Adults who don't dress properly for winter

[Bearpawk]

Driving me mad.
I work in an office where must people have a commute or a decent walk to get to work . I'd say about 90% can't dress themselves properly.
Young woman next to me ankle trainer socks. Midriff showing. Pissing and moaning about being cold. It's 1 degree outside and it's December.
It's raining and they come in wearing canvas shoes and a fluffy coat. No umbrella or waterproofs. Then expect to have the heating on full whack all day to dry their coats and shoes out.
In a training room all day where the lead trainer (middle aged, old enough to know better) insisted on having the heating cranked up all day because she's wearing a thin acrylic jumper and got cold to the bones on the way to work and can't warm up.
Everyone without exception has access to the weather forecast via their phones. It shouldn't be a shock when it's raining or cold. Yet they dress like it's May, all year round.
They earn decent money and aren't hard up so it's not a financial issue (maybe with some of the VERY junior/ young ones fair enough )

AIBU to fed up of people moaning about being cold or wet but making zero attempt to dress appropriately for the weather ?

You are the opposite of me. I dont whinge about it, but if I'm in the office in winter I usually have bare arms because I run warm (in the same way as you run cold). There's only so many layers I can take off while the heat is being cranked up and it can get very uncomfortable, and i start to feel like im sweaty and all the horrible stuff that comes along with that. Obviously you're at the extreme end of cold, but why should those of us that run hot not be slightly accommodated in the room temperature, when more clothes could be added for the majority of the colder people, who have usually come in wearing a thin blouse and not even a cardigan?

It’s not just about putting in a jumper though is it.

Until I was around 30, I did not know that natural fabric would keep me warmer, than several think tees would be better than one (acrylic) coat, that some shoes would be harder wearing. I also could not afford a set of long sleeved tops alongside short sleeved ones, a decent umbrella, waterproofs, thermals and all the rest.

Honestly, are people being obtuse or are they really that blind to the fact that a low income upbringing can put you behind in you both the skills and material goods that other people taken for granted.

The office is very warm to you.

Being too warm in an office is far worse than too cold. Too cold and you dress appropriately/put more clothes on, people can't strip off in the office!

It used to annoy me ok the office. The other women would wear cheap polyester black trousers all year around, with a top. I wore dresses / skirts in summer. And wool suits, sweaters, knee-high leather boots in winter. And a wool winter coat or a proper rain mac. Nice clothes were less expensive then, I suppose. But I always invested in useful, stylish items. My boss would ask if I spent all my money on clothes, as I liked shoes & bags (not designer).

But the other girls spent more than me, have online “hauls” delivered to the office all day long. They’d order stuff out of boredom during office downtime. It was always absolute rubbish, when fast fashion was a relatively new thing. Or they’d hit Primark during their lunchtime. Cheap ballet shoes were the worst offenders. So uncomfortable, I was actually better off in my high heels! The heating was always an issue, as well. They must be the same at home, I think.

Yes. Do refer to the responses I’ve already provided to this question to the many other posters who have questioned this before you, who also lack the imagination to think outside their own life experience.

One of the hateful things about being in the office in winter is the cold. I have a circulation condition and in the past facilities colleagues turned off the air con near my desk but with C 19 we need to keep air changes. I think I should be comfortable in professional workwear - say a wool trouser suit and a cashmere sweater, but yesterday at a few points I had to put on a down jacket. One large conference room was like a freezer - I was sitting there on my own on Teams, having battled in on the overcrowded trains (strike) I could have been at home in my lovely warm study. It was a blessed relief to get on the tube and train last night just to warm up. Yes, I have a big down jacket, cashmere beanie and cashmere lined leather gloves for commuting. Research has shown men are comfortable in a colder office than woman.

Wow, I was imagining the thermostat must be cranked up to at least 25, from your description, OP, you made it sound positively tropical. 22 is just a normal temperature, neither hot nor chilly, but in the middle. Seems reasonable to have a middling temperature like this, rather than a colder one that suits you, but not those who feel the cold. A happy medium is fair for all concerned.

And why should those who do wear a cardigan, tights, boots etc have to freeze for those who are always hot! Swings both ways unfortunately. You think we are being unreasonable and we think you are being unreasonable 🤷‍♀️ Just that those who are always hot in bare arms are always in the minority and those who are cold are usually in the majority so I do feel the issue is with that one person who is never cold even in bare arms rather than the majority who are cold without heating! Out of 20 people where I work, only 1 of them seems to have this issue of always being too hot when the heating is on

It’s not just about a fucking coat though is it. You don’t wear a coat sitting at your desk or on the sofa at home. It’s about layers, fabrics, covering your extremities. And when you do buy a coat, you have to know which coat.

I made a perfectly reasonable point, which you have rather proven.

@Nospecialcharactersplease
"Honestly, are people being obtuse or are they really that blind to the fact that a low income upbringing can put you behind in you both the skills and material goods that other people taken for granted."

Nearly all my clothes were second or third hand growing up. We had no central heating. I'm sure I'm not alone in remembering ice on the inside of the windows.

There's poor, and there's poor with no common sense.

I agree. There’s a Dad at school who is still wearing a tshirt every day and he walks a fair distance to school because I’ve seen him so it isn’t like he’s jumping out of his car. T-shirt, jeans and trainers regardless of temperature. Honestly don’t understand it.

So glad you find this funny. Would you like to see the very long list of other things I was never told/taught as a child? It would have you laughing all the way to Christmas.

But I'm happy to be in bare arms when the office is a normal temperature. I'm not happy to be in bare arms, sweating and pink because several people are in a thin blouse with no other layers and are complaining that 21/22 degrees is too cold for them and they want it to be more like 25/26. Put a cardigan on, and if its STILL freezing f to the majority then fine turn it up. But don't dress inappropriately for the weather and then complaining about it and roast those of us that have dressed appropriately for both the weather AND our own body temperature.

I reckon a lot of us have a preference for summer or winter clothes. My wardrobe is about 80% winter stuff and I struggle to find things I feel comfortable in when it's hot. It's not hard to imagine the reverse.

Also with the young I wonder if it's a bit of a throwback to draconian coats policies in schools, they've just got used to going out inappropriatetly dressed for the cold because it was normalised.

I do agree it is annoying when people moan about being cold and hot if they are not dressed appropriately.

However, I do think it is unreasonable to judge and moan about who are not dressed the way you think they should be if they seem content and not complaining.

I had a guy be annoyed with me because I didn’t want to shut my window on a train. It was boiling in the train car to me and the only thing keeping me from being sick. I run warm, heat intolerant, always have been, can’t help it, even worse when I’m pregnant and menopause is going to likely be worse when I do go through it I’m guessing. I was wearing three layers (A thin hiking coat, fitted running jacket, yoga tank, four if you count sports bra) and had to go down to my yoga tank because it was that hot. I chose the seat specifically because the window was open. We were the first people on the train. He could have moved to one of the empty seats further down the train where there were very few windows open after the train had left the station but chose to ask me to shut my window and shocked I said no. Anyone walking past could see I was flushed. Thinking I didn’t know Spanish, he moaned about me on the phone to whomever he was talking to. It was a four hour train ride so no I wasn’t going to shut my window and possibly faint which has happened to me throughout childhood when I get overheated. This was when Covid rules were still in effect so window had to be open anyway.

@littlebopeepp234 to be clear, it annoys me that people wear basically next to nothing then complain its cold and roast the people who have dressed accordingly. Not that 19 out of 20 want it warmer and 1 is then too warm. If I'm in the minority I'll stick a fan on, like those who stick a heater on if they're the only one still cold.

No, buying natural fabrics, waterproof footwear, layering up etc is not something we are born knowing, it is something we are taught. If we are lucky.

Agree that things like layering need to be taught but wearing waterproof footwear when it is wet absolutely is common sense (surely the first time you go out when it's raining and your feet get wet you learn that one) as is wearing clothes that cover your skin when it's cold.

Not my problem though and if you read my original post that you first replied to instead of jumping to the conclusion that I don’t dress properly- I did say that no matter how many layers I wear, the parts that are uncovered such as my hands/ face/ nose still get cold! So I’m not sure what the point of you responding to my post is for when I have already said I dress appropriately for the weather! I DO put a cardigan on so READ my post properly before replying!!!

I’m glad you had adults around you with common sense. Many of us didn’t, which greatly contributed to why we were poor in the first place. And then, when we grew up, we had to learn from scratch all the basic things you never even realised you were taught. Things you just thought you slipped out the birth canal knowing, because it’s ‘common sense’, like how to dress warmly.

Maybe you should READ mine too. Rather than being narky at me. People are different, we're at opposite ends of the temperature spectrum. But it's natural for BOTH of us to want to be accommodated in the setting of the office temperature. I can't take off anymore clothes without being totally inappropriate in public. You dress according to the weather. But the temperature in the office should be uncomfortably hot for one so that one other isn't uncomfortably cold? Don't agree with that. Keep it at the average comfortable temperature, I'll go bare arms and open a window or put a fan on, and you can add another layer and put your heater on. It should be fair for everyone in tbe office not swayed one way or the other.

If you READ my post you'd understand that's what I'm saying.

I find it incomprehensible in both directions- skin exposed to the cold in winter and opaque tights and massive jumpers in summer. But I’m either very bad at regulating my temperature or just a bit obsessive, because I spend half my life carting around extra layers and constantly adding and removing them.

But please, enough with the “poor people don’t know about warm clothes and it isn’t their fault ”. How bloody patronising!

I can't stand wearing a coat in the car. I rarely wear a coat at all to be honest - it's got to be REALLY cold for me to wear a coat at all and I think I've worn the "big coat" once in about the last 5 years.

I don't complain about the heating - but the thermostat in our office is jammed stuck on full so it's always boiling.

I don’t think I owned an umbrella until I did the school run.

@Nospecialcharactersplease were there no responsible adults who advised you to wear something warmer/waterproof in inclement weather when you were growing up? If not parents, a teacher perhaps?

I grew up wearing hand me downs from my cousins, jumble sale buys (do they even have jumble sales these days?) home made clothes and hand knitted jumpers. My dad used to go foraging for wood to put on the fire, but we all knew that if we were cold the answer was to wear more clothes. They won't have been cashmere or merino or anything expensive, but adding another layer of whatever you have is just common sense.

I'm sure I'm not alone in remembering ice on the inside of the windows.

Been there, done that and have several T-shirts. I remember the great feeze of 1963 when my parents could tow my sister and me all they way into town on the toboggan, and my mum having to walk to the end of the road to pick up milk because the milk float couldn't come up our road. And having freezing feet in spite of wearing several pairs of thick socks under my wellies.

But please, enough with the “poor people don’t know about warm clothes and it isn’t their fault ”. How bloody patronising!

Agreed LoobyDop

Maybe it's perimenopause talking but I'd be mawked in wool, thermals etc. I can't stand loads of layers or heavy clothing.