Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my monthly bills are FAR too high?

227 replies

Mysteriousgirl2 · 14/12/2023 20:14

Childcare £651
Food £450
Gym & swimming lessons £360
Car finance £325
Cleaner £240
Pet insurance £38
Mobile £17
car insurance £60
house insurance £92
Private pension £200

We are mortgage free. I take home about 2,200pcm and cover all the above costs.

I need to massively cut down, don’t I? 🙁

OP posts:
TeaKitten · 15/12/2023 08:17

PlipPlopChoo · 15/12/2023 06:38

Why are the public sector making you do a 60 hour week for £2,200 take home?

I’d guess she’s a teacher as she said she’s off all school holidays

Boomboom22 · 15/12/2023 08:31

Councils also have lots of poorly paid education jobs like wellbeing tutor or education tutor that are tt only. For those between placements or not able to attend school. These do not pay mps or ups.

Tryingtokeepcalmandcarryon · 15/12/2023 10:28

It looks like you must be spending some of your savings monthly as the costs you list out come to just over £2400, which is what you bring home pay, and your husbands are £1200, which is what he brings home but then there are all the other outgoings like birthday / Xmas presents, birthday parties, dentist, clothes, breakdown cover, sky / Wi-Fi, adding to savings, your husbands pension etc.

So if your total income is £3600 and your total outgoings are more than this it just depends if you are happy with that (I’m not sure if you get any income from the rental). Another option (I appreciate its radical for some!) could be your husband reduces work for a bit and you cut the childcare, cleaning and gym bill (approx £1200) which is his take home pay and he runs the house / does all childcare term time and works mainly in the holidays / weekends. But obviously there are longer term career / pension implications of this and he / you might not want this kind of setup!

Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 15/12/2023 10:42

Ginmonkeyagain · 15/12/2023 07:48

@Mysteriousgirl2 the point is that £200 per month currently going in to an individual private personal pension will work a lot harder for you as an additional voluntary contribution in to your workplace pension. Especially seeing as you are a public sector worker so your workplace scheme is likely to be defined benefit, which is rarer than hens teeth in the private pension world.

Seriously, speak to your workplace pension provider about buying extra years or making regular additional voluntary contributions.

Thank you - that’s so lovely of you to give that advice to me. I will speak to the TPS.

OP posts:
Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 15/12/2023 10:52

Boomboom22 · 15/12/2023 08:31

Councils also have lots of poorly paid education jobs like wellbeing tutor or education tutor that are tt only. For those between placements or not able to attend school. These do not pay mps or ups.

I’m a teacher on UPS 2. My take home is 2,300.

OP posts:
Flamesatmytoes · 15/12/2023 11:37

Mysteriousgirl2 · 15/12/2023 10:42

Thank you - that’s so lovely of you to give that advice to me. I will speak to the TPS.

Show quote history

As an IFA I'm not sure I agree with what's she said. If you want to access your benefits before state pension age, then a separate pot is much more useful.

You don't get subsidised extra years, they are extremely expensive. Get a quote, but the best thing you can do is ensure that the investments your extra pot is in are correctly held with enough equity. You won't get the choice to the same extent in the TPS - AVC's are with Pru I believe.

TinkerTiger · 15/12/2023 11:57

It's all relative. 3 kids and a 5 bed detached that doesn't sound bad. The car is the most expensive thing for me on your list.

nutbrownhare15 · 15/12/2023 12:13

Have a look at the TPS website for additional contributions. I'm about to ask for faster accrual and a lower retirement age

greencheetah · 15/12/2023 13:59

What doesn’t make sense is why you have such a huge outlay on a cleaner when DH works part time…

Obviously you spend as you like but seeing as you asked. 😀

Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 15/12/2023 16:45

greencheetah · 15/12/2023 13:59

What doesn’t make sense is why you have such a huge outlay on a cleaner when DH works part time…

Obviously you spend as you like but seeing as you asked. 😀

Well, he works part time because the rest of the time he has the children.

He has 1DC all of Monday (and takes her to classes etc) and then he works roughly 9-2:30 on the other days, so that he can be there for school pick up. We live rurally so the school run is 45 mins and then as soon as he gets home, he’s cooking dinner.

It’s hard to explain really but when he’s not working, he’s got all three of the children full time. One is heavily autistic and can be really difficult to handle so it’s not like he can drop everything and mop the floors.

On Sundays I spend 2-3 hours tidying, doing laundry etc ready for our cleaner who comes during the week. Yes, I suppose we could drop the cleaner but it would either mean me spending more hours over the weekend cleaning or the house being a lot messier, or probably a combination of them both.

OP posts:
Daisies12 · 15/12/2023 16:48

Why on earth is DH paying so little? All your outgoings seems incredibly high to me. Our house insurance is £100 a year.

Coralsunset · 15/12/2023 16:52

Your DH is taking the piss.

lljkk · 15/12/2023 17:14

Why are some PP so incompetent at reading that OP's MALE partner does most the routine childcare? Could it be because the partner is MALE, bychance? According to MNers, If one partner earns less because they do most the childcare they must be a saintly bedraggled poor wee thing (like all females) unless that under-provider is male in which case, being male, they must be an exploitive predatory cocklodger bastard (like all males).

That's why you're getting such weird answers, OP.

Is it too difficult for partner to do all the cleaning when the kids are also home, OP? House insurance does seem high, pension review was a good suggestion. I flipping hate cleaning. I can understand how nice it must be to have a cleaner for those few hours.

Chatterbuginabox · 15/12/2023 18:07

Have you claimed DLA for SEN child? Ive read in pps they are severely autistic, as is my son. I get over £500pcm for him to meet his needs. I work and savings are irrelevant.

this could cover the cost of gym and cleaner as possibly this is required to meet his sensory needs, and I absolutely get why a regular, routine works better than a holiday that can disrupt a autistic childs balance.

for those who don’t get why they need a cleaner, i can say that there is no way one person can care for an severely autistic child and safeguard other children and clean. Its just no dooable. This is what dla is for - to pay a cleaner so the dad can give the child 💯

PrimoPiatti · 15/12/2023 19:48

You say your savings preclude UC, are you getting at least 5% on them...?

Morgysmum · 15/12/2023 20:08

How many kids do you have?
I only ask because my sons swimming lessons where £28 a month, but also he could swim for free, (when not doing lessons) I don't have a gym subscription, but gym and swimming is £30 and that's at the dear gym.
We have some which at gym only these are about £15:95 a month.
Maybe look around and see if you can find a cheaper gym.

Umbrella15 · 15/12/2023 20:14

Do you really need a cleaner, cant you do the cleaning yourself like most of the working population ?. As for thr gym, that is incredably high, I pay £35 a month for unlimited use of the gym and the swimming pool. Her house insurance is also very high. I live in a 5 bedroomed house, and pay half of what your paying. Your food bill seems relatively cheap.

Blueink · 15/12/2023 21:13

You are very efficient with food costs, which after housing is my biggest expense these days.

It sounds like you really need the cleaner.

If you are confident in the water and enjoy swimming the lessons are a complete waste of money. I’ve taught several DC to swim, it’s far easier and more enjoyable than most skills we have to teach as parents.

Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 15/12/2023 21:14

PrimoPiatti · 15/12/2023 19:48

You say your savings preclude UC, are you getting at least 5% on them...?

No, I wasn’t until about two days ago, when I started to review everything. Now I’ve switched to get about 5.2%

OP posts:
Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 15/12/2023 21:16

Morgysmum · 15/12/2023 20:08

How many kids do you have?
I only ask because my sons swimming lessons where £28 a month, but also he could swim for free, (when not doing lessons) I don't have a gym subscription, but gym and swimming is £30 and that's at the dear gym.
We have some which at gym only these are about £15:95 a month.
Maybe look around and see if you can find a cheaper gym.

We have 3DC, so at your rate we would be paying £84 for swimming lessons.

OP posts:
Blueink · 15/12/2023 21:20

To add, we never used swimming floats or arm bands which IMO slow things down… but you would need 2 of you with 2 non swimmers.

SgtJuneAckland · 15/12/2023 21:29

What's the £600 mortgage your DH pays?

CantFindTheBeat · 15/12/2023 21:36

I think the David Lloyd is worth its weight in gold with 3 DCs, OP.

It's a built-in activity centre, all day, every day. If you're using it to its full potential then I'd do your utmost to keep it.

School holidays by the outdoor pool with its own sandwiches and a couple of bought drinks felt like luxury when our kids were small.

Original poster
Mysteriousgirl2 · 15/12/2023 21:39

CantFindTheBeat · 15/12/2023 21:36

I think the David Lloyd is worth its weight in gold with 3 DCs, OP.

It's a built-in activity centre, all day, every day. If you're using it to its full potential then I'd do your utmost to keep it.

School holidays by the outdoor pool with its own sandwiches and a couple of bought drinks felt like luxury when our kids were small.

Yes, I agree. It’s actually even better in the winter as it’s somewhere warm to go. I do use it a lot in the school holidays. The children love going there.

OP posts:
CantFindTheBeat · 15/12/2023 21:44

Mine did too,OP.

I have so many fond memories. It would have cost so much more to occupy them. I used to think of it as less than £10 per visit for all of us.

Swipe left for the next trending thread