Being referred to as a girl

[Genericusers]

Earlier a woman maybe in her 50s said "let the girl come past" referring to me, a 30 year old woman. I do look younger but still, 20 something.

Am I being unreasonable that this bothered me a little?

Would you do it in work? Refer to your finance director as a girl?
People refer to other people differently in different contexts all the time.
I wouldn't refer to my manager's boss as a 'girl' but she will tell us that she is ' having the girl's round tonight' or is going on holiday with the girls.

Nope, I've been irritated by being called a girl for decades. I'm sixty ffs.

Thank you. Straight from being irritated or mildly annoyed to being told it's not a feminist hill to die on!

Doesn't bother me at all.. in fact I get quite startled when I'm referred to as "this lady," then I remember I am in fact in my 40s!

It is perfectly possible to be mildly annoyed by something and wish it didn't happen without being offended.

Your half-arsed insult doesn't make any sense. Must try harder. Lol.

YABU and precious.
I say girls, as in the girls at work, girls night out etc.
DH says boys, the boys at work, a boys night out etc.
We're in our sixties and neither of us care whether we're referred to as a girl or a boy.

I was reflecting the other day on when the transition happened in my own head from thinking about myself as a 'girl' to a 'woman', and I think it was only quite recently, once I hit mid-thirties really.

I would find it weird now if someone referred to me as 'girl' (other than the whole 'night out with the girls/ girls night in' type of context which is more common).

If someone said 'Let the girl past' about me, I would find that weird.

Have you not wondered why adult women are regularly referred to as girls but adult men aren't referred to as boys?

I used to work for a guy who used to say "good girl" when he was happy with something I did. He'd immediately castigate himself and apologise, but it never really bothered me. I was just happy he was pleased with my work!

In the myriad of offensive things that can be said, being called a girl (whatever your age) is very low on the list.

@monsteraa Some of us do refer to men as boys.

It is not very common to call a grown man a boy. If you do this then OK, but you are not in the majority.

Women in their 20's, 30's or even 40's plus are often referred to as girls.

I told my ds to “move out the way of the lady” and was treated to a mouthful of abuse because “I’m not a lady, I’m a woman”. Wonder what she would have done if I’d called her a girl🤣?

@monsteraa I refer to women older than me as girls, and I'm in my sixties.

She'd probably have melted into a puddle of offended.

Okay. I'm not sure what point you are making, sorry.

I'm saying that it is odd that we refer to grown women as girls but we don't refer to grown men as boys as much, and that is probably at least partly due to the patriarchy.

I can't really tell if you're agreeing or disagreeing or just making random statements, sorry!

Dh’s old aunt always called her bridge-playing cronies ‘the girls’. They were all 80+.

I got it the other day and I'm nearly 50. I do look a bit younger but not that much!

I was in the GP and the receptionist called through to someone else on the phone and said "there's a girl in here who needs ...". I thought it was funny.

@Marmalady75 "I told my ds to “move out the way of the lady” and was treated to a mouthful of abuse because “I’m not a lady, I’m a woman”. Wonder what she would have done if I’d called her a girl"

Just wondering if your dh held a door open for a woman who then "gave him a mouthful" and accused him of being sexist.

Because that actually happened too.

I get called a girl all the time. The only time it’s ever bothered me is once at work when I had a disagreement with a ward sister and she stomped around the ward looking for me loudly asking where “that little girl” was. That was purely done to demean and undermine me as are a very similar age (both late 30s, maybe very early 40s). The only real difference is our height, she’s a tall imposing woman and I’m short and slight, so I guess a bit more girlish in appearance at first glance.

in the context you describe OP I wouldn’t give it a second thought.

Next week: Is comic sans sexist ?

I am not sure if it's sexist, but I certainly think it's an outrage when this font is used to discuss things of a serious nature. There is nothing "comic" about illness and bad things happening and this font should never be used to discuss them.

In fact, I'd BAN comic sans altogether, simply because what is funny to one person may not be funny to another. Why take the chance of being cancelled??

The only place the girl comment annoys me is in work.

I have never heard anyone refer to a man as a boy in work - but middle aged men refer to their female peers as girls - or wee girls - all the bloody time.

Have you not wondered why adult women are regularly referred to as girls but adult men aren't referred to as boys?
They are in my expierence. 🤷‍♀️

Really?

'I met a boy at work today' - would you assume that was a grown man?

I was planning on writing a list of things to be offended by these days but not sure I have enough paper

No I have no issue with the word