Things you've learned from this site

[Tueresmuyguapo]

According to recent threads:

Everyone over the age of about 35 looks way younger, constantly mistaken for younger, doesn't have a line on their face yet despite never using suncream, and their nan only used bin juice on their face and smoked 80 fags a day but had beautiful skin at 103 years old.

Everyone had sex with their complete stranger dp within about 4 seconds of meeting them for the first time, their dp moved in that night and never left and they're coming up to 762 years of happy marriage now.

Everybody on here seems to earn 200k in some mysterious job that doesn't seem to exist, they can't quite explain what they do, but they worked their asses off to get to this level of seniority which involves them working 3 hours a week for 2 weeks a year.

Interested to hear any more.

Half of MN thinks Gibraltar is an island and doesn't know that Portsmouth is.

All DC get 78 grade 9 at GCSE.

All teachers are unreasonable to sanction any children even if they are attempting to throw a school mate out of a window.

The answer to most relationship problems is either to leave or treat yourself to a spa day

Lots of women on here have partners with a hobby that is so niche it would be outing to tell us what it is

🤣🤣

That the only activity women could possibly enjoy is going on a Spa Day.

That's the only activity I see being suggested to them anyway, usually in relation to them deserving some “free time.”

Wait.......Gibraltar is NOT an island?!?!?

That I'm in the minority not obsessed with fluffy socks and 'hot choc".

If your husband returns home at 4am, after 12 hours of drinking, pisses in the wardrobe, shits the bed, then passes out...you should give the baby to him at 7am and go out. Nothing bad will happen. This is perfectly responsible parenting.

Everybody on here seems to earn 200k in some mysterious job that doesn't seem to exist, they can't quite explain what they do, but they worked their asses off to get to this level of seniority which involves them working 3 hours a week for 2 weeks a year

Yep - or some other well paid job.

Someone on here asked if I was claiming benefits because our household has less than £50k a year income. Erm, no, and though my wages are pretty crap I don't consider myself to be that badly off (!)😃

And don’t you dare complain about his behaviour otherwise you’re controlling.

And if your husband disappears for 36 hours after going out for a party, please don’t worry about him or consider ringing his friends, the police or the hospital, because this too makes you controlling. Please be reassured that it’s just a case of his phone battery having died so just leave a key under the doormat and go to bed 😂

That an alarmingly high proportion of people who are literate, adult, and have access to the internet are mysteriously deficient in general knowledge.

Or change the locks and make him sleep in the snow when he eventually turns up while you line up your ducks.

There is no middle ground.

As soon as your child reaches 18, and perhaps for a little while before, they are a proper, capable adult, and you should no longer worry about them, help them, give them advice or money, or ask them anything about themselves.
You should charge them market rent for their room and kick them out with the slightest provocation.
If your young adult DC - who may be ill or in other vulnerable situation - is not in touch for a few days or her phone going unanswered, then it is helicopter parenting at its worst to be worried, call their friends or go round to their flat to check on them.

If they shack up with an alcoholic, abusive partner 30 years older than them then it's their business, and you you shouldn't say anything.

That stepmums can't do right for doing wrong.

If you cook for them pick them up from school, clean up after them, to take a step back your not there parent let there df parent them your doing to much and the father is a lazy so and so.

If you don't do the above your not treating them like family, why get with a man with kids if your not going to treat them like your own, stepmothers can't win.

Bit of an old one but weekends at centteparcs used to bé for bum sex.

I've learned that if you dare express concern for the rise in mortgage rates, child care fees or cost of food, you should think yourself lucky that you own a property and don't have a 14% interest rate like carol did in the 80s.

Apparently there is also a "cloth to be cut". The majority of us don't have this magic cloth

Everyone is meticulously honest and if they find a fiver on the pavement they will drive ten miles to the local police station to hand it in.

Everything should be done for the good of society rather than the individual and you must always think of other peoples comfort and wellbeing before that of your family.

If any posters partner or Husband dares to even sniff in the wrong direction you must absolutely LTB.

Once you have left for-said man. Any new relationship must be decades long before you'd dare introduce new man to the children and dont even think of moving in with him.

That women who are pregnant for the first time go into meltdown if they sniffed a barmaids apron. Or ate a mince pie with brandy in it.

In fact I am 😳🙄 at the posts from newly pregnant women.

Throughout history women have smoked, drunk, cleaned cat shit, and even bent over!! And still had perfectly normal babies.

Yeah, it's not advisable to do some things but walking past a guy smoking is not going to harm your baby FFS.

I thought Gibraltar was an island.

Everything should be done for the good of society rather than the individual and you must always think of other peoples comfort and wellbeing before that of your family.

Unless you are passing Covid onto them willy-nilly, and then it's, stop your scaremongering, have you had help for your anxiety, life is for living!

I do laugh a lot on here, the wit and timing of some posters is great.
Ive also found some genuinely good advice and support. And deep down i do find the bonkers posts entertaining.

That some people are shit with contraception. The amount of threads I've read about someone being pregnant early into a relationship with an uninterested partner. And yes I know it takes 2 to tango. The reality is is that the man can walk away. Not right of course.

The answer to everything is LTB. And, if that wasn't the question, it should've been.

In a related discovery, the majority of reasons that people will LTB are petty, childish rubbish and could almost certainly have been resolved by an actual conversation (corollary: the latter is not a MN-recommended method of resolving disputes).

If a husband leaves house for any other reason than going to work they are either having an affair or a “jolly with mates”. The latter is particularly unacceptable and they should be chained to a radiator in their spare time.
Absolutely under no circumstances communicate about your issues with a significant other or a relative. Lack of communication is a key to a good relationship. Instead, either be passive aggressive expecting them to guess and resolve your issues or cut all contact.
Everyone should be providing a receipt with their Christmas gift to make sure spending is equal among the giftees. Doesn’t matter if the recipient actually likes the gift. What matters is fairness as measured by monetary contribution.
The order in which people find out about big news is really important. Most grandparents care more about being first to find our rather than about actually becoming grandparents.
All posters are statistically-savvy. They know exactly what percentage of men cheat, what percentage doesn’t want to get married etc. They are not, however divulging their source so I can only assume they work for a secret government lab conducting social research.
“My DH and DD3 are NC. DD3 WFH and TTC. AIBU to LTB? WWYD?” - is a normal sentence.

Id argue that this view is completely rare on here. Thinking of others first. I find it leaning much more the other way.