An attendance meeting at school for 5 days off since September

[Am898]

DD is 5. Since September she's had 5 authorised sick days off with today being one of them. This has been spread out for weeks and been sickness bug etc she's only had 2 days off in a row for a nasty sickness bug and the other 3 days she's not well enough to be in school.

Schools just rang me and said I need to book an attendance meeting as her attendance is too low now.. aibu to think this is a bit daft.. she's 5 years old and been off sick a few times, what does an attendance meeting entail 🤔

She's always at school on time and every time she has been sick it's been authorised as I've rang the office straight away so I'm feeling a bit confused now

I love this. Excellent tactics!

This is insane! My DS has had more than this! Chickenpox, D&V twice and flu. The teachers haven’t batted an eyelid.

It’s for the school paperwork to try to look good for Ofsted so that they can show that they are ‘tackling issues’

And do people think that schools actually enjoy all this box ticking? Of course they want to look good for Ofsted, a publicised poor report is usually taken at face value and can damage a school, even teachers' lives.
5 days in one term of about 12 weeks is quite a high percentage, if schools didn't try to work with parents they would be criticised too.

Schools are in dire straights and they waste time on pointless stuff like this.

Correction: Schools are in dire straits and instead of helping them in a meaningful way, the inept and interfering government/DfE/Ofsted insist that they must spend time on stuff like this in order to be considered a good school.

People need to accept that if they want their child to attend a 'good' or 'outstanding' school, then this is, in part, what they have asked for.

Schools are under pressure to improve their attendance statistics. Your dd's has likely dipped below their target percentage. It is not about authorised v. unauthorised but overall attendance. Nationally attendance has dropped from pre pandemic levels.

I'd advise going to the meeting. No point getting a reputation for bring awkward. One day, you may have some concerns you'd like them to listen to. Just explain why she has been off in an open, friendly way. Apart from a bit of your time, it won't cost you anything.

Don’t even worry about it…go to the meeting or ask for it to be over the phone just to tick a box but then don’t give it another thought x

With all due respect how is this relevant? Just because by some sheer miracle your child hasn’t been sick during school time, doesn’t mean that it’s anyone’s fault that OP’s has?

I would go along .The teachers know their child ,but to the Council staff she is just another tick on a box ticking exercise! The thing is that although you are keeping her off for legitimate reasons ,how do they know unless from a meeting with you to clarify the issue

I think it’s ridiculous that they actually want a meeting with you. Surely a telephone call will suffice where you explain the illnesses which you have already done anyway.

My dc gets lots of colds and then a horrendous cough. The school/s (happened in three schools) said she has to go in if she has a cold so I have sent her in then she starts coughing and spluttering and I get a phone call saying she should stay at home tomorrow 😐

I wouldn't entertain this. I'd say I'm happy to have a chat on the phone but I'm not wasting my time with a pointless meeting. Ask them if next time they would prefer you to send your vomiting child into school for the teachers to deal with.

My DD (6) was sent home from school on a Wednesday afternoon because she’d had one ‘runny poo’ in the toilet. I was told she couldn’t come back for 48 hours. She was absolutely fine, no other runny poos or anything but missed 2 full and 1 half day of school over it. Same child I had a letter about her attendance last year when she was off for a sickness bug and then a full week for chicken pox 🙄 5 days since September is IMO pretty normal for a young child being exposed to winter bugs 5 days a week and with a strictly enforced 48 hour no return rule for any sickness/runny poo.

In our school they do the attendance every 4 weeks, my DD was off for the whole week so her attendance dropped below 90%. School sent me a letter asking me to come in and discuss her attendance so I phoned them up and said unless the school policy has changed and sick children have to come in to school then I am not sure there is much to talk about. They told me to ignore the letter.

Schools attendance really makes me mad. Kids get punished for being off poorly, they miss out on stuff from being ill. And then they drag themselves in still poorly and pass viruses onto vulnerable children. I’m sat typing this sat next to my sons bedside in hospital with our 7th admission in 14 months. Has covid taught us nothing?!?!

It's because so far this term she has missed 20% of school. My DS school would not be bothered by this, but maybe your DD school has stricter attendance targets? See if you can cancel it though, it seems a bit OTT

@ConflictofInterest I have been where you are and your ds’ school and LA are not allowed to treat him like that.

This is the statutory guidance for how they should be handling providing an education for children with health needs.

If he has been off or is expected to be off for 15 days or more (even if those days aren’t consecutive) your LA has the responsibility for providing him with a suitable education. That doesn’t necessarily mean full time, but can do if he’s able to work outside or school or just as many hours as he can manage. The guidance also states that pupils should not be punished or penalised for attendance related to known health issues, so he shouldn’t be missing out on trips and treats) in fact it also states that school has a responsibility to try everything possible to include him in social events and treats and ensure social links are maintained.

We had a similar situation with our ds and once I gave them a copy of this guidance, took it with me to all our meetings and impressed upon them their responsibility towards my ds’ education, things improved at lot. Ds ended up on long-term sick leave, which eventually included being tutored at home. School made arrangements for him to go in for the occasional lunch to maintain social contact with his friends, included him in all school and class photos and invited him to every special event. He wasn’t always able to attend these things, but it made him feel that he was still part of the school to be invited. Ultimately he didn’t attend at all in years 10 and 11, but he was still included in the whole school leavers photo and invited to prom (although sadly he was too unwell to attend the prom). He also won a reward for resilience for managing to carry on going in for as long as he did when he first became ill.

Part of the problem is that often the staff dealing with absence/sickness have never been properly trained and are completely unaware of the statutory guidance and school/LA’s responsibility towards pupils where health is concerned. It’s often not the staff member’s fault and is usually down to schools expecting staff to take on multiple roles and not arranging for them to receive the correct training and support. So many schools seem to think the onus is completely on parents to drag a sick child in to school and are oblivious to what they should be doing.

Interestingly, dd is now attending that school. She is usually super healthy, but after catching a virus at school, was repeatedly ill throughout the autumn term last year, culminating in her developing a secondary issue from the illness which was pretty serious and required a prolonged absence. Her attendance hit 87% before the longer absence but they didn’t harass us at all, just offered support. So it can be done. I do understand the pressure schools are under re attendance, but if they follow the statutory guidance in each case, they can justify their position and back it up when they support instead of penalising sick children.

And thanks to people like you who send sick children to school with the ‘they can come home if need be policy’ I’m sat next to my poorly sons bedside on hospital for our 7th admission for a virus in 12 months as he’s vulnerable. I can’t work, I’m loosing income, and I’m daily watching him suffer more and more needles. Please consider others.

There's really no need to take issue with this or be defensive.
Schools, like workplaces, will have a trigger and a policy. Some schools with a history of low attendance will have earlier intervention because with some families it really works.

They have to apply that policy fairly and consistently to all.

There are lots of things they might be looking out for at such young age, especially if you don't have older siblings at school. That doesn't mean these apply to you. The school just want to check if they do.
Attendance gets worse with age, and expectations of what is "too ill" vary.
My youngest for example was younger during covid and now thinks every sneeze is a reason to be off.
At a young age they may be checking the child is happy coming to school and there is no anxiety.
But in some schools/situations they will be looking for neglect, young carers, issues with poverty...that they may be able to help with.

It's a good opportunity to discuss and agree expectations....so when to keep them off and when to send them in. And to build a relationship.

Schools don't really have a say in it. When attendance hits certain levels this situation is automatically triggered and they have to show local authority, government, ofsted that they are taking it seriously.
Your daughter has had a week off, out of roughly 12 weeks so it is quite high BUT she has acceptable reasons so there's not much you or school can do about it.
I'm an ex early yrs/infant teacher and school is awful place to be if unwell and I really believe children shouldn't be sent in, young kids often catch lots, personal hygiene isn't always the best.
Have the meeting, explain the reasons (school will know, they're not having ago) and simply state that obviously your DD will be in school when healthy enough attend.

Remember schools have a responsibility to safeguard their pupils, including when they are absent. Some parents keep kids off unnecessarily, (can't be bothered) but sometimes its to cover abuse etc.School are just being diligent.

As a foster carer some of our young people have days where they just can't cope with being in school and we 'take the day'. I'm very honest with their head of year and if that means there's an attendance issue, but their mental health isn't getting battered, then thats how it is.

I'd ask if it could be a phone call instead.

5 days is not lot in the middle of the Autumn / Winter. I've had 4 day vomitting bugs before now. Its exactly out of the ordinary.

Its when you are likely to get ill!

Hell are they going to require an attendance meeting if your kid gets flipping chicken pox???!

In Yr2 DH ended up with 10 days off with chicken pox followed by 5 days off due to bloody covid. Yes 15 days. Half of that DS felt well enough to return but wasn't allowed to.

By Dec 9th.

Yr3 his attendance was 100%. Apart from all the fucking strikes which suddenly mean not being in school isn't important (the othr yr3 class were unaffected by strikes).

I'm sorry but its utterly utterly bonkers to be forcing these meeting on parents unless it is persistent and goes on into the spring and summer or there are other safeguarding concerns.

@DomesticatedHippie thanks for sharing, I'm glad you got support in the end. That's really helpful to have that link. I'll be taking that guidance with me to the next meeting. I thought there was more they should be doing for children with medical conditions as it just seems so unfair and unkind for them to receive a double punishment, as if being ill wasn't bad enough.

Hope the meeting goes well OP if you go to it. I'd be interested to know what they say.

@lilyandrosa sounds like OP just keeps her off for the sake of it without actually encouraging her to go in is my point

Can schools actually do anything if your kids are off too much? Genuine question, my child is starting school next September and I wonder if I took her out to say go to a family funeral or for an event (I’m not from the UK, so any family event would involve travel and some time away).

My question - is there any consequence, other than obviously you child missing school which isn’t great.

Authorised absence is still absence. We have to hold attendance meetings if it goes below the percentage designated by the LEA. We’ve had meetings with parents in similar situation as the OP.
Basically the meeting will consist of confirmation that you aren’t keeping DC at home for nothing more than a runny nose and that there is nothing else happening that the school can support you and / or DC with.
We are aware that it only takes a few days to bring the percentage down at this stage of the school year but if we aren’t seen to be following policy then we would be in trouble.
Please don’t see the school as the enemy in this situation - we want to work WITH our families.