Long time lurker, NC for this.
DMIL kindly handed over £195k inheritance 3 years ago as we were looking to buy a house. House sale fell through so we fixed £60k for both kids in a high interest account, bought a car and due to going private for DH medical and also dipping into it when he was out of work, we've just over £100k left. Put this into a high interest account but, it's not fixed and completely accessible.
Mentioned this to MIL a few months ago so she knows it's been locked away, however, we didn't mention we only have access to £100k.
DBIL has put his house for sale but is wanting more for what it's worth. Hasn't had much interest and he goes into a higher mortgage plan in January meaning his repayments will be unaffordable.
He's living with his partner, plan is he sells his, pays off her mortgage, she sells and they buy something together with money left over so they can both retire.
DBIL also has a flat worth around £300k that he has a small rental income coming in.
Today, MIL has called and asked for the £195k back. Or, she wants us to lend it to DBIL with the understanding he pays it back after they've sold both houses and bought theirs together.
It'll mean we take kids fixed amounts and our nest egg which is all we have to get on the housing ladder.
Husband has ADHD so doesn't earn much and we don't have a large HH income so really need a large deposit to be able to afford something.
So....sorry if its been a long one but AIBU if we say no? Or, what they have is none of our business and we help out with giving them the cash as we are family??