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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU - neighbour fallout

227 replies

mrsclaus1984 · 20/12/2023 00:52

I really don’t think I’ve done anything wrong here, but it’s weighing on my mind a lot so here I am…!

Recently, a small business in our village held a charity raffle to win a fairly high-end beauty product (worth approx £300). I didn’t actually know about this raffle until my next door neighbour mentioned it to me - (I personally have never used this business before so did not see that they had been advertising the raffle on their social media as I don’t follow them.)

The prize was something that I would love to have anyway, and so I entered the raffle.

I was very surprised to receive a phone call a couple of days ago to be told that I had won it! I went in to collect it. They asked if I would mind having my photo taken with the prize, and for the photo to be posted on their social media, which I was fine about. I was really pleased, I never win anything and it truly made my day!

They were completely lovely to me when I went into collect it, that I may well start using this business regularly now.

Anyway - this is where it all went a bit wrong ..
the following day, I bumped into my neighbour whilst having just left the house to walk the dog. Before I could say anything to her, she said to me, ‘I see you are the winner of the raffle then’ in quite a cool tone.. I replied, and told her that yes, I was really pleased and very thankful ..

The conversation was very quick as it was raining and I didn’t want to hang around, and to be honest, I didn’t give it much more thought after this.

But… I was absolutely gobsmacked to get a knock on the door this evening, from my neighbour. As it happens, I was going to deliver her Christmas card tonight anyway, and so I had it on the table by our front door so when she opened the door I said hi and said something along the lines of ‘oh while you’re here, let me give you this’.. and proceeded to try to give her the card, but she replied with, “ yeah, you can keep it… You realise that, if it hadn’t been for me, you would never have even known about the raffle, right?”…. I was a bit taken back by this, and I told her that I was grateful she had let me know about it. To which she said to me that I should be giving HER the prize because she had told me about it in the first place….! I laughed because I actually thought she was joking… but no, she was being completely serious..!

She said that because she is a single mum, it would have been very useful to her because she would’ve just sold it, and made herself a couple of hundred pounds towards Christmas. She then proceeded to tell me that I’m being completely selfish by not giving her the prize. Before I could say anything, she turned around and walked off..

Literally can somebody help me out here .. I haven’t done anything wrong, have I?!

I do have a tendency to overthink things, but I actually don’t think I am BU here??

Idly wondering if I should gift her the item for Christmas, as honestly cannot stand the thought of having any issues with neighbours..

OP posts:
strawberry2017 · 20/12/2023 10:01

She's nuts!
Don't think anything of it. You won fair and square and if she can afford beauty treatment then she's clearly not struggling that much.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 20/12/2023 11:11

She's crazy as they come.

And those of you that would have offered her the prize, or part of the prize, need to seriously grow a backbone. She isn't entitled to any of it. Don't be so wet as to give stuff up to keep the peace. She's not going to do anything apart from whinge.

BMW6 · 20/12/2023 11:36

Oh OP your neighbour is an utter nutter!

Maddest thing I've ever heard!

Vitriolinsanity · 20/12/2023 11:46

She clear does not understand how a raffle works.

It's not like a person gives them a tenner for a strip of tickets and pretty much gets a prize like a Chocolate Tombola.

SparkyBlue · 20/12/2023 13:19

She sounds deranged but she has done you a favour as now you know what she is like so be polite but steer well clear of her from now on

SparklyMularky · 20/12/2023 14:51

She must be doing well for herself, 10 year olds don't usually manage to run a household on their own.

Genuinely baffled at her incredibly childish behaviour. She's really embarrassed herself here and absolutely shown you who she really is. Thankfully over something small, god knows how much she would kick off over something big.

It wouldn't surprise me if she comes crawling back once she has realised. Hopefully she is a mumsnetter...

Jioyt · 20/12/2023 14:59

Just when you think you've heard all there is to hear about cre- cre neighbours, along comes THIS neighbour.

The only rational explanation is that she really IS having a moment of absolute madness.

Please keep the prize and ignore.

SuspiciousSue · 20/12/2023 15:01

😂 What a moron! She clearly doesn’t realise that there’s no guarantee she’d have won anyway. No need to give it to her.

Crazycrazylady · 20/12/2023 18:14

Totally nuts..
Batshit really

Hopefully she will tell someone else and they will set her straight .

newnamethanks · 21/12/2023 08:25

Some people are simply bitter, entitled and batty. Manager at work looking pissed off. 'Are you OK X?' "No. My bloody sister's bought my house" ? What? 'What do you mean? How can she have bought your house? It's yours'. Transpired that sister still lived in the backwoods where they'd grown up 40+ years before and had bought a house there. A house that Manager had once, when they were children, said she'd like to live in. There was absolutely no prospect of Manager ever actually going to live there "live there? There's no shops!" or being able to do so. Nevertheless her sister was a "selfish fucking bitch, she knew I liked that house". You cannot reason with such people. Keep your distance.

PotatoLove · 21/12/2023 17:42

So why did she even tell you about the raffle if she didn't want you to buy a ticket? She sounds like a right silly cow!

Billybea · 21/12/2023 17:56

@mrsclaus1984 well if I were you, I would knock on her door and say, you're absolutely right, I would never have known about the raffle had it not been for you, and you've made me feel so guilty about winning, so here you go, here's your raffle ticket money back! Hahaha

CaroleSinger · 21/12/2023 17:57

She sounds like a bit of a dick but sadly will probably hold this against you forever and be really hostile now. She's being ridiculous, she doesn't own the raffle and dictate who can enter. Just be prepared that she's probably going to be an arsehole now.

Zerosleep · 21/12/2023 17:57

Are you kidding? She is being a total CF and no way should you give her anything. There are only two words for someone like that, the first begins with ‘F’ and the second is ‘off’.

BlueFlowers5 · 21/12/2023 18:04

She hopes to intimidate you into giving her the prize.

Don't do it and if she gets heavier, think about reporting her.

Dickwadddddd · 21/12/2023 18:04

Your neighbour is wack

Greenshed · 21/12/2023 18:06

And if it had been someone else who won it, would she have sought them out to tell them it’s not fair and that she should have it? She’s being totally ridiculous.
Enjoy your prize, don’t let her get to you. She may, or may not, come round eventually and realise how stupid she has been, but that’s up to her. Don’t give her attitude another thought.

Evan456 · 21/12/2023 18:18

If someone says there’s the euro lottery Friday night as it’s the most they’ve ever given, and you win, are you then supposed to give your winnings to that person who told you? I don’t think so

Evan456 · 21/12/2023 18:20

Actually I’d post it on the notice board and ask what the rest of the town/village think of her remarks, not naming her of course, may change her attitude though

LakeTiticaca · 21/12/2023 18:22

Just when you think you've heard it all, something even more batshit comes along. What a CF!! 🤣

godmum56 · 21/12/2023 18:28

yabu, she is being batshit.

pictoosh · 21/12/2023 18:33

eeeee this has made me laugh! Outrageous.
Is this real...omvg if it is. What a grasping, aggressive twat. No self-respect. Sad really.
It's a good story to tell at gatherings though. Ha ha.

scoobydoo1971 · 21/12/2023 18:41

Your neighbour is a bully. Ignore her and enjoy your prize. She has highlighted what a vindictive and nasty individual she is, and at least you know who lives next door now. I would just ignore her in the future as she has bigger issues than you winning a prize!

Couldyounot · 21/12/2023 18:48

She sounds like an absolute fucking belter. Ignore

Butchyrestingface · 21/12/2023 18:51

Well, she's a lunatic. But lunatics DO have to live somewhere, OP.

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