@ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees @Over40Overdating
I already explained I do not have time to be reading through and personally answering every post right now and I want to listen to the woman's hour interview also.
I never attacked anyone on the basis of their fertility status.
I said women - and indeed men - who do not have children (for whatever the reason), do have some privileges/advantages in life in terms of predominantly their capacity to invest in themselves physically, mentally, financially.
Likewise, people with children will have other privileges and advantages, the main one being the privilege of having children.
There appears to have been a misunderstanding also in my use of language, I said childless when I meant child free (already explained).
Whenever I was going through my own fertility battle there was not the same differentiation - childless did not exclusively mean those who couldn't biologically have children, but was an overarching term for people without children "childfree".
There is no way I would be jealous of anyone having fertility issues, that would be utter lunacy. It was hellish when I went through it. Thankfully, therapy and a good support system helped me to get through and come to terms with our family being more limited than we would have liked. I would recommend this as a course of action over attacking working Mums.
In terms of my friends who don't have children (95% of whom didn't want them, took on step children, or are still not ready), they have a vast amount of free time outside of working hours. They have more hobbies, holidays, fun, they are less overwhelmed, their home life is more straightforward and calmer, they have more time for their partners, friends and extended family, if they wish to change career or study a course or move to a different city there is virtually nothing to impede them, they get adequate sleep and better health.... it is all of those things I think to myself, gosh I wish I had appreciated all of that more prior to having children.
And I think that may have been why I was peeved by the article; I was sleep deprived and exhausted dealing with an ill disabled child. And there was this woman, depicted completely serene, well rested and glam, complaining that essentially her "me time" was being screwed up by working Mums and demanding that the only bit of slack Mum's get cut to help them cope be taken away and going on about the "holiday" of maternity leave..... I mean it was crazy to read.
The real issue is inadequate management, lack of childcare options around holiday periods and unequal distribution of childcare responsibility between parents.
Women fought for the right to work alongside men and have the same workload, the same rights, the same treatment.
The exception is for women who are pregnant, the parent on maternity, working parents - be they male or female - and the disabled all of whom can request flexible working and/or reasonable adjustments because they have just cause for doing so.
If you are unhappy with your job and the conditions that surround it, including heavy workload around holiday times and management failures, then you leave that job, retrain for something else, or demand that management do better. Sitting for years on end feeling resentful and misdirecting anger due to personal reasons, it doesn't help anyone in the workplace.