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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Trans women do not have periods.

684 replies

zaazaazoo · 19/12/2023 18:12

According to period pants maker Modibodi, transwomen can have 'periods'. Periods which are just as valid apparently.

Whilst I'm not going to suggest I know what hormone treatment tied to a trans woman, I can confidently say that no, they don't have periods. Periods involve blood. Trans women don't bleed.

Modibodi seem to acknowledge that there is no bleeding involved I transwomen's 'periods' but bizarrely under a section on how to manage their periods, trans women should wear period pants. For the life of all God's WHY???! Wtf would wear period pants if they didn't have to?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
55
TheKeatingFive · 20/12/2023 08:36

But I believe in being kind to trans women in general

Personally I don't believe in 'being kind' to delusional or fetishising men in a way that undermines the dignity and experience of women and girls.

But I guess we all have our value systems 🤷‍♀️

sendinthefrownz · 20/12/2023 08:38

WhichIsItWendy · 19/12/2023 20:51

Honestly, the language you're using makes it sound like you've been knee deep in gender critical text books and are just regurgitating it.

Your extremism isn't helping anyone. Calm down and put the podcasts down.

@WhichIsItWendy
You could do with reading a few gender critical books yourself. Your post is so patronising and exaggerated.

HoneyButterPopcorn · 20/12/2023 08:40

‘Be kind’. Hmmmm. I try to ‘be nice’ to people in general - why would I attempt to be horrible? I don’t blanket ‘kindly’ a load of people because they are ‘special’.

TheKeatingFive · 20/12/2023 08:42

Also, since when did 'be kind' become 'lie to people to affirm their delusion'. We aren't 'kind' to anyone else in that way.

Everyone needs to ask themselves whose interests are they serving here? And why?

Laurendelaney1987 · 20/12/2023 08:45

TheAlchemistElixa · 19/12/2023 20:37

Oh my god. Ok. I stand corrected and take it all back! That is batshit

Well done admitting when you were wrong!!! I too first thought it was referring to trans men who were born women.

i have no problem with trans women. But they do not have periods

Baldieheid · 20/12/2023 08:50

TheKeatingFive · 20/12/2023 08:42

Also, since when did 'be kind' become 'lie to people to affirm their delusion'. We aren't 'kind' to anyone else in that way.

Everyone needs to ask themselves whose interests are they serving here? And why?

And who is having "be kind" demanded of them.

Is it the men who are being asked to "be kind" to those of their own sex who express themselves differently through clothing, hair, make up or other sexist gender expressions?

Is it men who are being asked to "be kind" to the members of the opposite sex who gatecrash their single sex medical facilities and services?

Ooooh look, no it's not.

So who IS having "be kind" demanded of them?

Hmmmm.

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 08:54

TheKeatingFive · 20/12/2023 08:42

Also, since when did 'be kind' become 'lie to people to affirm their delusion'. We aren't 'kind' to anyone else in that way.

Everyone needs to ask themselves whose interests are they serving here? And why?

I don't actually think it is that kind to lie to people with dysphoria and pretend we see them the way they see themselves. The more people are willing to go along with the pretence, the more crushing it must be when they encounter someone who isn't prepared to do it.

I have thought for a long time that pharmaceutical companies should be trying to develop a drug to alleviate the symptoms of dysphoria, similar to an antidepressant. Surely it would be much better to help trans people overcome their dysphoria and live more comfortably in the body they are actually in.

But I doubt this will happen because pharmaceutical companies have more to gain from pumping people full of synthetic hormones for the rest of their lives, and society in general isn't brave enough to say that it would actually be beneficial to try and find a cure for dyphoria, because that would imply that there is something wrong with being trans.

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 08:56

Baldieheid · 20/12/2023 08:50

And who is having "be kind" demanded of them.

Is it the men who are being asked to "be kind" to those of their own sex who express themselves differently through clothing, hair, make up or other sexist gender expressions?

Is it men who are being asked to "be kind" to the members of the opposite sex who gatecrash their single sex medical facilities and services?

Ooooh look, no it's not.

So who IS having "be kind" demanded of them?

Hmmmm.

Oh, I know!

People who might have a legitimate use for period pants at some point in their lives. They are the ones who need to be kind.

NanaTucker57 · 20/12/2023 08:58

Men don't menastrate, only women do....not trans, only females...PERIOD!!!!

Baldieheid · 20/12/2023 08:59

"Be kind" is the new way of telling women and girls to shut the fuck up.

Makes me all punchy.

CatMadam · 20/12/2023 08:59

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 07:43

Do you believe in being kind to all women?

Or just the ones who were born with penises?

In general, I believe in being kind to everyone!

Desecratedcoconut · 20/12/2023 09:01

It's always kind...kind being increasingly other to both truthful and fair.

Ramalangadingdong · 20/12/2023 09:02

I've just had a look at the website. Firstly, it is a blog that the company has provided a link to for all who are interested. I don't know why women would click on a link to read a blog about trans women in the first place when it doesn't concern them. The blog makes it clear that the hormones given to trans women result in the monthly experience of symptoms which indicate it is "their time of the month" - even though they are not ovulating the hormones they take may make them experience mood swings etc and there is then a link provided with information for their loved ones to support them. We haven't yet found a language to describe this "time of month" for trans women, but I suppose that we will in the future and it won't be called a period.

I don't see why OP is fussed about this. They state in the blog that trans women do not have a uterus.

This post is making a fuss about nothing. I don't like the idea of men appropriating women's experience of womanhood, but I don't think that is what is happening here. In fact, after reading the blog I get a clear message that a trans woman is not a woman, but a trans woman, which is its own thing. I think there should be more stuff like this for trans people and that trans people should find a language with which to describe their unique experience.

NanaTucker57 · 20/12/2023 09:07

Then they aren't a man, only women can have periods, putting the word trans in front of them doesn't make them different or changing them their last part i.e. men doesn't make them one....if they have a uterest they are a women ....if not they are a man. ...PERIOD....SCIENCE IS SCIENCE .....

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 09:08

CatMadam · 20/12/2023 08:59

In general, I believe in being kind to everyone!

OK, great.

Do you understand that an awful lot of what happens in the name of "trans rights" is extremely unkind to women?

For example, I don't know if you saw it linked upthread but this is an article about a woman who uses the pseudonym Sarah Summers, who has been fighting for several years now for women in Brighton to have access to single sex rape crisis support.

She was having counselling in a female only group when a male person joined. When she asked whether it was possible for there to be just one group which was guaranteed to be female only, she was told no, because trans women are women and are welcome in all women's spaces.

That's right, a rape crisis organisation decided that the potential harm caused to trans people by the very existence of a single sex group for female rape survivors was greater and more important than the potential harm caused to those female rape survivors by not having access to any single sex services. They have continuously doubled down on their position and she is now taking them to court.

The Survivors' Network is far from the only rape crisis organisation which has taken this approach; in fact in many parts of the country there is simply no single sex support for female survivors anymore. This was what led to JK Rowling setting up Beira's Place, a refuge in Edinburgh for female survivors. And guess what? Even though Beira's Place is completely privately funded by JK Rowling and does not take anything away from any of the other services that are currently available, all of which are inclusive of trans women, trans activists are attempting to have it shut down or forced to include males.

Do you have any thoughts about this?

Is it more important to be kind to biological males who want to appropriate everything to do with womanhood right down to pretending they have periods than it is to be kind to female survivors of rape and sexual assault?

Because it is this sort of thing that makes the words "be kind" get women's hackles up.

The kindness is only ever expected to be one way.

Brighton rape crisis centre sued over refusal to offer female-only groups

A rape crisis centre which has refused to hold female-only sessions is being sued by a user who objected to

https://www.brightonandhovenews.org/2022/05/05/brighton-rape-crisis-centre-sued-over-refusal-to-offer-female-only-groups/

guinnessguzzler · 20/12/2023 09:08

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 08:54

I don't actually think it is that kind to lie to people with dysphoria and pretend we see them the way they see themselves. The more people are willing to go along with the pretence, the more crushing it must be when they encounter someone who isn't prepared to do it.

I have thought for a long time that pharmaceutical companies should be trying to develop a drug to alleviate the symptoms of dysphoria, similar to an antidepressant. Surely it would be much better to help trans people overcome their dysphoria and live more comfortably in the body they are actually in.

But I doubt this will happen because pharmaceutical companies have more to gain from pumping people full of synthetic hormones for the rest of their lives, and society in general isn't brave enough to say that it would actually be beneficial to try and find a cure for dyphoria, because that would imply that there is something wrong with being trans.

I'd probably take that a step further and suggest the required 'drug' in many cases would actually be counselling or therapy. That's even more problematic for the drug companies because all it does is fund lots of individuals to earn a reasonable income while directly helping people; there just isn't a way to scrape a massive profit off the top.

TheKeatingFive · 20/12/2023 09:08

The blog makes it clear that the hormones given to trans women result in the monthly experience of symptoms which indicate it is "their time of the month" - even though they are not ovulating the hormones they take may make them experience mood swings etc

So appropriating language that doesn't belong to them to clearly link to an experience they aren't having.

I'm not sure this is the point you think it is. So they stop short of actively lying about ovulation. Great 🫠

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 09:09

Ramalangadingdong · 20/12/2023 09:02

I've just had a look at the website. Firstly, it is a blog that the company has provided a link to for all who are interested. I don't know why women would click on a link to read a blog about trans women in the first place when it doesn't concern them. The blog makes it clear that the hormones given to trans women result in the monthly experience of symptoms which indicate it is "their time of the month" - even though they are not ovulating the hormones they take may make them experience mood swings etc and there is then a link provided with information for their loved ones to support them. We haven't yet found a language to describe this "time of month" for trans women, but I suppose that we will in the future and it won't be called a period.

I don't see why OP is fussed about this. They state in the blog that trans women do not have a uterus.

This post is making a fuss about nothing. I don't like the idea of men appropriating women's experience of womanhood, but I don't think that is what is happening here. In fact, after reading the blog I get a clear message that a trans woman is not a woman, but a trans woman, which is its own thing. I think there should be more stuff like this for trans people and that trans people should find a language with which to describe their unique experience.

We haven't yet found a language to describe this "time of month" for trans women, but I suppose that we will in the future and it won't be called a period.

Sorry but I think this is rather naive.

We never thought trans women would be calling themselves female but here we are.

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 09:12

guinnessguzzler · 20/12/2023 09:08

I'd probably take that a step further and suggest the required 'drug' in many cases would actually be counselling or therapy. That's even more problematic for the drug companies because all it does is fund lots of individuals to earn a reasonable income while directly helping people; there just isn't a way to scrape a massive profit off the top.

Yes, I think in the case of many of the young people currently identifying as trans, and probably just about all of the young female people who are identifying as trans men or non binary, the root cause could probably be identified and treated with careful therapy.

Calling this "conversion therapy" is appalling. Conversion therapy is an abusive practice aimed at turning gay people into something they are not: heterosexual. Exploratory talk therapy for people struggling with gender dysphoria would have precisely the opposite aim: helping those people to accept themselves as what they actually are.

That said, I think there probably is a small number of people who would still have dysphoria no matter how much therapy they had, and I am interested in the idea that it might be possible to alleviate that with medication.

60sbird · 20/12/2023 09:13

I knew quite a few transsexuals (male to female) that used to take the same break in their hormones that biological women on the birth control pill did so that they could feel the same feelings I.e PMT as biological women 🤷🏻‍♀️

TheKeatingFive · 20/12/2023 09:14

so that they could feel the same feelings I.e PMT as biological women

Why would anyone conclude they are feeling 'the same' feelings as PMT?

Aprilx · 20/12/2023 09:14

I was going to join in declaring that I would certainly be boycotting this company if I used period pants (I don’t as I am now 53 and past menopause).

However it took only one click on the link and two seconds to establish that the company are marketing to “people who menstruate”. Not trans women / biological men. I don’t have an issue with that.

Nousernamesleftatall · 20/12/2023 09:17

You obviously haven’t read the thread. They do say that some trans women have a period which is nonsense.

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 09:18

Aprilx · 20/12/2023 09:14

I was going to join in declaring that I would certainly be boycotting this company if I used period pants (I don’t as I am now 53 and past menopause).

However it took only one click on the link and two seconds to establish that the company are marketing to “people who menstruate”. Not trans women / biological men. I don’t have an issue with that.

If you read the OP's posts you will see that they have a whole section on their site where they specifically talk about trans women having periods and urge people to "be kind" to trans women when they are on their period.

This is, of course, medical misinformation.

Flickersy · 20/12/2023 09:21

MargotBamborough · 20/12/2023 09:18

If you read the OP's posts you will see that they have a whole section on their site where they specifically talk about trans women having periods and urge people to "be kind" to trans women when they are on their period.

This is, of course, medical misinformation.

It's not a "whole section".

It's one (nonsensical) blog post.