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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder if something is actually wrong with me or whether I’m just a bit weird?

151 replies

weitdsj · 13/12/2023 20:12

Today I went to the hairdressers. It was cold and they brought a tea as is often the case. The hairdresser had gone to get the colour chart and I poured the tea, then sort of dipped my nose into the cup, not touching the tea but enough so the warmth hit my face. The cup was essentially completely over my face and I had leaned forward slightly to do this, it sort of suctioned the cup to my face. Obviously as you breath it makes it warmer initially so I was still doing it when the hairdresser came back. He looked astonished. I removed myself from the cup and he asked if I was ok, I said I was cold and tried to brush it off.

I have been thinking all day that I do things like this often. Am I lacking social awareness? A bit stupid? What is it? I can totally see in reflection that it was extremely weird but at the time it didn’t cross my mind at all.

OP posts:
TheOccupier · 13/12/2023 23:51

Totally weird. Most of us have odd habits but by the time we finish primary school we've got a sense of what is and isn't appropriate behaviour to display in a public place. Sticking your whole face into a hot drink like some sort of Labrador is a really peculiar thing to do, especially when you know other people can see. Also seems unwise - don't you ever scald your face?

WinterDeWinter · 13/12/2023 23:54

When you say ‘this stuff’ @weitdsj are there other things you do that you know are unusual? It might help to know about them especially if they’re sensory and you think you might be autistic or otherwise ND.

UndertheCedartree · 13/12/2023 23:55

I do that! I'm autistic! I think you sound great 😊

UndertheCedartree · 13/12/2023 23:57

BreakfastAtMilliways · 13/12/2023 20:23

I remember at secondary school I used to stick my ruler down my knee length socks because I liked the sensation - it was akin to how your hand feels in a bucketful of dried beans. Unfortunately my French teacher saw me do it one day and made a sarky comment about it. 😳🤣

I used to do this too! I'd forgotten about that.

HeathrowQuestion · 14/12/2023 00:01

Oh… I do this too at home occasionally and never thought it was particularly weird. I’d not do it in public as I’d be self conscious, though.

I think this is the sort of thing kids do freely when they are kids, and that we grow out of owing to social codes when we are older. Underneath though, we don’t change that much. Humans are by nature sensory-seeking. It’s literally how we have continued on as a species for so long.

Isittimeformynapyet · 14/12/2023 00:03

Jellykat · 13/12/2023 20:34

How do you stop the tea from going on your face and burning it? Confused one misjudged angle and its a goner surely?

Reminds me of when younger, brushing Copydex over your hand, waiting for it to dry, then peeling it off.. just because!

All perfectly acceptable by my book

I did this. I used to make Copydex rubber bands. I used to be slightly surreptitious as I knew it was wasteful. It stunk didn't it!

I can't remember actually glueing anything with Copydex 🤔

UndertheCedartree · 14/12/2023 00:03

KeepingTrying · 13/12/2023 21:33

I think it sounds as though you have original and interesting ideas and you are not driven by how other people view you, which is good. I worry slightly that you might burn yourself.

I used to do similar things and I have an adult ASD diagnosis now. I also have interesting and original ideas which unfortunately turn out to be slightly unsafe. My doctor sees more of me than is really ideal.

Do you also peel the chocolate off kitkats with your teeth in public? I did that for years, and it's only since I got the ASD diagnosis that I have realised that that is probably not the most attractive thing to do.

I do that with Kit-kats. Never thought I shouldn't do it in public but now you mention it 😂

HeathrowQuestion · 14/12/2023 00:03

@TheOccupier that’s a pretty unkind and thoughtless response. I bet you do things that others would think totally weird, unnecessary and ridiculous.

UndertheCedartree · 14/12/2023 00:06

TheOccupier · 13/12/2023 23:51

Totally weird. Most of us have odd habits but by the time we finish primary school we've got a sense of what is and isn't appropriate behaviour to display in a public place. Sticking your whole face into a hot drink like some sort of Labrador is a really peculiar thing to do, especially when you know other people can see. Also seems unwise - don't you ever scald your face?

Well good for all you 'most of us'. Many of us who are ND just don't give a fuck whether you think our behaviour is 'appropriate' 😂

MsRosley · 14/12/2023 00:19

Sounds like the kind of stupid shit I'd do. I'm very impulsive.

DC1888 · 14/12/2023 00:33

Coffeecoughcough · 13/12/2023 20:14

Frankly if you want to do it and you're not hurting anyone I'd say you should do it. Our quirks and idiosyncrasies are a wonderful thing 💛

Absolutely this.

Every single person could start a topic on this.

Robinni · 14/12/2023 00:43

Peachyqueen · 13/12/2023 20:15

I often have impulses that I can't resist.

I also have ADHD and Austim.

8 was going to suggest this to you 😂😂

Glad you are self aware.

It’s totally normal for you; you have sensory issues feel the cold more and then are sensory seeking to alleviate it.

Hugs. You do you. Don’t worry about anyone else. You are perfect just as you are.

Diggerdriverless · 14/12/2023 00:45

I might switch hairdresser. Never had a whole pot of tea to pour from.

Saz12 · 14/12/2023 00:46

But everyone has the occasional moment of away with rhe fairies when they do something innocent that differs from "normal public face". Its completely normal!
Talking to yourself in the supermarket, pulling those "ooo-aaaiiii-ooo" faces, whatever.

theduchessofspork · 14/12/2023 00:48

I am a great believing in being true to your (most eccentric) self

He was probably just thinking oh god is something wrong, rather than appalled.

Don’t worry about it

Robinni · 14/12/2023 00:51

Robinni · 14/12/2023 00:43

8 was going to suggest this to you 😂😂

Glad you are self aware.

It’s totally normal for you; you have sensory issues feel the cold more and then are sensory seeking to alleviate it.

Hugs. You do you. Don’t worry about anyone else. You are perfect just as you are.

Show quote history

Oooh sorry @weitdsj I thought @Peachyqueen was you…

This was my first thought as I recognise it (I’m also autistic/adhd), and two things strike me

  1. You do stuff like this a lot
  2. You are ruminating on it to the extent you’ve started a thread on MN - most people wouldn’t notice the hairdresser’s reaction, realise what they did was not typical and they certainly wouldn’t analyse it like you are.

So, not weird, but you could be neurodiverse.

If you are, it is nothing to worry about - realising or getting a diagnosis makes life better.

leachesleachesleachesleachesleaches · 14/12/2023 01:16

😂 I like you op

Superduper02 · 14/12/2023 01:17

This made me chuckle. We are all weird. I'd probably only do this sort of thing at home.

HoppingPavlova · 14/12/2023 01:29

I just don’t understand. You had a cup of hot tea (boiling water used I presume as can’t imagine making tea otherwise). You bent over it so the steam off the tea would warm your face - I understand to this point. Then, it suctioned to your face (?) but the hot contents were not a problem? I understand putting milk in, but even then I can’t drink tea quickly until a certain point as I would burn mouth/throat. But your face was okay? And they didn’t have to clean up when the suction broke, it all remained in the cup? I just can’t picture all of this.

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 14/12/2023 02:00

I'm diagnosed autistic and this is the kind of thing I would do to alleviate the discomfort of being cold.

Holdingsteady · 14/12/2023 02:20

If there are any comedy writers reading this, please include something like this in your next script. This would make me howl laughing.

in fact OP next time I’m in Starbucks I will be looking around in case you have accidentally started a trend.

Robinni · 14/12/2023 02:30

I mean when you think about it, most comedians are neurodiverse, they live this!!

Be proud Op, the next time I am at hairdressers I will face dunk for you! 💕

Ger1atricMillennial · 14/12/2023 02:32

Maybe it's one of those things you would do at home, but other people don't so it is a bit weird. Everyone does stuff like this, when they forget they are around others.

StrandedStarfish · 14/12/2023 03:05

Op, I attach the cup to my chin

Spartak · 14/12/2023 03:40

I learnt at primary school not to be unnecessarily unpleasant to other people for no reason.

Perhaps you were absent for that lesson@TheOccupier?