DDs school want me to COVID test her, AIBU to say no?

[mybossisaprick]

Dd, who is in primary school, has got the cold that’s been going round. She’s not too unwell in herself, and is happily playing, but she has a husky voice and a cough. She’s maybe a bit more tired than normal, but nothing that would mean she would need to stay off school. If she was unwell enough to miss school, I’d keep her off.

Her teacher pulled me aside at pickup time and asked me if she’d taken a COVID test. I said no, she hadn’t. Teacher asked me why not, and I explained that she wasn’t unwell enough to miss school, and so there was no point testing her for COVID. Teacher said that I should test her anyway, and if positive she should stay home. I explained that myself and my partner both have to work, we don’t get enough leave as it is, and whilst if DD was actually unwell in herself and couldn’t go to school, one of us could stay off with her, but since she’s not, we really don't have the resources to be taking time off. Also, I don’t have easy access to tests and I’d rather not buy a test when I don’t need to.

AIBU to tell this teacher that I wouldn’t be testing DD?

I also have Long Covid and I'm so sad to see the dismissive, uncaring replies on here. You are not alone, even though it must feel like that. I hope you're on the Long Covid FB support group? It's a good place to get moral support and can be a lifeline.

Having Long Covid is not good for your mental health. What a surprise. Being chronically ill isn't a barrel of laughs. What would you suggest we do about it? Mind over matter doesn't fix heart problems, inability to walk or breathing difficulties

I'm despairing too. Long Covid is dismissed and mocked more than ever. Why are people so cruel?

Agree with this. I'm sorry you have long covid. It's fucked my life too.

The most bizarre thing out of all this is as time has gone on, an increasing amount of research has shown how damaging covid is.

We are deliberately hurting kids - their education, mental health, ability to learn, their immune systems, their organs, their teachers, their families, their life chances and the economy.

I guess the same people that used the rationale that covid can jump species, but not spread between kids, will deny the impact of covid on them too. Doesn't matter as they'll be paying for it.

And no, I don't think we should lock down or that we can eliminate all risk of catching covid, but I don't think we should be maximising it either. That we have effectively stuck our fingers up at those who are vulnerable is abhorrent.

The idea that there weren't people who were affected by lockdowns and by covid infections as well is crackers, as is the idea that everyone who doesn't support the current overtly extreme policy of maximising infections is somehow more extreme for wanting a less harmful policy. There are plenty of people who isolate and don't get paid (I was one, and yes, I know not everyone is in that position - also wrong). There are those that would want to isolate, even unpaid, but are told to go in anyway - some of these people work with vulnerable clients - it is fucked up.

Someone mentioned treatments - there are no approved treatments for long covid.

Bit of a rant. DS was sick yesterday and has covid. I could be a complete shit and send him to school, or I could save another kid having a shitty weekend, or another parent's job, or even just someone's Christmas - quite possibly one of the ones taking the piss out of those who bother to do that.

II’m sorry but the pp this post was responding to did sound like they were asking for special treatment. And accordingly got lots of replies similar to MonsteraMama’s. Something very much along the lines of ‘would you be happy surrounded by potentially Covid positive people every day, because that’s what’s expected of the teacher’. Highly unsurprising that got lots of replies saying that teachers are no different in this respect to hordes of other workers/professionals. The pp really did ask for it.

I remember seeing this too about medical professional. Daft wasn't it?Looks like it's changed now.

www.nhs.uk/conditions/covid-19/covid-19-symptoms-and-what-to-do/

@DaizyDee - I’m truly sorry that you’ve been affected by long covid but you must know that chronic post viral illness is caused by lots of different viruses. The fact is that covid is now a very mild illness for the vast majority of people, especially if vaccinated, and you cannot expect people to isolate themselves anymore. Not forgetting the obvious fact that you are contagious before you have symptoms and that you could be positive and completely symptomless.

What you are failing to grasp is that nobody should be in that position. That’s the whole point. Not special treatment for teachers. The same - better - treatment for everyone.

It would help if people stopped saying it's just like a cold then. Because as far as I'm aware people don't get Long Colds.

I have ME from a different virus. Covid deserves more respect than the average cough or cold.

@Grimchmas But when do we draw the line? Surely we won't keep testing ad infinitum? I'm a primary teacher and most definitely don't test; I'd never be in work!!

@Grimchmas - no, we don’t call it long cold or long flu or long anything other than covid. I’m sure in time it will drop the specific label.

Why wouldn't we be able to get post viral symptoms from colds? Colds are viruses. Some of them are even coronaviruses.

I know we aren't likely to have good stats on it, since we all know the issues with post viral conditions being swept under the table and not very well researched. But can't see how anyone could rule out the concept of no 'long' version of some incredibly common viruses.

I agree it's unhelpful saying covid is or isn't like a cold or flu. No good ever comes from that, particularly as so many people seem to think cold and flu are descriptions of severity of symptoms (hence the whole 'real flu' bollocks). But not on the basis of long term side effects.

I’m not failing to grasp that, but that’s a different point. The point I was making was that saying ‘how would you like to be face to face with the public every day like teachers are?’ really does smack of suggesting that not many people on the thread are in that position. It does. A pp said that sounded like asking for special consideration. You said that shows hatred for teachers. I’m saying the earlier post was asking for special consideration, and pointing that out does not show hatred for teachers.

I’m all for better treatment for public servants. All of them. I say that as someone who worked at the coalface of the criminal justice system for 20 years, including in 2020. But in this context, I’m not sure what you mean by ‘nobody should be in that position’. Nobody should be coming into face to face contact with someone who is snotty and coughing while doing their public-facing job? I’m not sure I can agree with that.

I don't think that's what it can mean. Covid is still so common, and can be transmitted asymptomatically or by people who will shortly have symptoms but don't yet, so simply not being around coughing and snot wouldn't achieve that. It would have to be a reintroduction of attempts to get people to test routinely, rather than just when they're showing symptoms.

We never had the public at large testing routinely as far as I recall. And definitely not schoolchildren, which is what the OP is about. It would be a massive shift to go back to symptomatic testing and some form of isolation after a positive test, let alone asymptomatic testing.

It's a very difficult one.

I had Covid recently. I was very ill for 5 weeks, couldn't work, felt absolutely appalling. I really would have preferred not to go through that.

But the advice is to carry on as normal so this is leading to these moral conundrums and arguments

I agree, there are very significant barriers in the way of such a policy. Cannot see the public agreeing. But it's what would have to happen for nobody to be in the position of being constantly exposed to people with covid at work.

The vaccines have worn off now, unless you are eligible for a booster.

Believe me, symptoms are not mild. I've just been in bed for 5 weeks with it. I have no risk factors but it knocked me off my feet.

I think regardless of what the advice was, these conundrums would be there.

We had a situation where for nearly 2 years, people had a legal obligation to isolate if covid positive but there was no corresponding duty from the state to provide them with enough to live on. SSP only, and just for those who were eligible. That was a problem in 2020-22, Indy SAGE had some interesting stuff about how people were being priced out of isolation, but it was one that was somewhat swept under the carpet. And that was even before the cost of living crisis. It's an inevitability when there isn't the structural backup for testing and isolation, regardless of what the government of the time might be saying.

Shoot me, but I'd smile, say yes, then do nothing. How would they know? Covid us everywhere, my sisters had it 4 weeks apart. You can't stop catching it anymore. It's the new common cold in some ways.

@Inastatus however mild Covid might appear, it's still doing damage. Numerous studies show brain damage in varying degrees after even asymptomatic cases. And the mildest of cases can go on to cause Long Covid, which is taking people out of the workforce and causing misery for hundreds of thousands. Chronic illness is caused by lots of different viruses, yes, but the scale of Covid and Long Covid is another level. There are no mitigations in schools (HEPA fillers/ ventilation) and no policy for avoiding infection (testing/ sensible stay at home policy). It's madness. Thousands of children now have Long Covid from infections picked up at school. Meanwhile people are calling us grifters and saying it's "bollocks", even our ex PM. I have to use a bloody wheelchair and people on this thread are telling me it's in my head? It's ableism pure and simple.
Why should any teacher (or any public servant or any working person) be forced into risking a lifetime of disability?

I have to use a wheelchair too.

So much gaslighting, ableism and stubborn ignorance on this thread.

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow At least MN deleted the worst posts by VanityDiesHard calling LC "bollocks" and saying we're "grifters". One day ableism will be viewed with as much abhorrence as racism but we're very far from that atm

There are lots of viruses that can appear mild in the initial stage - polio for example. It's such a senseless rationale. If someone can show me a piece of robust evidence showing covid is like the common cold now, rather than just saying it, that would be great. For a parenting site, the way we are treating kids is shameful.

I’ve just tested positive today and I feel absolutely awful! This is my 5th rodeo with it, last time I had long Covid whilst pregnant. I have a baby who’s oxygen reliant so I am incredibly cautious with any bugs/infections. Although I don’t restrict my other children mixing but if they do fall unwell they are kept off of school regardless.