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Original poster

Once in a lifetime trip - 3 weeks off school

935 replies

XMissPlacedX · 14/12/2023 20:27

My daughter has always wanted to go to Disney world Florida, but due to funds I've not been able to afford it. She is 14.

Her aunty who is quite well off and has a daughter the same age (my dd's cousin ) goes to Disney world Florida every 2 years and has offered to take my dd next year for 3 weeks.

The problem is it's the first 3 weeks of the school term ( September 2024). I've asked her if there was anyway of going in the summer holidays and she said it would double their cost and it would be cheaper for them to pay the school fine .

What do I do ? Do I say yes or no ? I would love for my dd to go but am not sure how much the fine would be and what impact missing that amount of school would cause.

I'm really torn

OP posts:
PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 14/12/2023 21:23

You want her to miss the first 3 weeks of year 11 to go on holiday?! No. Just no.

Chocoswirl · 14/12/2023 21:23

I would take her without a doubt.
Do you know for sure you would get a fine? Where I live, you wouldn’t for a one-off like that. Just a stern letter that you can put in the recycling bin. Make sure she copies up what she’s missed from her friends once she’s back and job’s a goodun.
We only live once and she will remember that trip to Florida for a lifetime. Will she remember anything about that 3 weeks of school? Of course not, and she will catch up. It’s a no brainer for me!

Dixiechickonhols · 14/12/2023 21:24

Is it definitely 3 weeks off school? My Dd didn’t go back to school until 7/9 this year.
Attraction to aunt of September will be its quietest time at Disneyworld with really low crowds and lowest prices.
2 weeks is a good amount of time if just doing Disneyworld. Clear lots of people commenting have never been. It’s Disneyworld not Disneyland, it’s 6 parks and is area size of Greater Manchester. The safari at Animal Kingdom is actually very impressive..
As much as I love Disney I wouldn’t miss that amount of school if she’s yr 10 or 11.
She can apply to work there as a cultural representative when she’s 18 - you can go for university holiday or a gap year.

dizzygirl1 · 14/12/2023 21:25

I wouldn't allow it. I say that as a Disney lover and have been to Disney world, including taking my DC out of school for the first 3 days of term one year. But 3 weeks is a significant amount of time, the schoolwork will be lost, If she has a practical course, her coursework will be behind, learning behind. Don't underestimate the amount of work being undertaken in Yr11, its stressful enough attending full time let alone starting off the year very behind.
Also depending on the school, her absence % may mean she won't be able to attend her prom.

ChillinwiththeVillains · 14/12/2023 21:27

I think the fine is £60 per parent per day. So £600 per week. Which would cost you £1.8k for the trip. Worth checking quite aside from academic and social considerations.

Natfrances · 14/12/2023 21:29

I would let her go, life is too short! She will have a fantastic time and make loads of memories.

Maireas · 14/12/2023 21:30

"will she remember anything about that three weeks of school?"
She'll certainly need to, the following June.

Lydia777 · 14/12/2023 21:30

Oh God, the responses! I am a Secondary School English teacher - let her go!!! It is such a great opportunity and of course she can catch up! The week before she goes, get her to ask her teachers what topics or coursework will be covered and make a deal with her that some has to be done before she goes and the rest when she comes back!

curaçao · 14/12/2023 21:30

ChillinwiththeVillains · 14/12/2023 21:27

I think the fine is £60 per parent per day. So £600 per week. Which would cost you £1.8k for the trip. Worth checking quite aside from academic and social considerations.

No its £60 per parent in total.Not per day!

Not19foreverpullyourselftogether · 14/12/2023 21:30

Absolutely not, your dd will miss out on learning and potentially grades. Let her go 2 years later if she still wants to. I would’t consider a trip to Disney a once in a lifetime trip, I’d reserve that for a cultural experience.

Paddleboarder · 14/12/2023 21:31

I wouldn't do it for Year 10 or 11. She will miss too much and find it hard to catch up. There are lots of talks about GCSEs at the beginning of both of those years, expectations, how to revise etc. My son is Year 11 and I plan to take him on a term time holiday next year after the exams are finished when the cost is more reasonable.

ThanksItHasPockets · 14/12/2023 21:31

So the first three weeks of either y10 or y11? No. Madness. Sorry.

Macaroni46 · 14/12/2023 21:33

Not the point of the thread I know, but inset days are training days that schools are legally obligated to organise.
And no, I wouldn't let my DC miss 3 weeks of year 11.

TucSandwich · 14/12/2023 21:34

This can't be real, surely.

itsmyp4rty · 14/12/2023 21:35

Would she be starting Yr 10 or Yr 11? If it's Yr 10 then I'd let her go as any work done at the very beginning of GCSE's is likely to be gone over again before the actual exams. I'd also be buying all the CGP books and looking at what the school does in the first half term for her subjects and getting her to cover that herself over the summer holidays.
If it's the first 3 weeks of Yr 11 then I'd be more reluctant.

eurochick · 14/12/2023 21:39

It would be a hard no from me. It's not a once in a lifetime trip in the sense that it will be gone in a year or two. I've enjoyed Disney but as another poster said it is just a big theme park. Also three weeks is a loooong time to spend there.

Don't let her miss the start of a crucial school year.

Isometimeswonder · 14/12/2023 21:39

It's not just about the fine.
It's so unfair on the teachers who have to catch the child up.
They miss the first part of resocialisation after the summer break.
It shows the child that rules are for other people.

Reesescheeses · 14/12/2023 21:41

Not the very start of the year. End of year would be different. Thats so awful of them to ask DD before they approached you so now you have to be the bad guy. I would tell DD that you asked the school and they said no.

ChillinwiththeVillains · 14/12/2023 21:42

curaçao · 14/12/2023 21:30

No its £60 per parent in total.Not per day!

Show quote history

That makes it seem like an absolute bargain. I had completely misunderstood. Thank you!

Saharafordessert · 14/12/2023 21:43

Absolutely not!

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 14/12/2023 21:43

thefirstmrsrochester · 14/12/2023 20:49

After all the sacrifices young folk made these last few years I’d say to take the holiday and to ask if the school can provide the lesson plans for her subjects for the weeks she will be missing.

As if the school is going to provide lesson plans for a student who’s taking an unauthorised absence of 3 weeks to go to Disneyland at the start of Yr 11 🤨

CurlyhairedAssassin · 14/12/2023 21:43

Nah, ridiculous idea at that stage of her education. Right at the start of the year, it's going to be 3 whole weeks of the syllabus missed. Especially for things like maths, by the time she gets backed, things would have moved on a LOT and she'll have missed the basics and will struggle if new topics have been introduced. If she struggles it simiply is NOT acceptable to expect teachers to give up their lunch times or after school to help your daughter catch up on what she's missed for a holiday. It's just Disney World, nothing special, it's not a family wedding abroad, not an educational trip to the Serengeti, not the funeral of a grandparent.

I record attendance at an infants school but I secretly hate some parts of the strict attendance policy when it doesn't make any allowances for different ages eg younger children will have more absences than older ones simply because they have an immature immune system etc. Even then I'd say that 3 weeks is unnecessary even if it were infants. For secondary, GCSE years it's just ridiculous.

Nanny0gg · 14/12/2023 21:44

thefirstmrsrochester · 14/12/2023 20:49

After all the sacrifices young folk made these last few years I’d say to take the holiday and to ask if the school can provide the lesson plans for her subjects for the weeks she will be missing.

And what do you think they'd say to that?

She's not navigating the Amazon.. She's going to Disney!

Bluevelvetsofa · 14/12/2023 21:45

What about the cousin. Presumably, she’s missing three weeks of school too and presumably this happens regularly, if the aunt goes every couple of years.

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 14/12/2023 21:45

Lydia777 · 14/12/2023 21:30

Oh God, the responses! I am a Secondary School English teacher - let her go!!! It is such a great opportunity and of course she can catch up! The week before she goes, get her to ask her teachers what topics or coursework will be covered and make a deal with her that some has to be done before she goes and the rest when she comes back!

said no secondary school English teacher ever…