To think 8pm is too late to eat our turkey on Christmas Day

[Pinkevie]

My in-laws are hosting xmas day this year and two days ago my husband announced that they are not expecting us to turn up until 6pm and will be serving the turkey at 8pm. (We live nearby so will be walking over). For me this feels ludicrously late in the day to enjoy the festive roast, especially as our 11 and 14 year old will be up at the crack of dawn and so we'll have been up for hours at this point. I think I'm going to be nodding off in the gravy. My mum is also joining us and suffers with terrible heartburn, she thinks she's going to have to forego a decent portion or face being up in agony all night. I could accept eating the meal at 6pm but 8pm feels so late. My husband says as his parents are providing the meal this year we have to go with a timetable that suits them and it will stress out his 80 year old mum if he mentions I want it to a bit earlier. A late meal has always been her preference. I get on well with her and don't want to upset her but think she would see reason if he broached the issue tactfully but he is refusing to do so and has forbidden me from asking her. I feel to bring it forward by a couple of hours would be a reasonable compromise. They'd still have plenty of time to prepare the meal at a leisurely pace but we wouldn't be hanging around all day before we can properly enjoy the festivities. I also think it's nice to enjoy a family game of charades or similar after christmas dinner but don't think we'll have time if we're starting so late. Curious to see what others think.

Have your ILs never hosted before, or is this unusual for them? Anyway, it sounds like your husband has scuppered any chance of a compromise this year, so grit your teeth and bear it

I would consider 8pm late for dinner most days. I tend to eat around 6/6.30pm, and Christmas Dinner around 2-3pm start.

I agree, it's ridiculously late for a "Christmas together" meal. 8pm is when you visit family you HAVEN'T spent Christmas Day with.

You have (just) enough time to get to the shops and buy what you need to make your own Christmas lunch.

Just because THEY have decided to have the meal at dinner time, doesn't mean you have to miss out on lunch.

Doesn't matter if you have 2 x turkey and ham meals (most people just do leftovers for dinner anyway, so eat the same twice).

Or you could take the opportunity to having something a little different for lunch.

Maybe even invite your DM!

If you and your DC eat less at their meal as a result, well, too bad.

Yes it's late.

No, I can't imagine it.

I'd be cooking immediately after breakfast, and I can't imagine being hungry enough for a full meal in the middle of the day.

I'm not my grandparents, who were up before dawn to milk cows and bring them out to the pasture, with lots of other farm work to follow, so up for about eight hours by 1pm. It makes no sense for me to roll out of bed at 8 on Christmas morning and sit down to a full dinner at midday after a morning that features three or four mor hours in bed than they ever had, and does not include any heavy work at all.

We have a hearty brunch around 10am, with nibbles and leftovers from the previous night's festive dinner for anyone who feels hungry between the end of brunch and dinner time, which is usually around 7. We sit around together once the brunch things have been cleared away, and then I get the evening meal started.

I've never eaten any dinner before 6, even when I had small children, and we always ate together as a family.

Which is what the poor OP's nun suffers.

My sister and family always ate a full dinner at 8 or 9 pm and my mum would say it was too late when she stayed with them. I didn't understand why until I got to her age and now I do! Your digestive system, like so much else, just isn't as effective as you get older and the person in question knows she gets heartburn if she eats late, let alone a full Christmas dinner.

Still, too late. Perhaps just stick up on Gaviscon!

My preference would be to eat much earlier, but it's totally up to the hosts how they do it!

The best lunch if the year stuffed down in an hour? No thanks.

It’s not supper. It’s Christmas Dinner. It’s traditionally a feast.

There’s a big chunk of time between noon and 8pm. Dinner at 2 after a light breakfast is imaginable surely?

Get up early, crack open the bubbly, have afternoon nap, ready for round two, as for your mum, it's a bit shit.

I couldn’t eat Christmas dinner at 8pm. It’s the heaviest, biggest meal you can imagine and by that point I couldn’t stomach it. I’d suggest doing the day differently, going to their house in the morning for presents and pastries, then go back to your own house for lunch.

Nothing wrong with still being at the table in the early hours though. I think people are assuming that just because you start late you need to rush and can’t get all the courses in.

Admittedly the year we miscalculated the start time for the turkey and started at 10pm was too late.

It would mean it for me though @RafaistheKingofClay - I’ve never beeen great at staying up all night. If you didn’t finish until, say 1, it would be 3 or 4 before I’d fancy bed. Plus you miss all the slightly silly game playing after. Wouldn’t be the same before.
And any family with children wouldn’t be able to.

What?

I really sympathise, OP, and I disagree with your husband (although I think it might have been better to say something earlier) The thought of eating that heavily at 8pm makes me feel quite queasy, and I wouldn't want a big lunch either and then to eat a substantial meal at night. I actually don't understand how people eat so much on Christmas day anyway: I have a hearty appetite, but I can't manage a big breakfast and then a rich meal followed by pudding. I would literally be sick.

Cook your own turkey and enjoy eating it at your own house in your own time. Don’t go!

8pm is a perfectly normal time to eat dinner if you booked a restaurant or went to a friends for dinner.

We always do Christmas Dinner as an evening meal. Works well for us.

Those of you saying 8 is ridiculous, do you ever get a big takeaway in the evening? How is Christmas Dinner any different?

We usually do a late lunch but can see why it's easier to do in the evening, especially if you're not a morning person.

But why?
We don't have a light breakfast. We enjoy a hearty brunch.

When the DCs were small, I would have a slice of toast and a cuppa while they opened their presents. Then I would cook the late breakfast/ brunch.

Then after that was cleared away and the dishwasher started, we would set up/ play / enjoy the presents, maybe watch a Christmas DVD, and I would set out food for nibbling and get stuck into the dinner prep.

Nobody in my family ever starves or feels deprived of food in any way on Christmas Day. We don't stuff our faces either. I see no need for that sort of excess.

I'd go shopping tomorrow have dinner at my own house and just pop over for drinks and maybe a sandwich.

We eat at 7.30 most nights. 8 isn’t that much of a stretch at your children’s’ ages. It’s a special occasion. Lighten up and enjoy the lay in on Boxing Day.

These replies! Xmas Dinner should surely be between 2 and 5pm starting then take at least an hour, probably more, then dessert. And cheese and meats either at lunch or later maybe 8! If you ate earlier.
How can you eat at least 3 meals worth of food at 8pm, especially after all the alcohol calories 🤣

Ah, a roast dinner with pudding, a starter and large amounts of booze. Don’t worry, I’m sure it’ll still be possible for OP to start the boozing earlier in the day.

Nut how did your children cope after midnight at the table?
Plus, it’s literally a traditional feast. Excess is the point…
Im nit saying you shouldn’t do it. I’m saying I wouldn’t, and explaining why.