To be seething at relative who’s passed on an illness this close to Christmas

[YaWeeFurryBastard]

Probably BVU but I’m awake in the middle of the night unable to sleep on day 2 of a bloody rotten cold. Relative came to stay for three days earlier in the week and neglected to mention they had a cold, I did hear some snuffling and throat clearing but put it down to age.

I have a crap immune system and pick up everything going and it always seems to be worse than for others as well. I am frankly really pissed off they didn’t mention it so I could have steered well clear of them as we are hosting Christmas for the first time with multiple relatives staying and I now feel bloody awful and would rather just be in bed.

I was so excited for this and have spent ages planning a nice day and now I just feel it will be ruined as going to feel like complete shit. Going elsewhere is not an option and all food has been bought. Guests are still happy to come despite my cold so I’ll just have to soldier on but I’m really not looking forward to it. Have dosed up on all the right meds but doesn’t seem to be making much difference.

Really?

People are ill

Go away

Looks like a spammer. Have reported.

@seenisambol

Spk to your family and see what they say

Dose up and see if you're fit to drive, if they say come anyway

Drink lots of water. Lots

How bloody inconsiderate. I'd be fuming too.

In future though, keep some first defence in the house ready. I've used it a few times this year to stop a cold taking hold and so far it's worked a treat.

You have to get other people to pitch in so you can rest. Don't just soldier on as normal.

YaNBU! I’m the same atm and can’t smell or taste a single thing so cooking is out of the question. And eating all the nice (and expensive in total) food we bought… I know there’s someone always worse off though so reminding myself of that. But yes, still very annoying.

Mildly embarrassing for you to only just find out it has been common behaviour by grown adults for, quite literally the last hundred years and probably more

Similarly this faux misty eyed reminiscence - wasn't it better pre 2020 when we all just wandered around care free spreading illnesses around like medieval times, what a time to be alive! All this hand washing and basic consideration for the health of others so tiresome and bothersome. In my day I used to get e coli weekly just to prove I wasn't a snowflake and go into the office even though my ears had fallen off, barely a flesh wound

😂👏

Definitely speak with them! For all my moaning I would definitely not let a family member with a cold be alone at Christmas, they’d still be welcome I’d just be taking extra precautions so I didn’t catch it and not hugging them/sitting next to them for hours like I was this week.

Really sorry for all those also feeling ill, such shitty timing! I hope you all feel better soon 💐

Thank you, did that not make you sick though as no offence but it sounds absolutely vile!!

This made me laugh! Surely someone with asthma and a tiny baby would avoid germy places?
YABU.
Anyway OP, since you have a cold you will have to warn your guests to stay away.

I also don't remember anyone informing others of having a cold before meeting up. It used to be expected that you'd catch a few colds every year, and everyone knew that you couldn't live a normal and fulfilling life while trying to avoid them.

😂😂

I must admit, I’m a bit baffled by all this.

My mum has been shopping and prepping for weeks, like most people. I have gifts for siblings kids and becase we do a secret Santa type thing they won’t get any if I didn’t go.

There is no way I would turn round at the last minute and say “actually the kids and I aren’t coming because I have a cold”. It just wouldn’t happen. We’d need to be seriously ill with d&v or something. It’s just a cold. They are ten a penny at this time of year.

I thought this was true of most people 😬

And yeah this has definitely become more of a “thing” since 2020. Colds barely registered before then. The idea of calling in sick to work with a cold was ridiculous

I’ve literally just had Covid ( was ill in bed for a few days ) . As have two other families members ( different households) . Another ( different household ) is currently pretty unwell in bed with Covid . Covid is still very much out there too. Loads have been off work with a bad cold/flu /Covid over the past few weeks .

personally i agree with OP- I think it is very rude to pass on illness especially when 1/10 people who get Covid will get long Covid . I’m pretty pissed off that a visitor to my house made me ill in my own home ( knew they were going down with something but said nothing ) - I’ve still got some lingering issues from my last infection & will be really fed up if I have more long term issues . ( no I’m not clinically vulnerable before anyone asks -the 1:10 applies to any of us)

hope you feel better soon OP.

I’m not saying people should just cancel, but surely you’d let the hosts know? Then they can choose to keep a distance if they want to instead of obliviously exposing themselves. That’s what I’m annoyed about as I wouldn’t have sat right next to relative for hours if I’d known and perhaps I wouldn’t have caught it.

I had similar when heavily pregnant- a relative turned up with a cold. I caught it and was violently ill, with what was probably pneumonia. It took me months to recover and i was still spewing up fluids after had been born.

Well it depends I think. If I was full on unwell then yes I would definitely mention it but if I just had a bit of a mild sniffle then it probably wouldn’t really occur to me tbh.

Course these days,you cannot be sure it is ", just a cold". I hadn't had a cough cold for over 20 years, family cannot remember the last time,not the WVV and I was nursing. Came in contact with both DKs and DGKs who subsequently tested positive for Covid. I see on another post people don't bother testing anymore. My youngest DD, DPs,DM was coming to stay,she's had 4 major operations,last one very recently,his aunt is CV, they felt unwell, symptoms,so tested. I had COVID, first time ever in September,fully vaxed, not CV, was bedridden, several days,long story short, now under 4 different consultants (2 directly Covid related,) and diagnosed with long Covid.

*lI must admit, I’m a bit baffled by all this.

My mum has been shopping and prepping for weeks, like most people. I have gifts for siblings kids and becase we do a secret Santa type thing they won’t get any if I didn’t go.

There is no way I would turn round at the last minute and say “actually the kids and I aren’t coming because I have a cold”. It just wouldn’t happen. We’d need to be seriously ill with d&v or something. It’s just a cold. They are ten a penny at this time of year.

I thought this was true of most people 😬*

Totally agree.

You never really know where you get a cold from anyway.

Really sorry to hear this ☹️. I think it’s definitely worth remembering that what might be mild for one person can be hideous for the next. Rather like how some people with covid were symptomless and others on life support. I’d just like it if people would err on the side of caution and at least tell others they’re feeling unwell.

Well it depends I think. If I was full on unwell then yes I would definitely mention it but if I just had a bit of a mild sniffle then it probably wouldn’t really occur to me tbh.

This

I'd be annoyed too, OP. I'm asthmatic and also take immunosuppressants. Pretty much every cold/bug I get leads to a chest infection, antibiotics, worsening asthma and steroid tablets, followed by a lingering cough which typically lasts 4-8 weeks.

DH and I have a lot of vulnerable relatives, including elderly grandparents (the oldest is 97 and frail), a parent on chemo who is very immunocompromised and 3 other parents with chronic illnesses which make them vulnerable. We never ever see them if we're unwell.

Last christmas I came down with the flu on Christmas Day and it was bloody miserable. I spent most of the day shivering under a blanket. We were meant to see my parents a few days later but cancelled.

I hope you feel better soon. If you get lots of rest and fluids today hopefully you will have some more energy tomorrow.