To be seething at relative who’s passed on an illness this close to Christmas

[YaWeeFurryBastard]

Probably BVU but I’m awake in the middle of the night unable to sleep on day 2 of a bloody rotten cold. Relative came to stay for three days earlier in the week and neglected to mention they had a cold, I did hear some snuffling and throat clearing but put it down to age.

I have a crap immune system and pick up everything going and it always seems to be worse than for others as well. I am frankly really pissed off they didn’t mention it so I could have steered well clear of them as we are hosting Christmas for the first time with multiple relatives staying and I now feel bloody awful and would rather just be in bed.

I was so excited for this and have spent ages planning a nice day and now I just feel it will be ruined as going to feel like complete shit. Going elsewhere is not an option and all food has been bought. Guests are still happy to come despite my cold so I’ll just have to soldier on but I’m really not looking forward to it. Have dosed up on all the right meds but doesn’t seem to be making much difference.

I've just woken up feeling absolutely horrendous. Currently shivering under a duvet with a massive headache full of snot. I'm supposed to be driving down to family for Christmas today. It's game over isn't it?

I've had such a horrendous year so I feel like I could cry. Anyone have any suggestions? Part of me is wondering if I should try and get down there and self-isolate in a room in their house. Having a bit of Christmas dinner and some Lemsip posted through the door sounds better than being here alone eating beans on toast.

@seenisambol
omg. Seriously do not go.

I'm not one of these people who are paranoid about catching anything..I still go into work with a cold and do normal life BUT its only polite to mention you've got a cold before meeting up socially with someone. Things like that can be cancelled and its only fair and right to leave it up to the person who's not got the cold to decide for themselves. It's SO RUDE when people show at your house/a meal/whatever clearly really unwell coughing everywhere 😒 you're obviously 1 of those people though so you wouldn't understand what it means to be thoughtful.

I get what posters are saying about not inflicting illness on others. Of course it's polite to let them know & offer the option of staying away.

But in your case, with a cold, if you were my family member, there would be no question you'd come! You'd keep your distance a bit but certainly not self-isolate.

Of course this changes if there are any vulnerable people in the house.

I'm a bit taken aback at the level of isolation that's expected. Gastro is different as it's so debilitating but for respiratory conditions, with family at Christmas, I think it's fine to discuss ways of being cautious. Hope you feel better soon

Sorry to hear this OP

If you have asthma, ‘respiratory conditions’ such as a cold can really set it off.

It's not cool of them to turn up unwell but to be honest you do sound a bit dramatic. I've had dry socket from wisdom teeth removal and haven't been able to rest at all as I've got a baby and toddler.

I'm dosed up on codeine and up several times in the night (for the last 2 weeks) but I want it to be special for DD so I just grit my teeth and collapse when they finally go to bed.

Personally I wouldn't go for the journey alone. It's rubbish travelling when you're feeling ill.

I'm on day 6 of conjunctivitis and some sort of virus that has left me with a fever and chills. Ds has it the week before.We were due to host Xmas at ours but had to cancel as dd1 has started to come down with the same thing (nor as big an issue as some of you as we are Muslim anyway so it's more of just a fun meal). Our gutst are include an asthmatic, elderly people and young kids. I am gutted though as I took time off this month (work in healthcare) in the hope I vould avoid this as I am meant to be visiting my dad after Xmas and it would be the first time I've seen him since he got the all clear after having cancer.

I feel for you op especially as it was avoidable. In the mean time plenty of fluids, rest up as much as you can, if you can manage a short walk then go for it, if not open the windows and air the house. Get as much rest before people arrive and keep yourself dosed up.

Sudafed max strength tablets and an orange drink vitamin C with zinc tablet (dissolved in a glass of water, they come in tubes and I got mine in Sainsburys). My go to everytime for the current colds.

hope you manage a lovely Christmas OP 💐💐💐

It’s just a cold YABU. Get the dressing gown of doom off, pull up your socks and get on with it ffs.

Personally I wouldn't go for the journey alone. It's rubbish travelling when you're feeling ill.

They will try and convince me to come but it's probably a bad idea isn't it. Just having a little cry looking at my suitcase packed with the presents sat on top of it. Bleurgh good riddance 2023 :(

Because it could be COVID which can be far more damaging and leave long term complications.

@seenisambol what sort of family are you talking about? If it's your parents can you talk to them? Because if you were my daughter, I would be in the car already setting out to get you.....

I'm not trying to make you feel worse if that's not possible. But do talk to them.

Tell them you can only make the journey if one of them comes and collects you and then brings you back after. Bet they'll change their tune then!

I've been ill since Weds with a coughing virus and cancelled everything but Xmas Day itself. I've given relatives the option of staying away but they're coming and I'm hoping by tomorrow I won't be feeling as wiped out. If I was in your shoes, knowing how ill I felt at the beginning, there's no way I'd be moving from my bed! Hope you feel better soon.

Take an antihistamine plus some paracetamol. That should help clear it up, along with steaming your head

It's not just a cold if she's been coughing all night, FFS. There's a nasty bronchial virus doing the rounds and lots of people are coming down with pneumonia.

Make some fire water. Ginger, garlic, cayenne pepper, honey and lemon in warm water. I made a big flask of it last time I had a bad cold and genuinely felt better later that day. I think the cayenne helps you sweat some of the illness out.

Thanks everyone, I'll chat to them and see what they say. Currently dosing up on meds which is helping but I'd feel awful if I made everyone ill at Christmas. And apologies for hijacking the thread OP - hope you feel better soon.

Oh my gosh you poor thing :( Have you tried night nurse? It’s te only thing that works when I have a cold. Knocks me out and stops me coughing. You’d feel groggy for Christmas Day but you’ll feel crap anyway. Hope you can rest a bit today, bed by 9/9./0 and knock out with night nurse and Vicks nose unblocker up the nose 🤞🤞🤞🤞

Let them get on with it and you just join in, a little or as often, as you want to.

I cough for quite some time AFTER I've had a cold or like bug. Coughs in particular can take forever to shake. Well past the contagious stage.

The 'cold' which has passed round my office is a beast. I have now been unwell for four weeks with a congested chest and cough as well headache and tiredness. Trouble is we can't stay away from work and life that long. It is rude to visit someone's home whilst I'll though.