn’t seem to be making much difference.

I don’t think it’s that reasonable. I mean, it would have been better to let you know, but it’s a cold. We’ve all had colds and still have them, you could just as easily pick one up at work or in a shop and you’ve been able to stay in bed all day, which is pretty amazing. I think it’s a recent thing to be so bothered about a cold. I think anything like a stomach bug or pneumonia that’s truly going to affect the day would be awful and annoying, but colds are the type of virus you just get on with anyway. I do hope you feel a bit better for tomorrow though.

Honestly OP you're not helping yourself. Raging and posting on MN is not doing yourself any favours.

The blue light from your screen is not conducive to sleep. and you've been posting all night.

That is BU. Let it go and try and get some sleep which is what will help you. At this point you are making a mountain out of a molehill.

I hope you feel better soon.

Noooooo

I sent one of my team home the last 2 days in the office this week. He'd come in absolutely full of cold and with enough meds to restock boots.
"I've never had a sick day though boss".
Good for you, take your medal and piss off cause we don't want it!!

It's just common sense surely! Hope you feel better soon!!

I'm on day 8 of a head cold and I've had a hacking cough for a few weeks before that that's gone from dry to rattly in my throat. I'm gutted as it looks like my elderly uncle and and his partner won't be able to come to us on Boxing Day now. She's very frail and has had several strokes and understandably doesn't want to catch anything.

I hope everyone who's ill feels better soon 💐

@YaWeeFurryBastard

No didn't make me sick at all! If you think of it as more of an asian inspired cup a soup it helps though 😂

I sympathise OP.
A few years ago one of my toddler nephews had norovirus but was still brought to a large, extended family gathering just before Christmas as his parents thought he was better. He wasn't. Though since they didn't mention it none of us realised til we were all back in our own homes all over the country and all started puking simultaneously on Christmas morning.

Most people would have done, surely?

And it’s not “pre 2020”. Things have changed.

I think it’s a recent thing to be so bothered about a cold. I think anything like a stomach bug or pneumonia that’s truly going to affect the day would be awful and annoying, but colds are the type of virus you just get on with anyway

This is a ridiculous generalisation. Some colds and other respiratory viruses are highly debilitating and the sufferer can’t “just get on with it”.

People really need to let people know if they are sick before coming to stay or spending time with someone. Perhaps in their defence it came in after they arrived? My ds 19 has started coughing last night and announced he had a headache and felt hot (but wasn’t). I’ve got a friend coming for Christmas dinner so will have to let her know as she’s self employed and being sick will need no money (and she’s got some elderly clients). Sounds like covid but have no tests

I’ve always told people I’ve got a cold if we’d be seeing each other- that’s just basic politeness/common sense imo

Isn’t it possible they didn’t feel unwell until they arrived with you? I think you are being a bit harsh,

I also wish that people would remember that others can be effected differently. I have 2 auto immune conditions and asthma and I have a CEV disabled child. Colds can be a really major issue for us. And no guarantee, DH got a cold a few years back that DS got and was fine in 2 days and I got and was hospitalised. DS somehow sailed through covid as did I and DH with no conditions was absolutely floored by.

I ALWAYS tell people if I have a cold. Last week I called a friend (who thinks covid is hokum) to tell her DS had been exposed to covid via his best friend but was testing negative as she was due to visit her aunt in a care home after we had planned to visit her. It's only polite and sensible IMO to tell people and let them do the risk assessment for themselves.

Quick update - just spoke to my mum and apparently she has also come down with a horrible cold so I feel a lot less guilty about going down there. I'm going to dose up on day nurse and see if I've got the energy to do the drive today. If not then hopefully tomorrow morning. Probably won't be the best Christmas ever (!) but at least I'll be with family. Thanks everyone for the well wishes😊

I hope you feel better soon.
We've just got over terrible colds, it lasted about three and a half weeks.I felt so completely drained of energy but found it hard to sleep.

Very selfish behaviour but a lot of people just think
about their wants. Yes to Night Nurse! Surprised it hasn’t been banned. I have a friend who takes a swig when she cannot sleep. Definitely the liquid- the tablets aren’t the same thing at all.

If your DH can get to Boots I find this always helps me in conjunction with the usual meds

https://www.boots.com/boots-dual-defence-nasal-spray-20ml-10220406

YABU. It’s a cold. You need to improve your immune system.

Yes, the OP should take a magical immune boosting potion so she will never be ill again. OP, get onto Harry Potter straight away. 🙄

I sympathise, OP. I have a lousy immune system despite taking loads of vitamins etc. and colds hit me really hard. I feel so angry if I am forced into contact with someone who is clearly ill.

How? Sorry not trying to be sarky but I eat healthily, exercise and take vitamins, not sure what else I can do.

My in laws did the same but if I pull them on it, they will deny it until they're blue in the face and claim it's going around - but they were the only sick people we have been near.

Makes me so mad. So irresponsible and they don't actually care if they make a baby sick, only care about having "family together" when really, if you are or have been sick, you should always tell people so they can make their own decisions to attend. They're just scared that we won't want to catch something (shock!). But it makes me not want to attend anything with them ever as I can't trust them.

People don't generally pass on illnesses deliberately. I've got a cold which I probably caught on a busy bus or from a snotty grandchild. It happens, it always has and always will. I see no reason to be seething at anyone.

I’ve got asthma, colds can become chest infections needing antibiotics and steroid tablets . Sometimes symptoms last for weeks .

Open a bottle of gin - or whisky if you like it. You'll float, so will the turkey. Get others to help. Which they should anyway if you are cooking for a large number.

Except in this specific instance you are commenting against where the likely source was indeed a deliberate act, hence the seething, but super helpful nonetheless