AIBU to ask you to share your FFS online grocery shopping moments

[ThisHouseWillBeTheDeathOfMe]

To date, my worst mishap was thinking I'd ordered a pack of mushrooms, and I'd ordered one solitary mushroom. This one little chap arrived with a 4p ticket stuck to his head. At least the delivery man found it funny.

So, today, I logged on to my account, to do the Christmas order that I had secured the slot for several weeks ago. I'd secured it in a hurry, and clicked the first thing I saw that was over £40, with the intention of removing said item when completing the order.

Usually I click a bottle of fizz, but this time, I happened to have clicked a Duchy side of salmon at £46. Which despite being entirely raw and no extra ingredients added, is helpfully classed as "entertaining food to go". And the last date for amending or cancelling this was two days ago.

So now, I am committed to a sodding £46 side of salmon I neither want, nor have time to cook (at least it's raw and can go in the freezer) and can't bloody cancel. Plus the whole Christmas order on top. DH was laughing at the "forced salmon" we're having whether we like it or not. Less of the laughing when I said it was fifty quid.

FFS. Merry Christmas.

This is a popular misconception (that once they are on your order, they can't sell out). You are not reserving anything and ASDA in particular are notorious for rubbish substitutions or not availables once the shopping is picked (usually the night before,).

I don't understand slot of these. I do tesco every week and any subs I don't want I just hand back to the driver.

Normally these are pretty standard like blueberry yoghurts instead of strawberry. I don't like blueberry yoghurts so handed them back for a refund. Tesco also don't increase the price. So if Tesco bread is replaced by hovis or wherever then you still get charged the lower price.

Do you shops increase the price or lot let t send things back?

I've had a load of my shopping turn up with a useby date of that day. The shopping came at 10pm at night. Most of it wasn't freezable and there was too much shopping to check every last thing at the door. I was fuming and Sainsbury's never got back to me about it.

Oh gosh, I've done this. Twice! Thankfully, my mother lives around the corner from me and just sent them round to me each time. I was so bloody embarrassed after the 2nd time though, I only use that account for my Mum's orders now.

Buying salmon on Ocado but not doing the 3 for £12 and paying £9.50 for the salmon by mistake

Came on here to say just that. Had to do it a few times when my DH kept ordering gluten free flour. When queried as to why we needed multiple bags of GF flour it turned out he thought it was 'better', because he thought gluten was some additive. The real kicker... he's got a catering qualification. Do DH failures count!?

Ordering 8 individual carrots and getting 8 bags of carrots. 8 kgs of carrots is a lot 😅

I kept 2 and sent gave the rest back. They even refunded them 😁

Reject it at the door as unwanted. They should refund you then.

This is why I've ordered my shopping for the 23rd. It gives me time to get a turkey on the 24th. Failing that I've got a pork joint in the freezer.

She was lucky that they had that many tins in!

When I had my big dogs I used to order three boxes of 24 cans of dog food. If I was very lucky they would send me a loose selection of whatever spare cans of dog food they had in, almost never was it the full 3 x 24 cans. On one memorable occasion it was just 3 individual cans.

I was stared at a lot by the dogs that night, because I'd completely run out in expectation of the online delivery. I think they got half a can each and their gruntle was very much not in evidence.

Mine's a FFS in reverse.

We'd decided to lay off cheese after having eaten a whole dairy worth a few years back. Our online order arrived and we checked everything off, but there was one bag left with a load of food in it, that definitely wasn't ours. Opened it and it was full of cheese, 14 different kinds of cheese.

FFS, we both said and then reached for the crackers 😂

Once ordered 2kg of apples, this was subbed as 2kg of ginger. I wasn't home at the time of delivery and my husband just accepted the groceries as given, as a reheater rather than a cook he had no idea this was several years supply!

My fav ever substitution was the two 500ml bottles of Cherry Coke I was given in place of the whole chicken I'd ordered.

I meant to order 20 single Brussels Sprouts (I'm the only one who eats them) and ended up with 20 red cabbages. They filled about three crates. The driver thought maybe we were doing a lot of pickling....

Ten of us stayed in a holiday home in St Ives a few years back, so I put through a big Tesco order to arrive the first evening. The driver called to say he was outside....but he wasn't. It slowly dawned on me I'd used the landlord's HOME address, rather than the holiday rental address, and my delivery was about 2 miles away on the other side of town (weirdly, the road names were very similar). Bless him, the delivery driver said he'd try and squeeze us in at the end of his round, and he did eventually appear.

I was menopausal and I recklessly shagged my husband without taking precautions. It was xmas and I was drunk-ish.
Next day I went and got the morning after pill. The pharmacist was reassuring that I'd be safe but advised me to get a pregnancy test in a month, just in case.

Anything vaguely embarrassing like tampons had always arrived in my online Tesco order wrapped in layers of bags and hidden at the bottom on the trays.

Needless to say the test arrived, not wrapped, balanced on the top of the top tray and I yelled for my teenage son to help the guy unload.....

I pretended to be shocked and mortified and too embarrassed to give it back.

I've accidentally bought a solitary mushroom with a sticker as a hat too!!

The joys of online shopping!

Actually, that just threw me into a panic because I've remembered things I've bought for this evenings delivery that I can't remember seeing or putting away 😯

Then I just noticed the bags on the floor, patiently waiting for my 8pm shopping to arrive.

What an idiot I am!

I had to intercept 2 bottles of gin as I'd forgotten to amend... was telling a friend and she said you don't actually need the £50 item to secure the slot you can just pay the fee then when you edit the fee goes away. Has really helped me out!

Had a substitution of artichokes instead of aubergine. I suppose it began with the same letter.
Ordered a single banana and a single potato once by mistake.

Worst substitution was 36 tins of dog food.....we'd actually ordered a 36 sachet pack of whiskers for our CAT!

The delivery guy was so embarrassed he returned later that day with some wine on behalf of the store to apologise.

Ocado don't price match on substitutions so I quite often send them back if they are too expensive.

7 eggs broken out of a dozen. Packer had put them in the same tray as potatoes and onions.

My friend ordered a shop with pizza, fish fingers, oven chips, 4 pints of milk etc (like you do when you have several children under 5)- what turned up was approximately 20 tins of corned beef, and nothing else. She hadn’t even ordered any corned beef.

I thought she was being quite selfish really reserving so much. Fortunately for her she could afford it all and just froze it.
Interesting that it's not really reserved anyway but I suppose you're more likely to get what you want as if it's enough in advance they can order the right amount.

Sorry that was about my MIL ordering ALL the food and being stuck with it.